+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    southern adelaide
    Posts
    2,370
    Thanks
    32
    Thanked
    415
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Default Teenagers and pron

    So other threads have me thinking, how do you intend to address pron when your children become teenagers? Do you intend to adress it at all? And if not too personal, how were you as a teen re pron?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    21,646
    Thanks
    15,089
    Thanked
    11,255
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 5/2/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 31/10/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 24/10/14Busiest Member of the Week
    Please don't wait until they are teenagers. I feel it needs to be address in age appropriate way earlier that because our kids are being exposed before they are teenagers.


    I know that my kids have been exposed at school around gr5 give or take a year or two. Actually now I think about the first contact for 2 of mine was in gr 1.

    I talk to my kids all the time about s3x and they related issues. It a constant talk in our house not just one "sex talk".

    We talked about some acts that they may see in pron not being real or right. We talk about how we treat our partners. We generally just have a open discussion where nothing is off limits.

    I think I have done ok so far. Next year dd is off to uni to study Anthropology and gender studies, where she will studying a lot about how pron affect women. It is actually something see has been interested in and has been doing a lot research about for a while now.

  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to LoveLivesHere For This Useful Post:

    kel87  (14-12-2011),Sparklydreamer  (14-12-2011),WorkingClassMum  (14-12-2011)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    southern adelaide
    Posts
    2,370
    Thanks
    32
    Thanked
    415
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I've always planned to keep open about sex and cover it in age appropriate ways whenever they start asking this is how my parents did it with me. Im just curious as to others tactics when approaching the issue as I'm not sure, I was never really exposed to it till with friends at uni and no real interest in looking it up but I know my brothers have. I'm a bit at a loss as to how to adequately cover the topic when I had so little experience myself

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    21,646
    Thanks
    15,089
    Thanked
    11,255
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 5/2/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 31/10/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 24/10/14Busiest Member of the Week
    I was the same, very little experience. I just use what opportunity that present itself. For example yesterday at the dr they had cervical cancer poster up. My ASD dd asked what the cervix was. Much dh (ver shy about everything sex related) horror I went on in my normal voice to explain exactly what is and what job it has and why it is important to have check and how they check it. I answer every question she had. I make sure I never make them feel like we talking about anything dirty so that we will feel the can ask me anything. Now most of convo seem to happen in the car on the way home from school. I must admit I have been caught of guard with a qu about pron a few times, due my lack of experience. Those time's I said I didn't know but I would find out and get back to them and always made sure I did so promptly. Most of the time a new name for a old act or something that was . I went back with exactly what is was and why I felt about the act and why. Allowing a discussion where they got to say what they thought about.

    This how I deal with anyhow.

  6. #5
    Ana Gram's Avatar
    Ana Gram is offline 2008 WINNER - straight shooter award
    Winner 2008 & 2009 - Community Minded thread
    Winner 2009 - Mod Award - most passionate member
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Posts
    18,597
    Thanks
    1,028
    Thanked
    3,125
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    I think loving6 has the right idea. Open communication about s.ex is where to start.

    But you also have to think about the individual child in how to respond (I'm sure loving6 would be able to tell you that!)

    My DD is the intellectual type, she responds to critical thinking and academic work. Lucky for me, I have done several gender studies units, plus anthropology and cultural studies, so that is going to be the avenue I take.

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to Ana Gram For This Useful Post:

    LoveLivesHere  (14-12-2011)

  8. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    1,935
    Thanks
    393
    Thanked
    1,325
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    First of all teen is too late! I know that my daughter had a friend over when she was 10 and the friend was looking up sex stuff on the net and they came across p0rn.

    I have told my daughter that it's not real (she is nearly 13 now) it's not what sex is about, and that unfortunately a lot of boys are learning about sex from this.

  9. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    3,115
    Thanks
    748
    Thanked
    458
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I wish my parents had spoken to me... Perhaps maybe I wouldn't have watched it nightly for years on from 11 years of age...

  10. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    21,646
    Thanks
    15,089
    Thanked
    11,255
    Reviews
    14
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the WeekBusiest Member of the Week - week ended 5/2/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 31/10/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 24/10/14Busiest Member of the Week
    The scary thing is so many kids do learn about s3x from pron.

    Girls learn that they are abnormal if they don't do/like every thing they see.
    Boys learn this what you meant to do to be a man.

  11. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    14,750
    Thanks
    2,078
    Thanked
    3,540
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    I am trying to teach my kids critical thinking - so when we see something like an ad for anything - I discuss with my kids if they think that there needed to be a skimply dressed woman etc etc. This will lead onto p0rn eventually.

    I also try to teach self respect and general respect

    Luckily I have MOTH's full support and I know that DS will not find a girly mag in the garage or anywhere around our house.

  12. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Queensland, Australia
    Posts
    9,135
    Thanks
    3,609
    Thanked
    2,361
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    DH and I were discussing this last night. DH was saying that he (like most of his friends and other boys he knew) was watching pron from around the age of 11. He said that it shaped his ideas about sex quite a lot and I believe this is the case for most kids watching it....if they haven't done it before then of course they're going to form expectations and ideas from watching pron. It's a no brainer.

    We plan on being open about s3x with our son - and we plan on educating him to the dangers and horrors of pron. Just the same way we plan on educating him to the dangers and horrors of drugs. I do not want my son being someone who supports the pron industry and will do everything I possibly can so that he sees it for what it is - trash.

  13. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Pinkzy For This Useful Post:

    Ana Gram  (14-12-2011),Chew the Mintie  (14-12-2011),Sparklydreamer  (14-12-2011)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Teenagers at the park?
    By Baracuda in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 02-10-2012, 17:55
  2. pron question
    By trishalishous in forum General Chat
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 02-01-2012, 06:22

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Riverton Leisureplex
An Extreme Family Pass at Riverton Leisureplex is the ultimate way to cool off during the summer school holidays. The $30 Pass allows pool and waterslide access for 2 adults and 2 children, as well as a drink, popcorn and an icy pole for each person.
sales & new stuffsee all
Pea Pods
Buy 2 Award Winning Pea Pods Reusable One Size Nappies for only $38 (in your choice of colours) and receive a FREE roll of Bamboo Liners. Don't miss out, we don't usually have discounts on the nappies, so grab this special offer!
Special Offer! Save $12
featured supporter
Carmels Beauty Secrets
An online beauty and wellness site which offers simple and effective time saving methods and tips which help you look younger for longer.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!