View Poll Results: Should children have their father's surname?

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  • Yes, he is the father regardless and deserves that respect.

    6 6.52%
  • No, they should almost always have their mother's surname.

    1 1.09%
  • It depends on what BOTH parents prefer.

    48 52.17%
  • Only if the man is a regular in the child's life.

    9 9.78%
  • Not if the mother doesn't want it to be.

    10 10.87%
  • Not if they're not a couple when the mother has the baby.

    9 9.78%
  • Other (please tell!)

    9 9.78%
  • WTF? This poll has stupid options! (Shut up - I couldn't think of any better ones! lol)

    0 0%
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  1. #71
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    So 5 people think that because he fatheted a child, he deserves respect, and to show the respect he deserves, said child must have his last name until at least 18 years of age. And 1 person thinks that a child almost always should have the mother's last name. Anyone care to share what leads to these thoughts?

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    Indoctrination? Sexism? A patriarchal society that has gone unquestioned for aeons?

  3. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to BornToBe For This Useful Post:

    delirium  (10-12-2011),share a book  (10-12-2011),wrena  (10-12-2011)

  4. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by share a book View Post
    So 5 people think that because he fatheted a child, he deserves respect, and to show the respect he deserves, said child must have his last name until at least 18 years of age. And 1 person thinks that a child almost always should have the mother's last name. Anyone care to share what leads to these thoughts?
    I guess with polls, and 'anonymous' ones at that, you have the option of just answering on the poll, if you decide to then write a post, I would imagine it's to elaborate on what you ticked and so far noone wants to elaborate on their choice. Though, you never know, stranger things have happened!

  5. #74
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    I agree that it depends on your situation. We're not married but I hope we will be someday, so we gave bub DP's surname, because I will take his name one day and then it will be obvious that we all belong together as a family unit. Just a personal preference. It wasn't automatically assumed, DP asked me what I wanted and I said I wanted her to have his name.


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  6. #75
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    Anyone's husband ever take your (the wife's) surname so that you can all share the one family name?

    My partner and I will probably just stick with our individual surnames forever I reckon. Can't be arsed with the red tape.

  7. #76
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    Both my daughters have my surname. I figured it was a given they'd have my name, I heard no objections. All my siblings had my mums surname not our dads, so I didn't see it like it was a must do to have my kids have their dads last name, so I didn't.

    I'll admit with DD1 there was the fact that I didn't trust her father to come through at all, so that played another part in making sure there was no trickiness and she got his surname. Luckily, all worked out.

  8. #77
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    If I was a single mum, I would definitely give bub my name.


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  9. #78
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    can i comment on something else.. the whole passing on the name thing.. who cares? it's a name! i admit i have a thing about middle names but i don't give a rat's you know where about surnames. there are other people with that surname in the world. surely you should be more worried about your genetics, which are permanent, than a name, which you could, if you chose, change on a whim?
    that's what i think anyway. but my surname, to me, signifies a source of a heap of teasing so maybe i'm biassed.

  10. #79
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    I don't think children have to have the father's surname.

    My children have their father's name. When we get married, I'm keeping my name.

  11. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by share a book View Post
    So 5 people think that because he fatheted a child, he deserves respect, and to show the respect he deserves, said child must have his last name until at least 18 years of age. And 1 person thinks that a child almost always should have the mother's last name. Anyone care to share what leads to these thoughts?
    wow, bossy bossy

    i'm the one who thinks they should always have the mother's name. Because i think automatically giving kids the fathers name (plus mum taking on dads name when they get married) is patriachial.

    That said, i didn't read all the options fully because at the time of taking the poll, i had one kid pulling on my arm wanting me to do some baking with him, and the other toddler shrieking in my ear because she wanted 'pretties' and so i answered the poll half-assed.

    I stand by what i said though. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, and everyone can make their own rules. But i think the kids should have the same name as mum, no matter whether thats her maiden name or her married name. *shrug* i'm allowed to be contrary, thanks.


 

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