*I never ever thought I would start a thread like this, I have read many similar and always thought it was a little silly & immature but now that I am in this situation I’ve turned into that person I was judging. How little we know til its our reality!
I had an ectopic pregnancy 3 weeks ago, it was planned baby and DH and I were delighted when we found out (I fell pregnant on my second cycle after coming off the pill, exactly the same with my DS). Anyway, it was ectopic, I lost my right tube but luckily not my ovary and I know I am very lucky to have got it seen to so quickly and to have my beautiful DS.
My bestfriend is 22 weeks pregnant and wants me to be her support partner when she goes in to labour. Her partner has left her as this was not a planned baby (on his behalf but def on hers, which bf will openly admit) and I know the situation shouldn’t affect my feelings but I cant help it atm, I am finding it increasingly hard to be around her, or even really talk to her (even via email!) without sounding stand offish and I guess sometimes a little short. I am so so jealous, I want to be pregnant, my baby was planned and it broke both DH & I’s heart to lose it (which I know it would kill my bf to lose hers also, I am in no way wishing that upon her!). I just want her to stop, I want her to stop complaining about her ex to me, I want her to stop moaning about antenatal appts and telling me about baby kicking…. Doesn’t that sound horrible! Then I think shes my BEST friend at this time she needs support from me, she needs people around her especially as ex isnt. She came to the hospital before I went into surgery and when I told her how it just wasn’t fair, how much I wanted this baby, she responded with: “I know, I felt exactly the same about you when you fell so easy with H (DS)”… I’m not sure how that was supposed to make me feel better, it still bugs me she said it…
I guess this really is more of a vent than anything, but for those who have been through a loss when does that feeling end? I’d love to be there for her during labour but will those feelings still be there, do those jealous, green eyed monster feelings get better with time?