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  1. #1
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    Default the "naughty" child

    I dont like to throw around the word "naughty" so lets just say my DD (16mths) is extremely....spirited.
    i know she is young and doestnt understand blah blah, but on some level i know she does. she is just so rough, when we have playdates she's the child running around stealing toys, climbing on other children, and sometimes hiting and biting. shes rough with me too smacking me and biting me, we talk about using gentle hands and she'll gently stroke my face to show me but then she's back to it again. she pulls on our blinds, plays with the light switches, climbs behind the tv around the cords. i get down to her level, make her look at me and say NO or STOP, explain to her why we dont do these things, she just pulls away and screams or laughs and tries to cuddle me.

    I'm at my wits end.

    am i alone cos i sure feel like i am, any tips or advice?? am i disicpling her in the wrong way...is it my fault????????
    ARRGGHHHHHHHHHH

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  3. #2
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    Sounds like my house, its x3 here.

    Only thing i can do is reinforce 'we dont do xyz' & time out. If they're taken away from the situation, they realise they're in the wrong.

    Its not your fault, she's just a kid & a little on at that.

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    No you're certainly not the only one! My DD2 is a lot like this. She's 2 now but had always seemed to be like this. I laughed when you called your DD 'spirited' because I describe my DD as 'feisty' to other people instead of naughty. I haven't any real advice, just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. The only thing I can say is that I too continually reinforce things that she shouldn't be doing by saying 'no' or telling her to be gentle or by removing her from a particular situation. DD1 was never like this and i treated her in the same way so I guess it is just her different personality. Hang in there!

  5. #4
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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    what is her diet like?

    other than play dates, when she is full on at home, could she be bored?

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    Yeah I too have a spirited child! I'm certainly not going to win mother of the year any time soon, but one method you could try is talking in terms of what she can do rather than what she can't do. The idea is that if you tell them not to do a certain thing then their poor little heads are kind of like 'well what can I do?'. So you're giving them an acceptable alternative to the undesirable behavior.

    For example, instead of 'stop running in the house' you could say 'walking inside the house DD', or 'stop stealing Johnny's toys' you could say 'we share our toys when we play'. I don't know, they're probably not awesome examples but you get the point anyway. We have had reasonable success with this method in a number of situations with our DD. And it makes you feel better about yourself because you're not constantly yelling or nagging, it's more of a gentle directive.

    *Note to self: follow your own advice and start doing this again* lol.

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    We had a lot of trouble with DS 20 months bull dozering other kids at play time, for no specific reason but would just run up and push them over. Our MCHN recommended turning your back on your child and giving the bullied child all the loving attention first, and then turn around and say "we don't push others".
    Seems to be working... It's been two weeks since he last pushed over the poor little boy at music who he always pushes over, and not because he hasn't been there either!

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    I have a 15 month-old who's also starting to realise he is a creature with a free-will and perfect control over it! But so far not really too 'spirited' or mean to other children.... He's in the throwing-things-on-the-floor stage....

    Of course it's not your fault! Different children have different personalities just as adults do - some people are timid, some are fiercely competitive, etc.etc.

    If she's excessively mean to others.... think about things such as people she spends a lot of time around and their relationships... do people fight/argue around her? Are things cruisy at home or is there tension in the house? Stuff like that could perhaps effect her if she's especially angry but I'd say overall it's just a stage and personality thing - in other words, no worries and like a PP said, hang in there!

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    That is my boy ALL OVER... I have no help, im just here to sympathise

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    our dd is spirited too. makes life interesting!

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    My DD is almost 2 but definitely "spirited" and add in clingy and it's a recipe for disaster. I can't offer advice as nothing I do seems to work but I wanted to say you're not alone!!


 

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