My first son has been lucky enough to get the best of me and has had a loving nurturing mother... until seven weeks ago when number two came along
Actually if I'm completely honest i would have to say that during the late stages of pregnancy was when the depression started.
My poor darling second son has had a very different experience. I am short tempered, tired, angry and resentful that I have to be so attentive to my children and have no time to do the basic housework, let alone any time for myself. Sometimes I hear the baby cry and I just think "shut up already" instead of how I reacted when my first son was born, lovingly and attentively. I realized today that sometimes I don't even make eye contact when I pick him up. I am feeling so guilty and disappointed in myself as I want to raise my children from an AP point of view, but just find I don't have any energy to give at the moment.
Anybody else been there? Any advice or resources you can recommend?
I have been prescribed citalopram but as I am breast feeding have not started taking them. The local hospital has a unit specially for PND but I can't be seen until Jan the 19th. I was hoping someone may be able to point me in the direction of some reading that may help me lift my head out of the fog.
I don't know why this is happening, I had a cruisey pregnancy, easy child birth (apart from him being born in the car out the front of the hospital as we did'nt make it inside). I had some early attachment problems with breast feeding but all good now...