Chook - I am so with you with everything you have just said It is so easy for people who have kids to tell us how great and noble it would be to adopt. Apparently they would 'love' to do it, yeah right. But that won't let me look into my husbands eyes and tell him I'm pregnant, that won't let me feel my baby kicking or hear its very first cry, and these days I would have missed out on first words and first steps, and of course so much more and here I am crying again.
I really am sorry to hear how things are going badly for you. Your anger is warranted, the whole world sucks. I can't believe your FS's attitude, it is not appropriate for a doctor to "con" there patients to what they want, but like you said that is his easiest way to get his stats up. I know holidays and all don't make up for not having a family (although those with children do like to tell us they do) but I hope your trip to china does give you something to focus on. I want to see the orangatangs (hmmm spelling?) in Borneo.
Take care Chook, I wish we could meet up for a cuppa, stuff that, a couple of bottles of wine and soft cheese.
AFM - I have my FS appointment today to try to arrange my 'completion cycle' as I'm calling it. Haven't sleept in over a week, I keep waking with my heart racing and my stomach doing backflips.