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  1. #561
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    LG38, I hope the BT tml will show great results.

    Ness, i saw a fellow ivfer in a thread in BH having her bfp and her HCG was 45. So it could be your little one wanted to stick?

    AFM : Yesterday I was a basket case cos i was imagining all the negative things that could happen after my AM BT. I became anxious and nervous that I would lose my baby. I think I have actually not gotten over my last miscarriage two years ago!!! In my heart I am so scared it will happen again. I took DS out to playground before his piano lesson, sat at the playground and started crying. This so when I saw two young toddlers laughing and playing with their mums, plus one of the mum was heavily pregnant. I did not know what was wrong with me but I just fell apart! And I had to stop coming to forums because every time I saw negative things i started going crazy. DH wanted me to stop coming in completely as he knows my imagination is very very wild.

    So I may not be here so often now...I think I really need to go away at the moment.

    Thankfully BT result came in good...HCG 13000+ after 8 days and P4 is 300+... DH was so concerned about me he called FN earlier and smsed me the readings...that was when I started crying at the playground. I think I am mad...and very emotional at the moment. I just feel I cannot lose my baby/babies but I totally am not in control...and i am very much a control freak...I really need to learn to just let go and enjoy this time...DH says anything can happen, just enjoy right now...there will be much more if I want to imagine...down syndrome test etc etc...he said one million and one things can go wrong so dont worry and just relax...I will try to do just that...I am so so sorry ladies for the rant...I think I needed to deal with my own demons. I so wish to be here to support anyone of you but all this waiting is also driving me nuts.

    Pls know that I will be thinking of you ladies.

  2. #562
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    LG it's going to be a difficult night for you to switch off - I'll be thinking of you & am not convinced that AF is coming - although I know how scary that feeling is and have been obsessively checking right up until today when I decided that I may be OK. I'm not going to play it down I understand it's all consuming, you have come so close after 7 yrs Will be here waiting for results

    M20 Sounds like you are very hormonal right now & the grief from the m/c and all the IVF stress is just messing with you atm. I think you will settle down soon. Just do whatever you can to get through this emotional time

  3. #563
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    LG - for the blood test tomorrow

    Ness - great to hear your line was darker.

    Mum2One - Good to hear your BT results were good. Hang in there.

    Spot - Pleased to hear all is going well.

    I am hoping for the best for everyone.

    ATM I am taking Provera - it has made my morning temp rise but it is all artificial.

    Things are getting busy for me at work, so will try to stick away from BH during the day.

  4. #564
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    jayemkayare is offline Miracles don't just happen, they take hard work and determination.
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    Just popping on quickly to wish LG all the best for tomorrow. The bleeding sucks, but as long as it sticks to spotting it is ok. Crinone and high P4 cause cramping too. Your nurse sounds very uncaring. You should have been brought in early for a BT. I hope tomorrow brings you great news and the bleeding stops, can't relax with that going on I know. to you hon. So stressful. And you have every right to do a HPT, stupid cow. The nurse, not you.

  5. #565
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    Hi All ,

    Thanks for all the good wishes, I really appreciate the support.

    Ness - Yes tonight and tomorrow will be hard, but I know I'm not alone and you have all been through similar stresses. I just wish this journey was easier for us all.

    Jaye - thats exactly what I thought re FN. Honestly, I say this to people that report to me all the time, if you dont like your job go and get another one!!Its that simple really, dont take it out on anyone else. When I talk to my FN tomorrow I am going to address it with her, because she has tendencies to be like that herself. Its not so hard to understand that we would be a little stressed by all this, if it was simple for us we wouldn't be doing IVF would we??? As for the pregnancy test bit, well I would defy any one of them to be in our situation and not do it,so trying to make us feel like naughty school children just does not float I'm afraid. Ok thats my rant over

    M2O - You have to do whatever gets you through and if that means staying off here, then so be it. I hope that the next few months bring you some peace of mind

  6. #566
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    lola77 is offline BH Advocate - Sydney: Northern Beaches
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    Lg - I had brown spotting just before I got my last BFP, and that was after I got a BFN on a HPT. Fingers crossed for a good result tomorrow.

    Ness - are you really having no more BTs? I would be going insane just waiting on the scan!

    Spot - so happy that you are finally having your dreams come true. I hope the rest if your pregnancy is blissfully uneventful!

    Jfb - how long to go now? How is DS feeling about the new baby?

    AFM - funny that there's been a bit of talk about sharkeys in here. Been looking at them myself as I really feel I need to do something else. My FS is notoriously conservative when it comes to testing - he doesn't believe DHEA works, he doesn't believe NK killer cells are an issue, and hence I've not been tested for any of the immunological factors. I haven't followed up with him since last weeks BFN as I haven't felt strong enough to do my research and steel myself to push him into testing. Some people have suggested a second opinion, but when you're seeing the medical director of Genea, it's hard to know where to go from there. I'm half considering jumping on a plane to see Wazza as all his patients rave about him and he seems prepared to give things a go.
    I'm feeling a little better although had a little tear last night as it was my due date yesterday. Started reading 'The Happiness Project' to try to inspire me into finding happiness beyond IVF. Not that I'm ready to give up, just that I need to stop making getting pregnant my only potential source of happiness. I will get there and I will not let IVF become my life - maybe if I keep saying that, I'll eventually believe it

  7. #567
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    lola: sorry to hear about your recent BFN....when my EDD came after a m/c it was hard enuf and i was actually pg then in 2010, so even harder for you ....even tho your doc doesnt beleive in this and that etc it sounds like some testing would put your mind at ease at least ??? good luck.

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    Lola that is such a dilemma for you when the same FS helped create your only child & now not willing to try something different. Makes it difficult to know what to do next. I'm not sure how much Dhea contributed in my recent BFP but I do believe Saizen was a massive help for me. m/c is so awful, that is why I don't want to get anymore b/t's until scan because even the constant threat of it last time has scarred me. I really hope that with a little tweaking your BFP is very close by and in the meantime do anything & everything to keep yourself positive, healthy & receptive. I completely understand the feeling of it taking over your life & not feeling complete.You absolutely have a right to happiness

    LG How are you? No sign of AF I hope & just waiting on b/t results. Did you give the FN a piece of your mind. My theory is that they deliver bad news so frequently that some of them become insensitive. Cramps are definitely normal at this early stage - still waiting for your news

  9. #569
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    Hi All,

    Ok so just got results, HCG is 160, which they tell me is normal, apparently they look for it to be over 100?

    Progesterone is a little low at 23 which they think could be contributing to the spotting, but have been booked in for another BT in a weeks time, so I guess if they were concerned it would have been sooner. Means I may be on the crinone for longer than anticipated but I dont care as long as it stays!!

    For some reason I still dont feel settled?? Guess the paranoia just has to subside.

    Lola - thanks for the info, it helps to know that others have been through it and its worked out.

    Ness - How are you going hun?

  10. #570
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    Yay LG you've only about trippled my HCG levels I hope Crinone helps bring up the progesterone for next weeks b/t so you feel much better about it all. Still how exciting you now know IVF can work for you - 2nd round too that is really lucky. Praying for a sticky one for both of us now

    I just spoke with my FN from clinic before I moved (I loved the FN's there) where I go now no one knows me & had a different FN for each appointment. Anyway she encouraged me to get a b/t just to make sure that I am not having an ectopic pg as that would be dangerous to ignore.


 

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