This is my 3rd bub .. DD my youngest, was born just over 11 years ago (must change sig).
I had to discuss birth options this morning as its was our first OB appt, and I nearly had a melt down.
DS's labour was beautiful .. After 3 days of braxton hicks, the hospital gave me panadeine forte and diazepam which I took at 10pm and was out at 11pm. I woke all night with pains, but I was relaxed enough to ignore them and go back to sleep. I woke at 7.30am feeling great! At 8am my water broke in my bed, and I got organised to head to hospital. Got there around 8.45am and DS was born by just after 12pm with just a few sucks on the gas when I could be bothered.
DD on the other hand ... her birth was awful. I went into labour mid Sat afternoon... contractions weren't disabling until 7.30pm which is when Id say labour really hit. I didn't sleep a wink. I stayed home until 9am Sunday when against my wishes, EX and my sister dragged me to hospital. I thought I must be close as the pain was right on par with the pain I had in the 2 hours prior to DS being born. I was 4cm. I went walking, returning every hour to be checked.. I didn't dilate any further until 3pm when they broke my water. I was terrified and didn't want them to do it, but was too exhausted to argue. By 4pm I was only 5 cm and still not progressing. I was told the drip would just speed things up... half delirious and trusting them, I agreed. 4.15pm it went in and it was the worst experience in my life. I thought I was dying. My ears were ringing, I was incoherent, didn't know where I was or what was happening. I recall screaming for pain relief but none was given as my birthplan stated I didn't want any IV drugs. I did try to use the gas again, but was unable to because of the agony I was in, I couldn't hold the tube, or find my own mouth. I ended up throwing it at a midwife and telling her I know she wants me to die. (I did apologise afterward!) I lost all track of time and as I pushed DD out, my head began to spin, I honestly thought I was dying and kept telling myself I had to get her out safely and then I could die. She was born 3 hours after that drip and she was unsettled for a week. She screamed the first 2 nights of her life and the only thing that would calm her was to be breastfed. I honestly believe it was the way she was forced into the world.
I just can't do that again with this baby! I can't have that drip again I could barely breathe just thinking about it.
My head is spinning just thinking about it.
OB will give me a c-section, but I don't want that either.. I'm scared of them! Its a very big thing and it's a long recovery, something I can not afford with 2 older kids who will be at different schools (high and primary) when bub comes, both too far from home to go alone. And I don't want bubs to have to wait hours for a feed either..I plan to breastfeed as I did the other two. But if it came down to the choice of that drip or the c-section..then I think c-section will win....
Ive tried talking to DH, but he isn't much help as he thinks C-section is the way to go because he can't stand to see me freaking out, and he wants to take all his holidays to look after me... As thoughtful and grateful as I am, I'm struggling with that at the moment because he is pretty much doing it all now as my MS is shocking and I feel so guilty! He keeps telling me he doesn't mind, but it makes me cry even more...given a lot is probably to do with my raging hormones!
I'd never have thought it would be so hard!