Pre Abortion Counselling

[mummykitty]

GFP- just to address your comment re getting no responses, it is very easy for threads to slip through due to high traffic and a huge number of posts, truth be told had I not looked back at your topic lists I'm not sure I'd ever have found it and I do apologize if the interest it being 'bumped' is not what you were aiming for. It is a good idea in concept but there are many little things that would need to be worked out.
I hope you and your friend are doing ok

[SassyMummy]

I think this is the wrong area for this thread. It is not a supportive thread, and the linked FB site does not contain supportive, neutral language to describe termination.

Perhaps it should be moved to the Social Issues section instead. I feel it is distasteful to keep it here.

[mummykitty]

I think this is the wrong area for this thread. It is not a supportive thread, and the linked FB site does not contain supportive, neutral language to describe termination.

Perhaps it should be moved to the Social Issues section instead. I feel it is distasteful to keep it here.

Not disagreeing with you but I can see why it was put in the terminations section as that's who it was relevant to and who the op was reaching out to. It may given how it has become a discussion be better off in social issues or discuss it?

[TripleTime]

Yeah I agree I am the kind of person that makes a decision then moves on. I didn't need counseling. I do think it needs to be offered to those struggling.


Sent from my iPhone using Bub Hub app

I'm the same. I'm a been there, done that, moved on person.



If your struggling with the decision, than yes but not if you've made your choice.

[laurea]

You have completely missed the point. Four months on and my friend in question still speaks to me of disappearing from the earth, of being a killer. It's not about scaring women out of abortion at all. Do you think that this decision is one that all women can just say "Yep, that's what I want to do! 100%!" No! Whilst there are some who are certain it's what they want, there are many, as the page depicts, who wish they hadn't gone through with it. This is the case with my friend. THAT is who the page has in mind.

Re the tick and flick. Well, if that's how it's meant to be, then that's great. But it certainly wasn't at this abortion clinic. They were more concerned that the FOB wasn't forcing her to have one. All up, about 10-15 minutes "counseling" session was what was offered. My friend was the one who was outraged. I quote "They let me kill my baby. How could they let me do that?!?!" This original post was only an extension of what she had been saying to me. I know I'm just a guy and all, but I wanted her voice to be heard. So I created the page also.

I make no apologies for creating the page or for writing this original thread. At the time when I wrote this, I was hoping for help. Reaching out for it in fact. It was put up here back in August. I had not one reply. I had no input from any other members. No one was interested at the time.

Every day this person is living with their regret. I wish more than anything that she had been counseled through her problems then at the time and hadn't terminated. But she slipped through the cracks - that's not just my opinion - it's hers. I hope that there IS some more counseling out there - both pre and post.

Now can we please not make this an opinion thread now? Someone wants to create a thread arguing this and other abortion topics, go right ahead. But this was done for a person who is very close to me in their time of need and I don't want this to sink to the bickering depths that some of these threads get to. It was meant to be a positive thread designed to invite help for women who need it. I want it left that way.

Thanks.


You'll have to excuse the iPhone auto correct. It sax!

I can relate to the impersonal tick and flick. I was even spoken rudely to by what was quoted in the add as a 'compassionate counsellor' when i said anything in the way of not being sure about wanting a termination. I was only encouraged in the way of having an abortion. It was very one sided. I got the distinct impression that her only interest in speaking to me was if i wanted an abortion and when i wouldn't make the appointment outright she became short and hung up on me. True story.

Also, i had an abortion once a very long time ago and wasn't sure about it. I told them on the table that i changed my mind and they put me out and did it anyway..

[Jay87]

You know I usually I hover these threads but i think I need to say something, many years ago I had a termination at the age of 17.

My pill failed and I fell pregnant with my bf of 3 months whom was a massive drug user and when he found out he beat me and told me I was lying and kicked me out of the house we shared. My mother was the only one whom helped me move back home.

She said i needed the procedure done and I knew I had no job, the father was a downright jerk so I just said yes. I was an idiot but I had no counciling prior or post.

I was distraught afterwards because I feel to this day I had no one to talk to, there were no online support groups and aborting was very negatively viewed by everyone i knew and the whole ordeal just left me in isolation. Especially at 17 I was still trying to figure my life out and all this emotional burden I had.

Not even my mother would talk to me and she told me never to tell anyone and on top if it made me feel guilty that I put her through that.

So I attempted to take my life and it only occurred to everyone that I needed mental help and I received counciling for 4 years after the mental health group at the hospital strongly advised it.

In a time of weakness we need someone outside to talk about these fears and though I was young it hurt so much, I went on to misscarry 7 years after it with my current husband twice, one at 18 weeks and I really felt that was punishment.

But mandatory counciling afterwards I think needs to be, if I had it I wouldn't have scars from failed suicide.

I still see someone today but every three months just for a chat and clear things but I can't stress enough how much it helped me carry on in life.

[ek10pk]

Maybe it should be mandatory to see some kind of councillor, social worker, etc prior to going to the abortion clinic.

That way people can do this in their home town/ suburb prior to going to the appointment.

Even teenagers could see their school councilor.

And get some kind of written proof that this has taken place.

[Opinionated]

Pre abortion counseling is a good idea. But mandatory 3 or 4 hour long sessions for woman who are absolutely sure of their decision is a very horrible idea. Also how Long would it take? How further along would you get before being able to go to all the appointments? From what I've seen some clinics do over 100 people a DAY!
A one off 10 minute counselor to see of your in the right frame of mind to proceed, YES! But nothing more UNLESS the woman chooses so.

I agree. I can't see how that would help someone aborting a fetus who has an extreme defect, a disability they have decided they can't live with or a genetic issue that is incompatible with life, in fact, in those cases I think it would be just plain cruel to force it.

I've looked at your facebook page, and to be honest I think it does come across a little anti-abortion, probably because of how you feel about your friend. I am all for increased services, but I think they should be free and available, not mandatory.

[bubbabailey]

There are alot of free counseling to help make your decision and for post abortion too. " children by choice" is the most helpful, non judgmental, confidential counseling there is. I don't think you need " better" counseling. Women need better education on how and where to access these services.

I have been in this situation and was forced by my mother to terminate my baby, I was 15 at the time. I went to Children by choice and they did nothing to help me and nothing to stand by me, my mothre still had her way and I still miss that child to this day.
If I was made to do this or offered this it may have made things worse for me.... I dont think this is the answer.