Forcing one year old to take a pony ride?

**javic** · 28-08-2011 19:07

Today, we were at a market where they had pony rides. While ds was having one this other dad was forcing his one year old girl to go too. She cried to get off at the start but the dad held her on. And then she cried and screamed to get off as they went around but he wouldn't take her off. I felt really mad about it. Is it normal for a dad to do this? Would you think it's ok if your husband did this with your child?

**Boobycino** · 28-08-2011 19:19

I'd be ****y if my DF made Jasper have a pony ride against his will, but that's me.

Maybe the dad thought she'd overcome the fear and have fun?

**missie_mack** · 28-08-2011 19:39

Not knowing the child I don't think it is really fair to get mad about it. It may not have been the pony that was the issue but that she wanted to be held. Maybe there was good reason for her to be coerced to be on the pony. Maybe it was just introducing something new.

Either way it would depend upon the reason why my Dh was putting my child on the pony as to whether I would be upset, not just because my baby was crying and he wasn't taking her off.

**Zombie_eyes** · 28-08-2011 19:49

Im not gonna comment on that situation, missymack came up with some good points.

If anyone put my child on a pony against their will and they were geniunely fearful of the animal/ distressed etc, id be really annoyed. I'd be especially annoyed if my husband did it, other than me he is the only other person who is around the kids the most, knows their personality the most, and knows it would be going against our agreed parenting style...

**javic** · 28-08-2011 20:39

Missie,
I'm just trying to understand the logic here, not trying to be smart so please don't take it the wrong way, but what good reason could there be for making a one year old ride a pony? I get sometimes people don't want to do things and then they end up having fun, but when it's a one year old kid I think it's very different. Theres no ability to negotiate or explain. An older kid you would say "ok, let's just try it and if you don't enjoy yourself we'll stop". But this was just non negotiable. The dad just insisted. The mum asked to take her off and put their boy on instead but the dad ignored her. Now, maybe it's not my place to judge that, but I can't help that it triggered something in me and I just want to know why anyone would do that to a tiny child. So if you can explain it I might feel better about it.

**trishalishous** · 28-08-2011 21:05

if my child is distressed at ANYTHING we stop it immediately.
Hence why the 4 hr trip to Perth has taken 11 hours before.

**lulu 2** · 28-08-2011 21:08

Yes I would be annoyed if my dh forced one of our kids to do something they obviously didn't want to do and same visversa.

**nothanksbye** · 28-08-2011 21:11

meh...

there have been times that I have really really encouraged my kids to do something, only to realise with hindsight, that I pushed them into too hard.

I remember talking DS into a slide with me at Coney Island. He went up and started crying..I honestly thought he would love it once he did it, but he didnt.

I wasnt being a bad parent, probably guilty of not thinking enough...but now he does love slides..even the freefall at questacon. lol

**wrena** · 28-08-2011 21:13

I get sometimes people don't want to do things and then they end up having fun, but when it's a one year old kid I think it's very different. Theres no ability to negotiate or explain. An older kid you would say "ok, let's just try it and if you don't enjoy yourself we'll stop".

I agree

**babyspice** · 28-08-2011 21:25

Originally Posted by javic

Missie,
I'm just trying to understand the logic here, not trying to be smart so please don't take it the wrong way, but what good reason could there be for making a one year old ride a pony? I get sometimes people don't want to do things and then they end up having fun, but when it's a one year old kid I think it's very different. Theres no ability to negotiate or explain. An older kid you would say "ok, let's just try it and if you don't enjoy yourself we'll stop". But this was just non negotiable. The dad just insisted. The mum asked to take her off and put their boy on instead but the dad ignored her. Now, maybe it's not my place to judge that, but I can't help that it triggered something in me and I just want to know why anyone would do that to a tiny child. So if you can explain it I might feel better about it.

what a dodgy dad!!! dislike dislike dislike