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  1. #161
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    DJSHEARS -It is so disheartening. I am so sorry for your loss... It is baffling as to why these things happen. When I have lost past pregnancies I was comforted to know that I was able to become pregnant and 'this,' pregnancy didnt work as the pregnancy was never going to work out well, and so it was somewhat a mixed blessing. However the next one, might... Little comfort, right now, I know. This is the most difficult part of IVF, isnt it. It is too cruel.

  2. #162
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    DJSHEARS, I was so saddened to hear your news I know the pain and grief of miscarriage, and I wish I could make things different for you. My thoughts are with you and DH as you navigate this awful, painful time.

  3. #163
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    DJSHEARS, I'm so sorry for your loss. I see you've been thru this b4, but it doesn't make it any easier. Just remember that, as mammalinz said, your bub was not developing normally so nature has stepped in. I know the heartbreak you're feeling and send you so many huge hugs.
    We're all here for you to vent if you need it.

    AFM, No miracle today, as expected. Didn't even feel pregnant this time. Not really upset anymore - more numb, flat and pi55ed off. Actually relieved to be able to stop the drugs and start to feel normal again. Will be glad when nausea stops - not fair when it's not even ms. Will take a break in Jan, then final stim cycle in Feb. Will call wazza on Tue when clinic reopens - if I can get in by Feb ok, otherwise no time to wait for him... my deadline is set now.

  4. #164
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    DJshears---I'm sorry , I think a lot of us here have been through this before and know how painful it is to come so close yet so far. As if the difficulties to get that BFP is not enough.

  5. #165
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    lilwish - I am so sorry to hear you have had no miracle over the last few days. I can so get, you feeling ****ed off, flat and numb. Glad to hear youll be moving on to wazza. I think I have a script and pills for DHEA. Have to check my cupboard

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    lilwish  (04-01-2012)

  7. #166
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    Hi Ladies,
    Need some advise! I contacted my Clinic yesturday to talk to a nurse, I had some questions to ask. I had a chat to the nurse and asked what I needed to know, we got onto the subject about my age (41) and the nurse went on to say that my eggs are now OLD and that my chances of a pregnacy is quite low.... I asked the question to her should I be giving up as my age factor is against me on a successful pregnancy, she said she could not answer that but she advise me again that my eggs were getting too old and that a chance on a pregnancy was very, very low!

    We are planning to use our last frozen embryo at the begining of Feb and if this is not successful I am thinking, should we try again with one more cycle? Or is it time to give up and accept that I am what the clinic tells me too old! I am only 41 they make me sound like as if I am 65!

    Not sure how to feel any more, I don't want to give up but feel that the odds are against me. I am also afraid to give up in a way, as I feel that if I give up it will mean that it is all over on having another baby has come to an end and the sadness and thought of my last miscarriage will really get me down.

    I am struggling and unsure what I should do and trying to hang on to hope!

    Kind Regards
    Last edited by zannah; 07-01-2012 at 12:07.

  8. #167
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    Hi Zannah,

    I'm sorry you're feeling so low and worried. The nurse sounds like she was really tactless and insensitive. We know our eggs are "old" and don't need to be reminded all the time. Although the odds are against us, it doesn't mean it can't happen. Just look at all the success stories on this thread! I also have a friend who just fell preg easily and quickly at almost 43yrs - wish it was me tho.

    I certainly know how you feel about giving up. After 5 IUIs, 3 fresh IVF, 1 FET and 2 mc, we're ready to give up. We're giving it one more try. The main reasons: I feel my body has had enough, our emotions have certainly had enough, I'm sick of life being on hold "in case I'm preg", and we don't want to be too old and having our 1st child. Any dreams of having 2 are now over (unless a twins miracle happens), and dreams of having a child at all are almost over. However, this is the decision we've had to make ourselves.

    Everyone is different and has a different story. Only you can decide when it's time to give up. No nurse can decide that for you, anymore than anyone else. If you still hold that dream close to your heart, then keep going til you know in yr heart that it's time to stop.

    Sounds like you already have a little treasure to prove you can get pregnant, so if you still want to keep trying, then do it. I wish you all the luck in the world that this coming FET is a success and you don't need to make a decision anyway

  9. #168
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    Hi Zannah

    Sorry for butting in on this thread but just wanted to jump in here and say noooooooo, don't give up if YOU feel you shouldn't or you are not ready to. I would hate to think that you made the decision to give up because a nurse told you the stats are basically hopeless, and that's what they are, stats, not everyone conforms to stats.. I know lots of woman that have fallen pregnant at this age on ivf, I am one of them. It definately is harder than what it would be if you were younger but ivf is hard for anyone that has to endure it at any age. I was told time and time again that my eggs were too old and useless after starting ivf at age 38, and 12 cycles later when I was on my last cycle, my dr was trying to suggest donor eggs, I had my best ever cycle only 4 months shy off my 41st birthday and gave birth to my beautiful perfect little girl 17 months ago. I told my FS that I wasn't giving up until I got my baby and there had to be at least one golden egg in there somewhere & we were going to find it. It was only going to be my last cycle because I am a single mum by choice and chose the donor route and was on my last available batch of sperm and couldn't get anymore, it wasn't because I was ready to throw it in and I'm so glad I didn't listen to my FS. I am now thinking of trying for a sybling and I'm approaching my 43rd birthday. Yes chances will be even slimmer than what they were before but I have to at least give it a shot for my daughter's sake. If it goes pear shaped then I know it's not meant to be this time.
    Check out a thread in the ivf section called 'poor responders using DHEA etc'. I was on this medication in the latter part of my ivf journey to help improve egg quality. Without a doubt I definately saw an improvement in the quality of my embryos after starting DHEA, they became less fragmented, something I didn't think I'd see happening as I got older. I believe it was one of the things that helped me. I might also add it doesn't hurt to ask for further blood tests if you have had repeated failed cycles. I just knew in my heart that something we were unaware of (other than the fertility issues I already had) was stopping me from falling pregnant after having 2 miscarriages close together & a biochemical pregnancy, then nothing happening for several cycles later with perfect embryos. Sure enough I had ANA antibodies where my immunity was in overdrive and the anitibodies were possibly causing implantation failure. I was treated for it and on the 3rd cycle after finding this out I got pregnant.
    Also perhaps you could ask your FS about taking a low dose asprin such as Cartia for this FET or a blood thinning injection called clexane. It is believed to help with implantation. I was on both the asprin and clexane because I had implantation issues. I know alot of success stories with this too.
    Good luck

  10. #169
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    Lilwish- we posted virtually the same time & I didn't see your post. I know all too well that feeling, and you hit the nail on the head, only you know when you have had enough, I was almost at that point when I had my last cycle, it's very draining emotionally and physically, fortunately I was lucky that time. I hope your next cycle will be the one

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  12. #170
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    zannah---I totally agree with lilwish, only you can decide when you've had enough, and you have to come to that decision yourself. I once asked the Wazza if I'm stupid to keep trying (after 3 years and 7 fresh cycles, 2 FETs etc), his reply was it's never stupid, although he has said numerous times (every single consultation) that my eggs are no good and the good stock is low, but it doesn't mean the golden egg is not there, it just means it's harder to come by, and how long you keep trying depends on how much money and emotional strength you have. There are still the options of donor eggs or donor embryos as well if you would consider that.


 

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