Would you speak up?

[Fuchsia!]

i can understand that and i also feel the same way. But there are many stories out there where DOCS have intervened on innocent families and made their lives a living hell. And also the medical professionals who have reported it. So for me, I think there can be a good balance of using common sense, KNOWING and then reporting and not just jumping the gun and reporting on heresay or just a small glimpse into someones lives.

[Jakois]

Sure I can explain.

If I felt that the child was in danger of being abused I would report. If there were signs that a child was at risk, I would report.
I would not be reporting If the parents simply had different ideals to me.
Its often hard to not let your own ideas of whats right and wrong cloud your judgement.

[samsausage]

Yep, social services need a massive overhaul.

[Littlemissmetal]

Thanks for the replies

I know it's hard but it would be great if we could leave that other thread out of the picture. I'm interested in some answers and don't want this one closed.

Jakois - what would you class as genuine concerns, any example?

Blue boys - is there any example you can think of which would send you straight to DOCS?

To be honest and this may be ignorant of me, I don't really notice how strangers or people not that close to me parent, so unless I saw a child physically being beaten by their parent (or anyone actually) in public, in which i would have very strong words with the parent and alert a police officer, as how am i going to ring up DOCS and report a complete stranger
If it was a close friend and I had a bad feeling that there was neglect/abuse or anything else that could be affecting the child's well being then I would honestly try speaking to the parent, or someone closer to that person on my thoughts before acting on them, if i didn't think things were improving then I would possibly alert the appropriate authorities. I think it is really hard to say what I would do with out being in the situation, so I try to keep an open mind on what the parent could be going through as apposed to my initial judgement.

[samsausage]

I don't think it's ignorant of you at all. I'm much the same in that I don't generally take a great deal of notice of what other parents get up to.

This interests me:

If it was a close friend and I had a bad feeling that there was neglect/abuse or anything else that could be affecting the child's well being then I would honestly try speaking to the parent, or someone closer to that person on my thoughts before acting on them, if i didn't think things were improving then I would possibly alert the appropriate authorities. I think it is really hard to say what I would do with out being in the situation, so I try to keep an open mind on what the parent could be going through as apposed to my initial judgement.

I don't want it to sound like I don't care what parents are going through, I guess I just can't reconcile not reporting an instance of abuse just because mum or dad is doing it tough. Does that make sense? I certainly think any assessment of a family should always include what support can be given to the parents.

[Pinkzy]

If I was convinced a child was in danger or being abused or neglected then I'd report it in a heartbeat.

[Annabella]

I haven't read the other thread so will answer generally.

I would not report to social services unless I was pretty sure the child was in a dangerous or abusive situation. I wouldn't report on seeing an incident in a shop where a child was smacked and yelled at etc. Where I am from, mandatory reporting applies to everyone (not just health professionals and teachers etc). They can't cope with the load at all, it takes them over 18 months to follow up notifications, even on families where they have had previous notifications. They have got more funding, more staff and they just can't keep up.

If I had friends/family/neighbours that I was concerned about, and knew the whole story (ie not basing it on a one-off incident), I would try and help them access some support, talk to them about my concerns etc. If i was still concerned, I'd alert the relevant authorities.

My sil parents very different to me, and I have struggled with it. The kids used to rarely go to school, she drinks every weekend (often with them around), they eat a lot of takeaway and drink a lot of coke, their preferred method of discipline is smacking. I don't agree with a lot of their decisions, but I would never report her because although maybe their situation is not optimal, the kids are loved and are not in danger and are looked after (albeit to different standards to my own). The issue is more based on my value judgemnets than concerns for the kids' welfare if that makes sense.

[Littlemissmetal]

I don't think it's ignorant of you at all. I'm much the same in that I don't generally take a great deal of notice of what other parents get up to.

This interests me:



I don't want it to sound like I don't care what parents are going through, I guess I just can't reconcile not reporting an instance of abuse just because mum or dad is doing it tough. Does that make sense? I certainly think any assessment of a family should always include what support can be given to the parents.

Let me elaborate, I am in a pretty close circle of friends, I only really have 3 friends that have children (who are like sisters), let's say hypothetically your sister had a child and you were picking up signs of abuse would you immediately report to child services or would you try and speak to her first and offer your help, maybe she would confide in you and agree that there are some underlying issues and ask if you could then take the child for a little bit while she sorted out her problems, of course DOCS may still need to be involved but it wouldn't be the very first thing I would consider.

[samsausage]

Deleted double post

[samsausage]

Let me elaborate, I am in a pretty close circle of friends, I only really have 3 friends that have children (who are like sisters), let's say hypothetically your sister had a child and you were picking up signs of abuse would you immediately report to child services or would you try and speak to her first and offer your help, maybe she would confide in you and agree that there are some underlying issues and ask if you could then take the child for a little bit while she sorted out her problems, of course DOCS may still need to be involved but it wouldn't be the very first thing I would consider.

Ah, that makes sense. I imagine I would do as you said unless the child was in immediate danger.