Well im only 14 weeks but its already worrying me and id rather get my head around it all with a plan in place so that im just focused on a positive birth
Some background - My DS was born with my husband present and i told my family i was in labour because they insisted they wanted to know except i told them i didnt want them to come until I said and I did not want them there at the hospital while i was in labour - i discussed this before the birth too.
So half an hour after bub is born and I had just finished being stitched up (I had epesiotomy) the midwife comes in and says your family is here can they come in (I actually hadnt even told them I had the baby yet) so in my mum and two sisters come all excited because I had the baby, I hadnt even held the baby yet, hadnt gotten up to shower (which I did while they were there which was kind of embarrassing because I didnt know so much blood would pool and when I stood up went all over the floor), there all touching him and were there watching him get wiped down and dressed (with my mum being really bossy and controlling with the midwives which continued the whole time I was in the hospital - 7 days as bub had juandice and possible heart mumor - and actually caused a social worker to be called...) so i actually didnt get any time alone with my DS which 2 days later was even worse because he was sent to NICU and the only time I could hold him was when I fed him which was problematic because he was sleepy and wouldnt feed so feeding was really stressful - basically my hospital experience was really negative and I suffered awhile after with anxiety which continued a year after birth.
So this time around I dont want any visitors for atleast a few hours and the first visitor I have I just want my husband to bring our will be 3.5 year old DS to see bub and me without all the fuss being made over the baby and than if theres still time left that day (because I dont know when bub will be born!) I might have some visitors later. How do I go about telling family this? Should I just not tell them and when bub is born get DH to act as control person to who visits? I tryed telling them that I want some time alone and that the first person to visit will be DS-3.5yrs alone but than there all like oh but I can come visit right, you cant stop me visiting (not in a mean way just in a oh you wont stop me in a sad type way)
Any other people who have gone through this or soon will go through this and have found a solution? I just want to bond with my baby - it will be my last and I just want some time to marvel over how beautiful and special he/she is before all the visitors start over whelming me.