Anyone else feel ripped off (not being proposed to)?

[duckduckgoose]

Yeah London I sort of did the same. I didn't pick my own ring or anything but I did drop lots of hints and also had a weird embarrassing meltdown about it about 6 months before he did propose. I wish I'd kept my mouth shut! I know he still feels like it was his idea and a surprise which it WAS but also he probably did feel pressured, which i wish I hadn't created. But I seriously couldn't help myself and to be honest I did a damn good job after that meltdown of not nagging him anymore.

[OJandMe]

I wasn't proposed to either.

I got a few dropped hints in the weeks leading up..

and then I got a random "so.. should we buy your ring while we're here?" While out shopping one day.

so yeah.. no real proposal here either.

But he cooks me breakfast nearly every morning, and makes 98% of all the teas, coffees and snacks, and still makes regular lunch dates with me.

So I can't complain.

[miggins]

Angelski, you could always elope?!!
It's cheaper and you only need a witness, so no hassles over "who to invite". Then just have a low key celebration/party with friends/family when you return!

Ladies I am only 1 year married, but I do certainly feel for you, it would drive me insane to be in your shoes.

I hope you all get the proposals you so deserve, what's up with men???

[goosette]

I have just found the thread tailor made to me!!
I've been with DP for 12 years, since we were 17. DP is def against marriage, but thinks that having kids is greater commitment. I do agree, but I'd still like to be married. I'm not going to push it, cos it's something ge really doesn't want. We did choose a commitment ( non engagement) ring two months ago- but it's still in the drawer! Bah! I wouldn't want to force him into anything he doesn't want to do though. I was super happy when he agreed to ttc.
He did come up with the idea of a commitment ceremony, so i'll get the ring, change my name etc, so we're making the public commitment - having a wedding without the marriage I guess. Not a bad compromise. I was happy he thought of that.

[mylittlefamily]

I'm madly in love with DH but he is REALLY unmotivated. If it was up to him he'd still be living in a share house with a milk crate for a coffee table (not quite, but you get my drift). My problem is that he didn't propose to me. I had a great idea for a wedding and said "Let's get married" to which he replied "I'll think about it" . I love him more than the sun and moon and stars and I know I should get over it but I feel sooooo ripped off and hurt. I'm kinda jealous when I see other people's engagement rings or hear the way their boyfriends proposed. I know in the grand scheme it's probably insignificant, but I wonder if there's anyone else out there that feels the same as me?

hmm maybe I didnt read this properly... I suppose i "Did" get proposed to.. sort of...
Our second Anniversary was coming up, i went to check the mail at the Post Office (PO Box) and there was a little yellow parcel from eBay China, customs declaration was on the outside with "engagement ring" and worth 99c !!!! I left it in there and said for days that I hadnt checked the mail ( DH knows i do religiously !) Dont think he ever realised ? Anyway it was 5am on the day (19th March 2008) and i gave him his present and then when he was to give me mine he just handed me the envelope !!!! and they had sent the wrong size !! (I found out he actually HAD ordered the correct size!) I said I wasnt going to say yes till he got on one knee We went and chose a ring together the next weekend.
I was just lucky that he was home on our Anniversary!! (he works away, randomly)

[Missy14]

It's hurtful isn't it? I'm so glad I've got others to share this with. Angelski, (and everyone for that matter) I would suggest that you propose to him (and tell him that it'll all fall into place -- which it most certainly will) but I was the one that (very loosely) proposed to DH and even after 6 years of a beautiful marriage I still feel completely ripped off.

I don't think there's an answer . We've just gotta suck it up. And come on here to whinge

Something I've been seriously considering... Proposing to DP!! Even came up with quite a creative way to do it but just can't seem to get the guts! Grrr! I feel like I'd be taking something away from him in a way (Sigh) It's funny though, cause at the start of our relationship when we spoke about the possibility of getting married he said that I'd probably be the one to ask him, just cause that's who I am and that I'd wanna get married on the 29th of February just to be different lmao!!

[Taralotus]

I'm married but neither of us proposed to the other 

Back in august 2006 we were starting the international adoption process and when we went to drop off the papers at the adoption office we were asked for our marriage certificate.

We had just assumed that as long as we got hitched before we went to Thailand to bring our baby home it would be ok and nothing in the paperwork said otherwise.

Wrong! Looking at each other we just said "we had better get married then!" and POOF, we were engaged! We got the wedding organized in one weekend and were married three months later.

To answer the original question, nope I don't feel ripped off at not being proposed to in the usual fashion.

Both of us have been married before and our idea of 'romance' is not the traditional idea at all.

Each relationship should be unique, not a copy of what most people consider 'normal', even in a small way.

It's more important to think about your relationship and do what is 'normal' and unique to you as a couple.



Due 26 Sep 2011
Clomid baby conceived after only one course
 Mummy is 36 yrs + Daddy is 47 yrs

[PinUpBec]

i have the opposite 'problem' actually. my dp proposes to me a lot but without a ring and i always say no cos 1. ive been married before and 2. i want a ring, lol! plus i want him to mean it. he kinda just throws it around.

[Von Zipper]

This is sooooo the thread for me haha

I kind of pressured DF into it... We had been together for 3 years and would always say things like "When we get married" etc and then while we were on holiday in Port Lincoln, we visited a winery and they had a wedding there the next day and were setting up so DF started talking to the lady about weddings there and asked to see some more info.

Later that day, we were having some wine in the bath and I told him he had to ask me and so he did. Then the next day we picked a ring.

I do wonder whether he would have done it himself now. But oh well, too late. God knows when we'll end up getting married...! Might just change my name by deed poll

[CheekyMonkey1]

There wasn't really a proposal here either, however I wouldn't change it for the world.

We had talked about getting married and I told him that when I finished my 2nd uni degree that it was time to get married. We set a very loose wedding date for the following year and then didn't talk about it for about 6 months! By this stage we had been together for 8 years.

After that 6 months we were outside weeding the garden and DH said to me " I reckon we should tell our parents we are getting married." Both sets we coming to visit us in the next couple of weeks.

I was stoked and shocked. My reply was "does that mean we can buy a ring?"

I still tease him now about never actually proposing but I loved it and I have the most amzing ring (and husband) ever!