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  1. #61
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    Wishmeluck - so sorry to hear about the donor list. That really sux. It's a shame you can't come east, as I had no trouble getting straight in for a donor. In fact, I had 37 white anglo saxon donors to choose from. Shame my ovaries aren't playing ball Fingers crossed you get your thyroid issue sorted out too.

    Just on the overseas donors - is anyone else using this option? My FS said to me this isn't a good option because we don't know much about the clinic or the testing that goes on overseas. Anyone have more knowledge?

    AFM, I've been laying a bit low. Trying not to spend 24/7 on BH

    and to all.

  2. #62
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    Wish - I hope you can join the August thread. Im really sorry about the donor list, plain sux . I didnt have to wait either, but there is a shortage of donors in Vic. I really hope there is a way for you to access the sperm sooner. Your right, they only use one single sperm in each egg for ICSI, and the quality of the sperm doesnt have to be as good as for 'normal' IVF as the little guys dont need to swim to get to the egg. you get your sperm soon hunny!! Could you ask your FC if you could import some sperm from an interstate clinic?

    Wishing - I hope the meditation helps, dont worry about feeling silly walking in with your pillow and blankey, just take heart that your not the only one!! Great news about your thyroid, you must be relieved. Im sure this cycle will be ok for you, 3rd time lucky I think .
    I cant access O/S sperm as Victoria doesnt allow it anymore, but I probably would have used O/S sperm if I could have as you get more of a choice and looking at the web site for sperm donors in USA you get a lot more information on the donor and sometimes even pictures. I would think that their testing etc would be up to standard, at least for the larger major clinics in the USA, its a huge business over there. But in saying that I have no idea of course, I could be wrong !! Wow, 37 donors to choose from is great, I didnt get that many - shortage of donors in Victoria.

    Ahhhh, hate this wating!! Come on AF and come on July!!

  3. #63
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    Hi there single ladies

    Like you WishingHoping, I've been trying not to spend 24/7 on BH! I think some of my excitement waned after I was told about the longer wait. Still, when I call in July they may have some better news! Sorry I didn't get back to you about the overseas donor bit. When I looked into it, it was a definite no from my Fertility Clinic, but also would be from all other Clinics in WA too. I'm not sure if other States have different laws or not, but for WA, it's illegal to transport human tissue across the State border or into WA from overseas. The laws are on the Reproductive Technology Council website for WA and essentially because overseas clinics can't guarantee that the donor won't donate to more than 5 recipients, they won't import it. I'm not sure how they know that they won't, but I'm figuring they're erring on the side of caution. The overseas clinic would also have to provide all of the information on the donor for release to the child when they turn 16/18 as is required here in WA - ie no anonymous donors even from overseas! So no chance of importing from interstate or overseas darnit! I'm heading to Melbourne again late July and did think about taking my mini eski with me I wonder how JetStar would class that as cabin baggage?

    Hey Sugarberry how are you going? Has AF shown up yet?? You must be getting sooooo excited now, not long now.

    WishingHoping - have your ovaries decided to play ball yet? I'm sure you're also going to get another shot at this IVF malarky in July!!!

    Good luck I'll just be cooling my heels!

  4. #64
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    Hi WishMeLuck – LOL re your cabin baggage! Thanks for making me laugh – been a low week, this one. Shame you can’t have special “cabin baggage” from overseas. I think the laws here in Vic might be slightly different, as I’ve seen application forms for “importing” embryos, though I’m not really sure.
    AFM – I got blood test results back from FS last week. She rang me quite late one evening and told me quite casually: "oh, you're probably going through menopause". WTF???? Apparently my FSH and LH are sky high - which yes, could be menopause (though I have no other symptoms), but it could also be my thyroid messing things around again, or a hangover from the last cancelled cycle. Needless to say I was hysterical, and have been pretty flat ever since. My GP and my acupuncturist were both horrified at the callous way she told me this (esp when it doesn’t even make sense). I’m seeing another FS this week for a second opinion.
    to everyone else and and to all.

  5. #65
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    WishingHoping - OMG! I can't believe she was so casual in the way that she mentioned that. May the fleas of a thousand camels infest her own nether regions. I work with doctors and although many of them are brilliant, I can't believe how some can so casually mention things that have a significant impact on people's lives. I think they've forgotten that just because they may have to distance themselves a little to do what they have to do for a living, doesn't mean that they get to completely disengage with humanity! Anyway my BH friend, I hope you get a much better explanation with your second opinion. Increased FSH and LH is only one indicator and even those hormones fluctuate each month as we all know! And also, if it was all over Red Rover because of increased FSH, many women on this thread wouldn't have the babies they do now! Hang in there, and let me know how you get on I think you can probably tell from the number of exclamation marks in my post that I'm ****ed off on your behalf.

  6. #66
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    Wish - definately bring you little cooler to Melbs, Im sure you could sneak some little swimmers home !! It must be frustrating for you sweets, but Im really hoping your still able to go in August , which isnt too far away really.

    Nope , no AF for me, I think its going to be late as i spoke with my FS on Friday and she said not to be surprised if its about 2 weeks late as that is the norm following a miscarriage. Its fine, but I wish she had of told me that weeks ago!! I did get the results back from all those BT's she did over 3 weeks ago (for clotting issues etc) and they all came back clear which is good.

    Wishing - What was wrong with that doctor!! How horrible to say something like that in that way, I probably would have hit them and then burst into tears!! I hope the second opinion gives you a completely different result.

  7. #67
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    Hi everyone, just a quick one from me.

    I saw the new FS earlier this week and it seems the original FS was probably right. Apparently my body has decided it's time to stop doing it's thing, albeit somewhat prematurely. He recommended I go the donor route. I can't tell you how upset I am. Totally shattered, really. I'm trying to process it all, but it's just overwhelming and I can't really get my head around any of it.

    Good luck to everyone. Lots of for you. I'll try to pop back for personals another time. Take care all.

  8. #68
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    WishingHoping - I am so so sorry to hear what you're going through and I can understand not being able to get your head around what you've been told. We spend our lives anticipating growing up, getting married and having a baby and when it doesn't happen it's about letting go of that longheld dream which can be incredibly painful. I noticed a thread the other day with another lady going through exactly through the same thing and it filled me with dread. As each month goes by, I'm also wondering what my hormones are up to and when my time will be up. But, I will still keep my fingers crossed for you that your body may have one last surprise for you and that you manage to achieve your dream. I know the Centre for Human Reproduction website is known as the place of last resort and they specialise in women in your position. I don't know if you've read their website, but that may give you some hope. I can also understand that thinking about an egg donor is a whole other ball game. I'll be thinking of you and please make contact if you want to. Take good care of you. and some babydust because you just never ever know!

  9. #69
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    Wishing - I wrote to you in our July thread, but again just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear your news, completely devistating for you sweets . Its such over-whelming news to get your head around and I completely understand how upset and shattered you must be feeling right now . Take all the time you need hunny, and we are here for you if you need us. If you do decide to go down the donor route, I wish you all the success in the world .

    Wish - I hope you ok, any more news on the donor list as yet?

  10. #70
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    Default Single and using a sperm donor

    Hi all- I remember what many of you are going through, and would only say keep going, its worth it.
    You might find this useful for the future; free stories for donor conceived childlren, to use as starting points (can I put links in this?). I better not- but go to facebook and the page is /DIYBaby. The link is near the top.
    I think the link to the Donor Dad Questionnaire is also there that we used- questions you child is likely to want to know (created by children with The Child Listener) - eg My favourite colour, what Im most proud of, what subject I hated at school, what I want for you growing up etc. Of course to do that youll need to find a donor yourself, so you can find out as much info as possible - and many now want to be known to the child from birth and are happy to meet the child when/ if they want. Through a clinic you only get info at 18. Its why I actually didnt choose a donor through a clinic. There are many sites to use to find a donor privately- and they will all donate for free. The only one that is strictly AI only - and doesnt allow for anonymous- is FSDW - most others allow for NI (sex) even if they dont encourage it. Which no-one should- so unsafe. I also chose this route as I didnt have the $1000 - $2000 per cycle- when you can take months to fall pregnant. But everyone has to choose whats right for them. Certainly with the info around now about children and how they want to know a lot about their biological father even if not actually raising them, I think we have to try to become parents with what the child will want in mind. Can be difficult to do that with limited options- but I guess I wanted to share that there arent. There are about 500 AU donors registered with FSDW and although there are no guarantees at least you arent out of pocket thousands if you dont catch straight away. You can get his tested privately- or choose him there and then ask him to donate to a clinic. Most clinics are fine with that. And then use the same Donor Dad for sibblings so they are all fully related. A friend of mine is doing that- she has chosen her donor and they are now doing everything else at a clinic. She is staying in touch with him though- and although the donor wont have parental rights she wants him to be able to know how the child is doing, and let them meet when the child is old enough to know if thats what they want.
    Hope thats helpful- baby hugs to everyone.
    J xxx


 

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