Little niggling worries.....

[heeeeerekittykitty]

I've got lots of random worries floating around in this head of mine so instead of starting a heap of threads I thought I'd just roll them into one :-)

Any advice or opinions on them would be much appreciated .

* my almost 6 week old DD is not smiling yet . She interacts with her eyes , looks at me , around the room etc but no smiles . DS was smiling galore at this age . And about 5-6 people including the health nurse have said to me " bet she's smiling heaps ??" ahhh , no she's not :-( should I be concerned ?

* DS 16 months doesn't talk at all . Babbles, understands some things , but no words . Again , alot of my family are saying to him ," why aren't you talking yet , you should be by now ?" just need some reassurance as he absolutely falls short of what he apparently "should " be doing according to dumb guidelines that do your head in :-(

* lastly , DD still has yet to wake up to the world . Doesn't cry , just eats and sleeps and when awake for extremely short periods just observes like a little angel . She's so placid compared to how DS was at almost 6 weeks , he was sooooo interactive with me . Anyone elses babies like this at 6 weeks and take awhile to warm up so to speak ?

Thanks and sorry if they seem silly but theyre not silly to me :-D

[naomi83]

I can't help with the 16mo issues as my DS is 11 months, but he didn't smile until 9 weeks. He was also very placid and sleepy until 10 or so weeks. I too was worried, but now he is SO active and full of energy.

I honesty wouldn't worry about your perfect little DD at all. Enjoy this time xx

[babylove81]

Aww love!

No advice, but sending some GBH your way!!

From memory it seemed like DD didn't smile forever either... and for the first 6 weeks of her life she screamed, so enjoy this time with your DD, it goes so fast!

All of your worries are completely normal, and very important, but you know what, your kids sound completely normal too... remember your DS has had a big change what with getting a new baby sister and all, and he may just be taking it all in. And your darling DD, I'm betting is just a completely opposite personality to your DS and what you are used too... You have also gone through a big change, from having 1 cherub (who was and is your world 24/7) to having 2 cherubs (who are now both your world and your life 24/7)! You and your family are allowed to go through a period of adjustment!

The biggest bit of advice I can give you, is something a very good friend told me when my DD was very young ~ "The word 'should', is NEVER allowed to be found in a new mother's vocabulary". Your baby should be doing this... or that... or the other... pfft... if your DD is alert, feeding well, sleeping well (my neighbour's newborn slept 6 hours during the day, compared to my newborn doing 45 minutes), interacting (in her own way) and gaining weight, she is doing perfectly! In saying that however, trust your mummy instinct and don't second guess yourself. Your children are your own and unique in everyway, you know them better than anyone!

My DD is 15 months old and only has 4 teeth! I'm starting to freak out and contemplating taking her to the dentist, LOL...

You are doing a fantastic job with your DS and DD and I have no doubt that they are both doing beautifully as well... remember, you are their mum, its your job to worry!

PM me if you want to 'talk' anymore... in the meantime...

A.
xx

[heeeeerekittykitty]

Thx ladies So so much , it's hard not to worry about little things !

Naomi - very reassuring to gets your DS smiled at 9 weeks and was also sleepy !

Baby love - thx for your lovely post and kind words !! Wow I love that piece if advice about " shoulds" . That word alone can send you nuts constantly thinking should should should should SHOULD!!! Grrr :-)

[kar]

Smiling - apparently 9/10 wks is still totally normal
Sleepy head - my dd was the dream baby until 5 weeks then all he'll broke loose, enjoy it lol.
Talking - no advice, but if he has no words at all I would probably get a check up. Having said that a friends son has only a couple of words at 18 mths, but babbled, had clear comprehension etc and they've been told not to sweat it but also to encourage him to talk with words rather than gestures by not immediately responding to his pointing, gesturing etc to encourage him to use words.

[grumpybump]

I also think it's pretty normal not to smile at 6 weeks, my DS had given me the odd one here or there at 6 weeks but didn't really give me nice smiles until about 9 or 10 weeks. In terms of her being very placid - she has no reason to cry unless she needs something, so I would just take it that you're meeting her needs so sounds like you're doing a great job! She sounds like a lovely dream baby.

Your DS not talking, the fact that he has comprehension and is babbling sounds okay but I agree with Kar that it might be worth talking to the CHN or GP about a possible referral. There probably isn't a problem but they might be able to give you some tips on ways to encourage words.

A really good example is that my 20 mth old had loads of words but just seemed unable to join them. I read somewhere that whever they said a word, like "car", you should say something like "red car". I found that when he said a word I would just repeat it approvingly and then say something like "clever boy, great talking!" so I wasn't actually modelling for him how to string two words together. Within two days of me doing this he was joining words and his ability to make sentences went through the roof!

Sorry, I know that tip doesn't help your situation but it just shows how adopting simple strategies and modelling age appropriate talking can have a big effect.

Also remember that often our kidlets don't do things gradually, but often can just suddenly do things. So your DS will probably go from no words to ten words in the space of a week .