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  1. #981
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    Congratulations Country and welcome to the world Callan enjoy your baby gazing honey xoxo

    rach : I hope everything goes well tonight hun so you can bring beautiful M home cant wait to see some pictures.

    Digby : I feel your pain is it only when you put z in her baissinette ? it maybe reflux hun that is what was happening to C along with upchucks worth checking out hun.

    Lisa : It would be very hard leaving C everyday but it sounds like you are doing what is best for your family financially as I think it could be stressful if you had to worry about money all the time and it is a personal choice weather you want to be sahm or go back to work and we all have our reasons for our decisions.

  2. #982
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    Liv.....I could be wrong but I don't think it's reflux as she brings up wind (both ends beautifully) & hardly ever vomits. Also she will fall asleep after I have fed her lying down in my bed, she then often stays asleep in the bassinet (sometimes for 10 mins or more, sometimes less) until she realizes she's not in our bed or no longer being nursed. It's also tricky (sometimes) to get her to sleep in the first place as she fights it. This is all in the evening, day time she's a perfect sleeper & sleeps in her bassinet no worries. Yesterday morning she slept in her bassinet from 8.30-12.30 WTF?? Why can't she do that at night. Normally I will wake her after 3 hours in the morning & in the afternoon 2.5hours I'll wake her. So I don't think it's reflux otherwise she'd be hard to get to sleep in the bassinet during the day also I'd imagine but I could be wrong. Is vomiting always a sign of reflux or is there such a thing of silent reflux? I'd hate to be missing it. I think she maybe just a fullon baby, Im seeing it now a bubs that walks too early. DH was walking at 9 months and hardly slept. She's been able to hold her head fully on her belly since 3 weeks (who knows she may have been able to earlier but because of her broken arm we couldn't give her belly time until it was healed and splint off. Even with the broken arm she was trying to roll & on her belly she's been (trying) commando crawling from 3 weeks also. Obviously she doesn't get anywhere but she's got the movement right so thinking she may just be a fullon little rascal like her dad apparantly was lol! If I don't laugh I'll cry. DH was apparently a terrible sleeper until he started school, yikes!!! I don't want that mummy will not be able to function at work!

  3. #983
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    Back again just had to swap from phone to laptop as Iphone is very slow this morning, giving me nothing but trouble.

    Lady..... I'm so sorry your feeling pulled at the momment between wanting to work but also missing your lil man so much. Anyone who gives you grief about working fulltime with little C can get stuffed. I hope noone is giving you a hard time about it as it's really none of there business and TBH some people have an opinion and too quick to judge other mums no matter what they do. eg.....giving you crap if you deceide to be a SAHM, give you crap if you deceide to work part time (meaning you could work more, or getting crap for working fulltime and too much. So really, you can't win and its really no one elses business as to what you or anyone chooses to do in regards to this topic and theres definatly no right or wrong as everyones situation is different. I hope your able to chat to your boss and if you really want that one day off a fortnight (I think it was) I hope your able to come up with an agreement.
    For me I had to go back when E was 6 months old and it wasnt long and I was working 30 hours a week, then by the time she was 3 I was working fulltime. I absolutly hated it and missed her like crazy but for me I was a single mum from when she was only 6 weeks old (thank goodness she slept better then Z lol) anyway the only way I could get ahead and save a deposit to buy a home was to work. It was a huge sacrifice but looking back if I didn't do it I wouldn't be where I am today. It didn't effect E at all, kids cope very well having parents that work a lot but it did effect me, missing her so much and also resenting my parents for what it seemed they got more time with her as I sometimes felt like all I ever did was work. Through guilt and missing her so much I hardly went out socially unless it included her, thankfully I had and still have wonderful friends who understood my position as a single mum and they would visit me so I wasn't away from E more than I had to be and I could keep her in routine. This time round though my situation is so very different. I will be going back to work next year in Feb but hoping to only work 2-3 fulldays per week. I would love to have longer off but I don't mind having to go back. Financially we are classified as "low income earners" but as where no in huge debt we should be ok financially, it will just mean making sacrifices but for me I'd rather that than be earning more and go through what I had to go through with E working so much and missing so many milestones. E is loving me being home also and I don't want to be home more just for Z but also for E as I can do it (just) this time round as before I had no choice. Also for me working 2-3 days a week is a nice break socially for me and I also beleive it's good for a childs development to be left with other people. I'm lucky I won't have to use day care as I have my mum but I do beleive day care is fantastic for kids to gain confidence and social skills and interaction. I had E in day care twice a week from when she was 15 months old and it was great for her. The only reason I won't be using d/care this time round is because the money I would use for d/care I want to save in a bank account to help with Zahlis school fees in five years time. It's the only way we can afford for our girls to go to private schools with me only working part time. I did used to find when E was at kindy/early primary school years some mums did look down on me for working fulltime but what bloody choice did I have unless I was going to be just a single mum living on benefits and not having my own home (well a mortgage anyway) I didn't want to bring her up thinking you can get pregnant as a single mum and not have to work and I much preferred to be earning my own money.

    Winzy...I hope all of this and the feedback from others also helps you with your decision. It's a very tough one and it seems a bit wrong you don't have longer to make a decision. Just know theres no right or wrong answer and you can only do what works for yourself and DH both financially and emotionally. Whatever decision you go with O will be fine, you just need to make sure that you will be fine also (if that makes sense) And for now enjoy being on m/leave and being there for O fulltime.

    I'll just mention another scenario for both winzy and lady.....my sister has 2 kids a 5 year old and a 7 year old and also pregnant. (currently she's on m/leave) but before that she has worked fulltime since both her kids were very little. She's a high school teacher and quite high up in leadership. She's on very good money but also so is her husband. They can live very comfortably on his income alone and my sister is in the position that if she never wanted to work again she could do just that and she is also not a money hungry person BUT very career minded and works for the love of it not the money. She loves her kids dearly but the thought of being a SAHM is the last thing she would want to do and knows for her she's a better mum by working. She is a fantastic mum and the time she is home with them (after school and weekends) she and her husband both focus on the kids (there family) and having both parents working fulltime works for them, always has and hasn't effected the kids in the slightest. Don't get me wrong, she's enjoying the break from work atm and will most likely not go back to work until bubs #3 is 10 months old or so and she won't go back fulltime this time round but once child #3 is older most definatly, so I guess what I'm saying is for some people it's not even about the money. (I'd love to be in my sisters position and be a SAHM longer and only work 1 day per week) but that's where myself and my sister differ. Only difference is DH is on less than half what her hubby is on so for me it's about finances, for others it's about career and for others also.

    All the best with your decision Winzy and hugs to you Lady. Your a fantastic mum and C is so lucky to have you as his mummy, you just need to follow your heart and do what makes you happy. Remember a happy mum is a HAPPY BABY!!


    Sorry for such a long post, well done top anyone who got through it without falling asleep lol!!!

    ps off to mothers group this morning and the topic is sleep. Thank goodness for that I need all the advice I can get atm lol!! Although I feel and look like crap I'm loving every second with my Baby Z and being home atm and being there for my beautiful 12 year old E Being a fulltime housewife I'm finding is harder somedays then being at work (for me) but for now I just hope Feb next year doesn't come around too quick.

  4. #984
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    Lisa -not sure if my post about working was understood or nit - i do actually plan to work part time throught he week when the twins are a bit older - maybe 2 or 3 days - the otehr days will be spent running around after them or keeping things in check at home - unfortunately i think day naps for me are a thing of the past for now....i dont know of any full time mums with school age kids who have that luxury - an 'easy' day for me now consists of at least 3 if not 4 loads of washing - 3 kids is hard work!! As for your job - well i guess its hard if you need the job for the money as you cant 'negotiate' on much - as in you wouldnt want to set hours etc only to have it rejected and have your job on the line if that makes sense. I used to work for someone when i began IVF who was not at all flexible with my hours - i quit - simple! I knew i wanted a family more than a job so i left. I understand your desire to work for your boss and to keep her happy - i know that pit of your stomach feeling of feeling like you are letting someone down.....You do what you want but it seems liek if you go with 9 days you will feel crap towards your boss, and if you do full tiem hours you will feel that way toward charlie- for me (and please dont think i am judging cause im not, this is purely my opinion) i coulndt handle feeling that guilt towards my kids, your boss wont be there forever but C will...also, how will you feel towards your boss when you miss C walking, saying 'mum' etc - would you resent her for not being negotiable with your hours??? I guess what im trying to say is that there are other jobs out there that would be flexible enough to allow you some time with charlie and to still pay the bills - i get that you have a lovely workplace and work with what sound like great people, but how does that weigh up against what you could potentially miss with C? Just food for thought - at the end of the day we all do what we think is the right thing by everyone in our lives and sometimes forget about us - so forget your boss, and even forget C just for the minute, and think about what YOU want - i dont envy your position, i hope you get it sorted soon xx

  5. #985
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    Morning, myer has 50% off already reduced stock ATM. Went to ttp yesterday & stocked up on size one clothes for Z's next years winter w/drobe. There was still quite alot there so thought I'd share if anyones interested. I'm sure there would of been some bargains in the ladies wear but it's funny how we always end up buying for the kids & not ourselves. Lol! Didn't even get time to look for myself. Also pumpkin patch have great specials also ATM, went there too & stocked up!

    AFM......my lovely mum slept over last night so I could catchup on some Zzzz's. Would you believe it, I gave Zahli a feed round 9.15pm then put her in her bassinet at 10pm & she didn't wake as she normally does and actually slept until 4am. Mum then gave her a bottle (which she drank the whole 120mls) had a bit of trouble settling her but once in her bassinet she didn't pick her up, just put her hand on her belly & she eventually went back to sleep and slept for another 2 hours! Now here comes the dilemma & would really appreciate some advice/feedback....
    Zahli has a bed in her nusery which is where mum slept & so I put the bassinet which is kept in my room beside my side of the bed. Both times mums stayed over she has slept in the nursery with Zahli having the bassinet moved down there also and both times slept really well. Now last night I wrapped her & put her in the bassinet and had success first time round. Where thinking maybe she settles there better than in our room as she's quite cunning & either smells me? Or/and wants to be in our arms/bed as she's in our room. Now should I just move her into the nursery as we do have a baby monitor or should I try the lounge room as it's closer to our b/room as the kids rooms are down the other end of the house or do I keep her in our room but change positioning of the bassinet so she's not next to my side of the bed. The only reason I'm a bit unsure as to whether I should take her out of my room is because SIDS reccomend the first 6 months in parents room & she's only 7 weeks old. What should I do?
    Sorry for such a long explanation

  6. #986
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    Digby: their is a thing called silent reflux lol

    I had cooper in his nursery from the day he got home with my anglecare monitor (love that) the reason that we did that is cause they are so noisy when they sleep and heaps of my friends have had trouble putting them in their own room when time came with the sid recommendations they are only recommendation and you need to do what is best for your baby we had heaps of settling issues with cooper as well as the reflux in the beginning so I was very nervious doing it but it has worked out better I put cooper in his cot at 8 weeks and he started to sleep so much better you have to do what is comfortable for you have you got a single bed that you can put in her room while you do the transition ? Just an idea.

    also when is lunch agin forgot to put it in my calendar and where ???

    I will be back latter to read up and fill you all in what is happening with mini c

  7. #987
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    Country...hope all is going really well for you & bubs xx

    Liv....lunch is next Tues at Fellini cafe nrth ad (across from cinemas) at 12pm. I will book over the weekend just waiting to see who else is coming. So far yourself,Lulusmum,winzy & I think Kiwi was interested but don't think she's been back on to see the details. If anyone else would like to come your all more than welcome, just let me know xx

    Liv, yep there's a single bed in her room also. That's why mum slept in there last night. I don't think I'll be able to sleep in there as it may be the same as her sleeping in my room and smelling the milk. I'd get DH to but not going to even ask he will say no as it would mean getting up to her during the night which is (my job) as he has to go to work. Mind you I still do the majority even when he has the day off (apart from this fault he is a fantastic dad to both our girls just not very helpful in the sleep dep dept) I can imagine what everyone is thinking lol!!

    The CAYHS nurse at mothers group yesterday has booked us in for sleep school for the 8th. Even if her sleep continues to be good I'll still go. Chances are last night was just a fluke like last time because my mum was there lol!

    Anyway I (think) I will try having Zahli in the nursery tonight.

  8. #988
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    Hi all,

    CONGRATULATIONS COUNTRY & DH ON THE SAFE ARRIVAL OF YOUR LITTLE MAN!
    Hope your recovery from the c-section is a speedy one. Enjoy baby gazing.

    Lisa - I hope no one is making you feel bad about returning to work. Geez, Mums' can't win, no matter what we do. Think of the positives, C enjoys CC, you enjoy your job, money pays the mortgage etc..... If you really feel you're missing out, could you get a new job with less hrs but similar money??? At the end of the day C has 2 great parents who love him to bits and that's what counts.

    Digby - I would def try Z in her own room, maybe you guys are disturbing her? for tonight. Can I make a last minute decision about Tues? Sam has Occ care that morning and I'm still deciding whether he'll be up to it with only a quick nap in the car. I'll get back to you over the weekend.

    LM - Washing, arrgghhh!!!!!!!!!! It NEVER ends............. I hate washing, it takes up a huge part of my day!

    Sorry can't go back far, forgotten stuff already! Have P home sick, about to ice cake for MIL, she's 60 today and just been discharged from hos. All going there for pot luck tea. I'm cheating and taking a bucket of KFC.

  9. #989
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    M's home!

  10. #990
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    Rach....that's fantastic, hope she settles in well & you all get a good nights sleep xx


 

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