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  1. #341
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesca77 View Post
    Worlds worst mummy day over here.

    Our lovely postie often hand delivers our mail to the door, so DS1 can go toot the horn on his bike. We were upstairs today when he arrived, I had a sick DS2 in my arms, so asked DS1 to follow me 'quick quick' down the stairs.

    I get to the front door and all I hear is 'thump thump thump' - he'd slipped and rolled down the stairs I got to him before he hit the floorboards at the bottom thank god, but I feel so incredibly guilty. It could have happened any day, but the fact the very first time was after me telling him to hurry up makes me feel terrible. He's been going up and down on his own for a year with no accidents, so I didn't even think about it.

    He's ok, he cried more out of shock I think and only had a very small red mark on his nose, but still....bad mummy.
    Nawwww hugs Pesca. Not a bad mummy at all

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    Pesca77  (07-08-2013)

  3. #342
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    My beautiful 7 month old dd resulted after 5 years and 5 ivf cycles and is my heaven and earth. She is also hard work, she doesn't sleep day or night and hates to be left alone to play EVER. I got so frustrated with her whinging and crying today that 3 times, before 12 o clock, I had to put her in her cot and let her cry while I went out the front and got some fresh air. I just couldn't take her any more.
    I hate myself for feeling like that.

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  4. #343
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grebbeci View Post
    My beautiful 7 month old dd resulted after 5 years and 5 ivf cycles and is my heaven and earth. She is also hard work, she doesn't sleep day or night and hates to be left alone to play EVER. I got so frustrated with her whinging and crying today that 3 times, before 12 o clock, I had to put her in her cot and let her cry while I went out the front and got some fresh air. I just couldn't take her any more.
    I hate myself for feeling like that.

    Sent from my GT-I9100 using The Bub Hub mobile app
    I recall doing exactly the same thing with my DS1.It feels awful at the time,but honestly the best thing to do is leave them somewhere safe and just walk away for a bit.You did the right thing

  5. #344
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    Quote Originally Posted by mama and her little bear View Post
    That is being a good mum hun, you recognised you had reached frustration levels so removed yourself from the situation.

    Crying briefly in a safe environment while mummy takes a breath will not hurt your little one, a mummy loosing the plot and snapping may even accidentally hurt them.
    Agreed Grebbeci if it makes you feel any better Im pretty sure most of us here can admit to having to put bub in a safe place to regroup. I did this with DS on more than one occasion and it was always so I could scream into a pillow or bawl my eyes out. Yes at the time I felt like the ****test mum out there but it was either that or lose my mind.

    You do what you need to do to gather yourself...mummies need a break too If anything this thread helped me realise I wasnt the big monster I had made myself out to be. I think we all just need a big hug and to forgive ourselves for our moments of weakness..we aren't super human. You are doing a wonderful job Grebbeci

    And Pesca do not beat yourself up.. accidents happen and this certainly Isn't something you should blame yourself for! Xoxo
    Last edited by Purple Lily; 07-08-2013 at 21:01.

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    IncyWincy  (07-08-2013),Pesca77  (07-08-2013)

  7. #345
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    Thanks ladies, I know it was the rot thing to do, but I just hate that I feel like that, I shouldn't.

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  8. #346
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    I feel like I'm being a good mum but in the process of being the best mum I can, I feel like I'm being a crap family member. SIL has just had a baby as well and my DP desperately wants to go to QLD to meet his nephew but DD has reflux and is horrible when out of routine so the idea of going anywhere makes me cringe majorly.

    The majority of my family live in the hunter/Sydney area and they haven't met 3 month old DD for the same reason and now one of my sisters is going through a horrible time and I desperately want to go see her and cheer her up but it means travelling with DD. So I feel like me and DD are holding everyone back but then I feel bad like I'm blaming it on her. I know it's not her fault but it's just so hard!

    Why must parenthood come with such a huge helping of guilt over every aspect of life?

  9. #347
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    Today just for a second I wished I'd never had kids. I felt sick to my stomach thinking it but im struggling with a 5yr old whose a perfect angel at school but a nightmare at home, a 3yr old with spd and a 8 week old with severe reflux and colic who cries all the time. Im emotionally, mentally and physically exhausted.

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  10. #348
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    Peanut monkey I hope this are a bit better for you today. DD1 was reflux baby and I know how hard it can be, let a alone with 2 older kids to look after too. Hugs.

    Things this week have been a bit calmer and quieter thank god! Although today I am in a foul mood because I have no time to myself for weeks and its starting to get me. With DH mum so sick he is either asleep, at the hospital or at work, which I totally support and understand but it doesn't mean it easy on me or the girls. Just so over everything.

  11. #349
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    Hey Greb, don't be too hard on yourself, there comes a time when your limit is reached and due to the lack of sleep you've both been getting its completely understandable.

    If it helps Ive put ds in his cot stepped out of his room and yelled the house down, which only shocked ds and made him cry more, scared the dog and then we spent the rest if the afternoon crying together.

    Your doing such a wonderful job and on the amount if sleep your on, I take my hat off to you, your one hell of a mumma xx

    Did you call tricilian back?

  12. #350
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    I'm sitting here rocking my 6th month old in his second cycle of sleep crying, I'm a horrible horrible person. I did something I swore I would never ever do and omg I can't believe it.

    Last night my ds woke up at 11, (1st of 3 wake ups) screaming as he has for the last few weeks, I put him on the change table as he is constantly wetting thru nappies and his screaming got worse, I grabbed his shoulders and kind of did a little shake, more so to snap him out if it, it was for 2 seconds, and not that rough. I am so disgusted with myself, I feel the lowest of the low, I love this little boy so much and I can't believe I was even capable of this. How dare I touch my child like that, how f@$king dare I.

    I'm going to ring my Dr when ds wakes and get an increase on my depression meds as clearly I'm starting to get PND. I just wish I could rely on my mother to look after ds without me there, or MIL was able to help but she is busy with my ill SIL, I feel so alone and just want some time to myself that doesn't involve cleaning, cooking or anything house related.

    What have I become? A monster that's what


 

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