I feel scared too when we eventually have another one. But I feel that I know what it was that made me push her away and I will never allow those issues to rule my life ever again. As I said before, I draw my eldest one in closer to me if I ever feel that distance again.
Take it moment by moment
Last edited by MamaC; 15-04-2011 at 10:44. Reason: spelling
This the the worst thing I have ever done and I need to admit it to someone knowing I will not be judged.
I bit my 3 month old on the leg To this day I don't know if it was an accident or if I did it on purpose. It was 2am, I was at the end of my tether, I'd been trying to get her to sleep for hours, I wanted to scream and I grabbed something and just bit really hard, in my mind I thought it was the blanket, it was my baby girls leg in a cotton coverall. I have never been more ashamed of myself as a mother. She started screaming and she had a mouth shaped bruise for over a week. It snapped me right out of it and I just held her crying for the rest of the night. I couldn't believe I failed so much that I bit a baby.
Sometimes when I accidentally hurt DD, I wonder if we are subconsciously hurting them on purpose...Like I would NEVER ever want to hurt my baby or cause her harm EVER! But sometimes I do accidentally hurt her and often in times of frustration, I've wondered if, on a subconscious level, did I mean to do that?
Brood Mare, I cut the tips of all my three kids fingers off with baby nail clippers... not much of the finger, and not all the fingers, but enough to make a few of them bleed. I felt terrible and cried for ages... you would have thought I would learn after the first one... but noooo
Sent from my MB300 using Bubhub
Is it just me that noticed, that we've all admitted something that at one time or another another bubhub member has posted a topic about and the person got judged yet we're here pouring our hearts out and we've received nothing but sympathy, empathy and support?
I didn't want to be a 'viewer' and not post- so I wanted to say thank you to every one who was honest and posted here.
I'm not NOT posting because I am perfect, but because i cant relive my 'bad mummy moments' by writing them down.
I've had some shockers, and wanted to show you all support and solidarity lol
I hope by acknowledging the things I regret in the past I am being a 'better' mum now. Another thing that helps is I've made it out the other side if thee and a half years of fighting my DS1 with every aspect of sleep.
Thank you for this thread x
Thank you for this thread. Today my 3 month old has spent most of the day watching his mummy cry, and scream and shout at his daddy. It's been an awful day and he really doesn't deserve that. I was screaming at hubby to F off and bub was just sitting quietly in his swing with a confused scared look on his face. Later I was feeding him and bawling my eyes out and he smiled up at me - I just felt so guilty. My mum has always been horribly depressed and my parents always argued in front of me and I don't want my son to live in that sort of environment.
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