It has been a while since I posted so I thought I would update you on what has happened for me.
Firstly, so nice to hear of all the GC ladies going through IVF especially that most of us are going to Monash. I had a thought, maybe we should organise a support group? One where we all meet up maybe once a month for a coffee and a chat? just a thought....
So, I finally had my EPU, sadlt to report we only go one egg. Apparently there were 4 follicles in there but only one with an egg inside. I was so gutted when i say the number on my hand in recovery. I think it was at that moment that i knew this cycle was not going to work. Needless to say when I can out of recovery to find my gorgeous hubby sitting there waiting patiently for me he already knew. He also knew that the one egg they were able to retrieve was immature. He was so sweet in telling me, but he knew it was a devastating blow and was very supportive in his manner.
So after a bit of crying we went back to Monash and spoke with the scientist who gave me some renewed hope that this egg just might make it. But I knew in my heart that it wasnt going to be.
The following morning I had a call to say that the egg didnt survive. I was completely and utterly gutted!!
So today is 3 days on from receiving this news and i still feel very depressed and a bit raw about it. What has been difficult is seeing absolutley EVERYTHING to do with babies, pregnant woman etc. I have even had a girlfriend who just keeps telling me everyday about all these poeple she knows who have either just fallen pregnant or have had a baby. AND SHE KNOWS I HAVE JUST HAD A FAILED CYCLE!! GAH!!
So apart from that my DH has been amazing. He is so gutted like me, but has done well to hide it. He feels so helpless and is ****ed off that I had to go through all those injections for nothing. But he is being very sweet and supportive.
We too have been down the road of vasectomy and vasectomy reversal, and I too had the similar problem where having a baby was not as important to him as it was to me (he has an adult daughter from a previous marriage). One day I just put my foot down after i got sick of his pussy footing around. I just told him he either did this with me or if he didnt i would go through it myself, without him using someone else's sperm.
After a period of shock ( I think he knew deep down that I would do this without him) he jumped on board 100 percent. And has been very supportive and excited about our journey.
I have another appointment with Kee tommorrow to discuss what happened this cycle and to work out our next step.
Once I know what we are to do next I will be sure to check back in and let you know where I am at.
I have deceided to do some things for myself in the process and am in the process of starting on an endometriosis diet. At the very least I need to give myself the best chance possible in order to make IVF work for me, given that I am racing against the clock so to speak.
I hope all you other ladies are doing well. And let me know what you think about the support group idea!!
"when one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us"............