*Hi mods, I have also put this in the "discipline/behavior" section... for anyone in there that can help.
Does anyone know any books on dealing with traumatized adopted children, and/or books on disciplining them?
MIL has taken on caring for her half sisters daughter who is now 4 turning 5. Her parents have both died, and she was in foster care from about the age of 16months. She has been with us for 1 year now.
When she came to us she was very withdrawn, and had some strange behaviors... MIL gave her alot of room and is very lenient on her so she would feel comfortable in another country fitting in.... Now she is over powering, and has become very naughty.
MIL is at her wits end and is a mess. The girl knows the difference between right and wrong, but her latest episodes include bringing toads into the house when everyone was asleep, and this morning letting their indoor only cat, outside with the dogs.. The dogs attacked the cat and she was sitting there watching, not doing anything. When asked why she did these things, and what has she done, she simply starts crying and says i dont know. I think she figures when she crys MIL feels bad and hugs her and stuff and trys to comfort her.
MIL does not believe in smacking/hitting her, so if anyone knows any good books or where we can get information on how to deal with her that would be great.
MIL says she is still considered "traumatised" because of her parents death (even though she wouldnt remember them as they both died from seperate things when she was very young), and everything she went through while in foster care... She was basically ignored, and they had a very strict household... If that helps.
Would it be better dealing with her as a normal child, or as traumatized???