I want to stop, but feel so guilty.

**Lemonhead** · 08-12-2010 11:15

I've had it. I seriously cannot do it anymore and I am 99% sure I will be putting DS2 on formula in a couple of days.

I am sick of doing it all, DP wants to help with night feeds but how can he? I'm exhausted, sick, sore, leaky and over it. I've been crying for the last few days non stop because I feel like I am not enjoying my newborn. I feel like a failure but I just don't have that drive to keep going. Its not *that* important to me to continue BFing but I feel like I am letting DS down, like I am letting everyone who supported me down.

Having such a crap day

.

**Benji** · 08-12-2010 11:17

It's really not enjoyable being a sore milk-machine in the beginning.

IF this is something you want to continue for bub, I can promise you it does get better and much easier.

Please, don't base any decisions on outsiders. Nobody worth worrying about will be disappointed, you've got to do what you believe is best for you and Isaac

**Lemonhead** · 08-12-2010 11:20

I did a whole 3 weeks

wow go me.

I honestly don't know how some of you do it for YEARS its absolutely amazing, I have changed my entire viewpoint of BFing, kudo's to those who have the strength to persevere.

**danni3** · 08-12-2010 11:21

I remember feeling like that with both of my kids

**Tam-I-Am** · 08-12-2010 11:21

Bek, it's such early days. The early days ARE crap - and it DOES get better if you can stick them out.

Having said that, I agree with what Benji said - you can't base your life decisions on what other people think of you, and you know that

Are you co-sleeping with Isaac? Because that makes sleep so much easier to get in the early days. Even if it doesn't last forever, even if it only lasts a week or two so that you can get some better sleep, it may help. Do you know how to feed him lying down? Are you getting plenty of rest during the day? And have you had any time out for yourself? Even just a bath and a cup of tea can put things into perspective. Getting good help with all the unnecessary tasks, too. And maybe go see a lactation consultant so they can help you figure out why there's pain?

(gentle, for sore boobies).

**SuperGranny** · 08-12-2010 11:22

hi sausagefest, dont be down on yourself, everyone has bad days, and it is hard to get into the swing of things at first. If you feel you will be dissappointed if you stop bfeeding, then try to continue just one more day. If you feel you will be happy with your decision to stop, then stop. You could be just going through a bit of the baby blues, nothing major, but just every llittle thing is an upset. Im sure you do have the strength to carry on, but only if you want to. It is all hard work for the first little while, one personal cheer squad right here. Marie.

**Benji** · 08-12-2010 11:22

Originally Posted by SausageFest

I did a whole 3 weeks

wow go me.

I honestly don't know how some of you do it for YEARS its absolutely amazing, I have changed my entire viewpoint of BFing, kudo's to those who have the strength to persevere.

Three weeks is good - especially considering you had a caesarian!

No matter what you decide, I wanted to say well done

**Mrs Nietzsche** · 08-12-2010 11:23

Sausage, unfortunately breastfeeding is a bit back to front. The worst bit is at the start. Then it gets easier.

You know you don't need permission to stop or anything. However I will proceed on the basis of supporting you to continue just now.

Are you still giving him the ABs? Maybe if you could get rid of those then it will get a lot easier.

Is it the sleep that is bothering you most?

How can we help is what I'm trying to work out..

I've never formula fed so I don't understand why that would be easier. I *do* know that with every week breastfeeding will get easier, your boobs settle down, the baby gets stronger, it becomes like riding a bike.

**ComeBackKid** · 08-12-2010 11:24

You can always perserve and seek additional help from your MCHN, lactation consultants and the ABA if you want to continue.

But it is up to you - your mental health is just as important. If you feel you would cope better and enjoy your son more if you were FF - go for it.

Yes, we all know that breast is best - but it is not the be all and end all.

Do what is best for you.

**danni3** · 08-12-2010 11:26

Originally Posted by SausageFest

I did a whole 3 weeks

wow go me.

Thats fantastic though

With my DD I pushed through the crappy early weeks and kept it up for near 6 months. With my DS I couldn't (well didn't fel I could) push through it again and switched him over to formula at about 6 weeks. Both are happy healthy gorgeous kids