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  1. #471
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    hi gorgeous girls

    pls forgive me for sneaking in for a quick me post. am really struggling today. i'm sure it's partly the crinone doing its awful thing but i just feel hideous . hcg yesterday (12 day post-trigger, 5dpt) was 5.01. i am convinced it's the remainder of the trigger - i had a level of 3.2 hcg 12 days post-trigger with the iui and they give you a double ovidrel dose with an ivf cycle so i reckon it's the traces of that that are showing up. the only thing that will tell for sure is tomorrow's BT, which can't come quickly enough. at the stage of the cycle when i just want to know one way or the other and stop these #$%& drugs asap. sorry to be such a downer. i know i have so much to be thankful for with my two beautiful kids and in some ways feel very guilty for devoting so much emotional energy to the holy grail of a third. i'll be in a better space this time tomorrow when we know for sure whether it's worked or not - and, if not, can get stuck into a massive G&T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    trying, always, starf1sh - thank you beautifuls for your lovely words

    sorry again to vent. it will only get better from here

    slinky

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    Dear Slinky, I'm so sorry you are having such a tough, tough time of it. I don't know the ins and outs of HCG numbers but like you, I hope tomorrow comes soon and you can have your good old reliable blood test to end the uncertainty. I think its perfectly okay to rage and grieve an inability to easily conceive the family you want - whether its one, two or three children. To be able to make their own decisions about family size is something that should be every woman's birthright, and it comes too easily - far too easily - to some people, and is so, so unfair that it should come so hard to all of us. The willingness to face that, and to go through this arduous, traumatic and expensive journey, with all its frustrations, anger, fear and sadness, is what unites us all on this thread. So let it all hang out, and if you can, try to find some time to relax tonight and hopefully to have a good sleep. I know you'll have the strength to deal with whatever tomorrow brings, and I'm sending heaps of and hoping those numbers are all your lovely emby snuggling in and no Ovidrel.

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    slinkymalinki  (11-02-2011)

  4. #473
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    Slinky don't apologise for the vent,
    we all have those days and we completely understand.
    much love to you.

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    slinkymalinki  (11-02-2011)

  6. #474
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    tryingfortwo and fionaalice - big big thank you to both of you. You've both said just what I needed to hear And I appreciate it so much when I know that you are both having a pretty tough time of it yourselves.

    trying - it sounds like your week has been nothing short of hideous. How frustrating that your body seems to have a mind of its own at the moment. It is so NOT reassuring when medical professionals - in whom you're investing so much faith, not to mention big $$$ - can respond only with a 'huh, that's weird?'. Not impressive!!! Totally get what you were saying. Look forward to hearing what today's BTs revealed. And again, thank you so much for putting things in perspective. Your words were spot on and really helped

    fionaalice - just to say that I'm still crossing everything that this is the one for you You seem an incredibly calm and positive person. Here's to some of the good karma coming your way

    slinky

  7. #475
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    hello ladies

    It wasn't a surprise to find out this morning that this cycle is a BFN. I think I did my major yesterday although it's still . I have given my two real live babies an enormous squeeze and extra kisses. And will thoroughly enjoy a bit of this evening. Need to speak with FS to discuss what next. Think I have another cycle in me though apparently normal protocol at this clinic is waiting til AF #3 after a stim cycle which then becomes day 1, which means that everything would only start happening in May, which seems absolutely forever to wait. Will see what FS has to say.

    Very best of luck to our FET ladies fionaalice and spot and have everything crossed tryingfortwo for a successful stim cycle for you.

    For those of you waiting for various reasons - starf1sh, mum4nay, PinkButterfly, millie, MrsDaisyP, jfblady - hope time is passing as quickly as it can for you all and that things are moving - perceptibly or imperceptibly - closer to the Best Thing.

    To our UTD ladies - always, drmummy and melk - hope all cookin' along just fine.

    To anyone I've inadvertently missed -

    Thank you so much to each and every one of you for your support. It's been a lifesaver.

    slinky

  8. #476
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    HI lovely's,

    Sorry I've had a little BH holiday - but I do read most days with interest and so so wish that everyone gets their dream babies through all this headache!

    special hugs to Trying for 2 and Slinki - a sh1tty week it's been for you both and I hope you both find a way to move on ASAP to achieve your dreams...

  9. #477
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    SpotTheOcelot is offline 'Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.'
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    I am so very sorry to read this Slinky.... enjoy your drink tonight though and get back on the IVF bicycle when you are ready.


    Hello to everyone else.

    xxx

  10. #478
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    fionaalice - so great to hear your in the 2WW I am sending you some extra special

    spot - for FET this is the one for you

    slinkymalinki - i am so sorry to read this cycle wasn't to be

    daisy p - for your appointment on the 17th I hope this journey on this thread is a short one

    starf1sh - hope all is well with you


    a BIG hello to all mum4nay, tryfortwo, pinkbutterfly, pearlhobbes, millie, always, melk - sorry will take me a bit to catch up on all the news

    AFM - well back from our 5 weeks in Italy. Wow what a amazing place. So nice to have a break from thinking too much about IVF, although DH and I did have few teary chats together over a few .
    I will start a new full stim cycle in a few days time. FS is going all out this time, as each cycle we do is not improving. He has added viagra to improve lining and saizon injections to try to improve egg quality. Off and running again!

  11. #479
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    SpotTheOcelot is offline 'Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.'
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    Sabah what a wonderful break, of course I can imagine a few related chats, it is part of our funny little lives!!!!!

    Best of luck with oyur cycle, you are throwing a few new options in there! Good on you!

    x

  12. #480
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    Slinky so sorry.
    Thank you for your lovely words.

    Sabah - welcome back!! Thanks for your thoughts

    Spot - what's news with you?

    I am pretty resigned to this transfer being a negative, sadly. It's been a tough one knowing it's probably the last, and just trying to get my head around that. BT to confirm on Monday - I'll let you know. Felling pretty bummed out - which I know you will all understand, and generally just feeling pretty average ... will be glad to stop the drugs for a while, give my body a break.
    All that said though, I am not a complete mess, a few tears here and there, but I'll blame all the hormones for that

    Went to see "127 hours today" ... wow intense!

    Hope you are all having a relaxing or exciting weekend.


 

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