Insensitive people...

**CluckySC** · 11-10-2010 14:00

Have you had anyone be insensitive or thoughless about your loss? I've been lucky with such support generally but had a message from a friend today saying

"Hey, I've started this great new party plan selling candles and I was wondering if you could do a party for me at your house for it? I know you lost your baby last week but it would really help me out"

I haven't seen this girl for a year and a half but still know her on facebook so she knows everything that's happened and how shattered I was. I only had the d&c last Tuesday for Gods sakes... I'm still trying to find relevance in grocery shopping, clothes, cooking dinner, meeting friends, cleaning the house... party plan relevance - no way!

**JabberJaw** · 11-10-2010 14:03

Some people just don't it and unknowingly lack empathy.

**danni3** · 11-10-2010 14:03

huge hugs to you hunny

how very not on of your 'friend'. I know where she can stick her candles

I am sorry you have had someone be so insensitive but pleased you have other support around you

**NonnyMouse** · 11-10-2010 14:07

I would reply back with "Is this some sort of sick joke????"

Insenstive would be asking you do to a party plan at this point in time, but adding that last bit "I know you lost your baby last week but it would really help me out" goes into the realm of extremely insulting.

**~Candy~** · 11-10-2010 14:07

Heck yesss...I took super early unpaid maternity leave as soon as I could because I struggle with pregnancy sickness/fluid retention and severe carpel tunnel syndrome while trying to attend my family & home let alone trying to work (heavy lifting and very physical). My unpaid maternity leave has been accepted and just because I have had a M/C does NOT mean I am alright to go back to work and pretend all is fine

I keep getting messages..."when are you comming back to work?"
FFS Ping offffffffffff

I have an approved 12 months off and I will use it to TTC again.

**sunnyflower** · 11-10-2010 14:13

I am gobsmacked.

I would certainly be texting back and telling her where she can shove her stupid candles...

**BabelFish** · 11-10-2010 14:15

Oh my God. What a tool.

I wouldn't grace her with a response.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss

**faroutbrusselsprout** · 11-10-2010 14:24

Oh. My. God. Insensitive doesn't even cut it. Is she kidding??? I'm so sorry for your loss and having to deal with such a complete lack of.......brains! Hugs.

**River Song** · 11-10-2010 14:26

yup, sadly some people don't get it.

my 2nd ivf ended in miscarriage...when i told a friend she said "oh, sorry you got your period"

hug, i am so sorry for your loss

**Feebs04** · 11-10-2010 14:44

Originally Posted by sunnyflower

I would certainly be texting back and telling her where she can shove her stupid candles...

I split with my ex husband a few weeks after I had my 2nd miscarriage. On hearing this news, one of the girls at my work suggested I go out and get pregnant to some random guy "before it's too late"!!!!!!