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  1. #1
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    Angry Why do people criticize me for only wanting 1 child??

    I'm sure other women experience this, but everywhere i turn i seem to get the question 'so when will you have your next?'

    I just had my DS 6 months ago!

    When my husband and I talked kids, we never discussed a number.
    Now that I have had one I realise that I am totally content with just the one.
    People tell me all time time I will change my mind.
    Not to mention all the other crap they say!
    My own sister told me last night (she has 2 teenagers) that she has never known a nice only child and that they are normally less smart than children with siblings! I mean FFS, come on!!!

    Another one I have heard is that we don't have a real family until we have 2+ kids. This lovely one came from my DH!! So what have I got? A fake family? lol (he didn't have an answer for that).

    I really don't want anymore children. There is no desire in me for anymore. I love my little boy so much and financially one is more sensible for us.
    Not to mention I had a terrible pregnancy, and disasterous birth!
    Why can't everyone around me accept that?
    The only person I am willing to MAYBE compromise with, is my hubby.

    People can be so insensitive sometimes!

    Thanks for letting me vent!

  2. #2
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    Hooves is offline My children/my legacy, the best of me is inside them.
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    Some people should just Shut UP.

  3. #3
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    Ditto to what Hooves said - I get criticised because we're having our 5th. People will never be happy unless you do what they say - all the more reason to be happy with what you want and ignore them

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    Gawd I'm with you on this. I'm getting those comments too and dd is only 3 months old! Apart from the TTC for 2 years, IVF, painful pregnancy, GD, forceps delivery with episiotomy, I just love my dd so much I can't imagine ever putting myself and her through all that again!!! And then to have to share myself with ANOTHER person?! I think not! Haven't even brought it up with DH but as far as I'm concerned, one is just perfect for me personally.

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    Its annoying isn't it? I got it a lot for the first year. Not so much now that he is two.

    It bothered me because it took over a decade to have a child, I was 42 when he was born and I was single by the time people started to make the comments.

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    Some people need to mind their own bees wax

  7. #7
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    hug, it is so unfair but people will judge us no matter what we choose

    my sister has 1 and only wants one...she is an amazingly bright (bordering gifted), very well socialised, polite, happy and friendly child.

    I have 1 (i know i am having another but he has been alone for 6 years) and again he is thriving. Very well mannered, very social, very bright and happy child.

    People judge big families and small families and every single choice we make as parents.

    AS a family, you chose how you raise your kids ...you can make sure they are socialised and mannered etc etc

    Ignore the judgemental people...they don't live in your house and don't sleep in your bed...so they have no right to tell you what should do within it!

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    I hear ya.

    It's a bit like how no one will believe me that I intend to be single for the rest of my life and I am very happy with that. I always get "oh you never know what's around the corner..."

    Just because OTHER people aren't happy with a particular choice, doesn't mean EVERYONE is the same.


  9. #9
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    I'm glad I am not the only one to think this.
    If my sister had been infront of my face I would have probably slapped her! lol

    And as for hubby, it's easy for him to say. He's not at home with the screaming child and he's not up all night with him either.
    Whilst he certainly does his bit, he gets it far easier than I do. I cannot imagine splittling myself between two.
    I know people do it all the time, but I also know myself well enough to know that I possibly wouldn't cope.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hooves View Post
    Some people should just Shut UP.
    My son's family day carer asked me the other day (not for the first time) when I'm having a second, then went on to say that women that who only have 1 child or no children at all are selfish!! I really wish people would keep their crappy opinions to themselves. Don't worry, try to ignore such comments - I think a lot of people who have 1 child have to put up with insensitive comments and I too was asked from when DS was 6 months old after a horrible birth and pnd.


 

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