Partners of the PMS sufferer.. What is their role during this time?

**Pax** · 28-05-2010 21:05

PMS is a terrible experience for many of us women. It changes our reality, sometimes extremely.

During this time I am much more likely to ask for a divorce

I am much more likely to throw something

I am much more likely to do lots of bad stuff.

Now I know this about me, and I will tend to withdraw and state to those around me to leave me alone and not expect anything from me at this time.

I did notice in another thread people saying that it is the responsibility of the PMS sufferer to not take their moods out on others, that is fair enough but what is the responsibility of someone that is suppose to love you during this period.

I personally feel they should back down from possible arguments. Help more around the house, smile more and just give space.

that suits me

**Ana Gram** · 28-05-2010 22:10

I think people who don't suffer terribly are more likely to say that one shouldn't take their PMS out on other people.

I am often controlled by my hormones. I don't keep track of my menstrual cycle and only after a few days of me being emotional and cranky do I realise what is happening. The power of my mind is not powerful enough to override my hormones unfortunately.

I would like to think that partners should try and be supportive through it.

**headoverfeet** · 28-05-2010 22:17

I like to remind my partner during sane moments that I'm hormonal I get more hugs (even when I think I don't initially want them)

**Sheer Bliss** · 28-05-2010 22:21

I think that the sufferer should TRY and control their moments as much as they can. And the other person in the house should TRY HARDER to let things go, do more to help with everything until it has passed.

Same (I hope this isn't a bad comparison, as I don't smoke or suffer PMS badly) as when DH is having a craving for nicotine when quitting smoking, I expect him to control his moods as much as possible, but it is also my responsibility to back-down from arguments, be more agreeable and not bring up sensitive issues at those times.

**Leisa21** · 28-05-2010 22:23

I suffer really bad and it's uncontrollable some months. Two or three days before and I'm a monster. I'm irrational and I knowvit but I can't stop it.

DH can puck it up and just comforts me and doesn't do or say anything insensitive. If I'm being silly and over reacting he tells me he understands and throws chocolate

My Dr offered me a mild antidepressant but DH just told ne it's not worth it we'll deal. A couple of days every month or two is nothing. He always backs down and just accepts it. I apologise when the dust settles.

**Sheer Bliss** · 28-05-2010 22:29

Originally Posted by Leisa21

I suffer really bad and it's uncontrollable some months. Two or three days before and I'm a monster. I'm irrational and I knowvit but I can't stop it.

DH can puck it up and just comforts me and doesn't do or say anything insensitive. If I'm being silly and over reacting he tells me he understands and throws chocolate

My Dr offered me a mild antidepressant but DH just told ne it's not worth it we'll deal. A couple of days every month or two is nothing. He always backs down and just accepts it. I apologise when the dust settles.

I was like that with my last pregnancy. I KNEW I was being an unreasonable cow, but couldn't stop. It's not a nice feeling, but how awesome of your DH to be so understanding!

**Leisa21** · 28-05-2010 22:32

Originally Posted by charlis_mum

I was like that with my last pregnancy. I KNEW I was being an unreasonable cow, but couldn't stop. It's not a nice feeling, but how awesome of your DH to be so understanding!

Its tough. My DH is amazing, so calm and patient. I make up for it when I'm pregnant I'm so calm and happy. I don't stress at all so that's good lol.