When you go out in the evening...

[june05isttimer]

Hi there

Just wanting to know what you all do when you embark on going out of an evening when you have a little one and the biggest part of their routine is in the evening.....

I have a bub who is almost 11 weeks old and whilst we have been out for dinner a couple of times at a restaurant and also at peoples houses, Im in a dilemma as to what to do with her and her routine as she is now so settled in it.

By routine I mean that she generally has a bath, feed and then goes down for bed and sleeps through. She seems to be wanting to go to bed earlier than she used to and is now down most nights by 7.30pm.

I guess the issue with that is that when you are at someones house or out for dinner, this routine gets upset.
In general we have made early dinner dates so we are seated and eaten and finished by 8-9pm and this is mostly the same with our friends too when we go to their house.
I usually try and feed her around the 6-7pm mark when we are out and then give her a bath and top her up with a feed when we come home.

Is this what other people do ??? and do we all find it a bit yucky when you are out for dinner and the routine is upset?????

Are their any ideas or suggestions that I could do differently or does anyone else do the same thing when they go out????????

Its not like we are out all the time but it makes me feel funny when we actually do go out as Im on edge as I know bub is usually in bed when we are eating etc.....

[Renee Fleur]

I think the best thing about a having a routine is that it is flexible. Yes bub might be in a good sleeping pattern and nightly routine, but you have to make it fit in with your life too.

My question to you therefore is, do you want to spend the next 10 years being home by 7 as not to upset your children/s routine. Do you want them to control your social life?

My view is to go with the flow, let your kids adjust. Let them get used to being out and sleeping anywhere, in a noisy resteraunt or at another persons house. That way you can still enjoy your own life.

But to do this, you will have to let go of your own insecuirities and fears about 'routine'. You will have to allow yourself to do things differnetly, i.e., not bathe, not put on the bed time music. etc.

We have done this with both of our children and now at 8 & 5 we can go just about anywhere, stress free. If we are at friends places we put them down and they settle straight away - because that is the expectation and we are not stressed about it. If you think your child won't settle in an unfamiliar environment then they wont - because they sence your stress.

So relax and enjoy life.

Warmest regards,

Renee

[madvoice]

I first took my daughter out to dinner when she was 2 weeks old. She slept in the pram. Now she's almost 5 months and she sits in the pram playing or if she's a little grizzly either hubby and myself keep her entertained. She usually sleeps just as well and is a very flexible child with routines. A couple of weeks ago we went out for dinner and didn't get home until around 10.30pm. She was fine. We've also taken her to late sessions at the cinemas (thank god for crying rooms) and she's been very good. I feel that if you start them out young with variety they tend to take it in their stride a bit better. Raleigh's usual sleep time is around 7.30pm as well though it does vary from time to time. If bub is generally happy I wouldn't be too concerned.

[Briannabear]

Hi! We take our DD out and set up our porta-cot wherever we are. She always settles well in it.
However she wont sleep in her pram at any cost - its a pain in the butt, and we are still battling to know what to do about it!

[wattle]

Fortunately ds will sleep in his pram, but he needs to be pretty tired. I have a cosy sheepskin in there, and I wrap him up firmly and pop a dummy in. I also have a large piece of navy polar fleece material that blocks out light and quite a bit of sound that I put right over the pram. It seems to work ok and he is getting a bit more used to the idea now.

The only problem if we go out (which we really don't do often) is waking him up, unwrapping him, putting him in the car seat etc etc. By the time we get home he's wide awake! I might try the portacot thing soon perhaps.

[jamb]

We started early with taking bub out and he seems to just go with the flow. He sleeps in the pram- we usually hold him going to sleep even at home then pop in pram. Bub gets a dream feed when we get home and into his sleeping bag then off to sleep.

We travel ALOT- visiting friends and family and business commitments and again this started early and bub is flexible with this too.

Maybe we have a "good" (hate that word) bub but maybe its because this is all he has known.

Like Renee said, do you want to be trapped at home forever- I know kids who won't sleep at BBQ's and parents leave really early- and yet others who fall asleep with their pillow anywhere (I'm hoping for the second )

Good luck!

[jembelina]

our little man just does not want to miss a thing, so if we decide to go out for dinner or late night shopping or something it is unlikely he will sleep (sometimes i can get him to sleep after a feed, but only for half an hour or so). he is however, usually in an excellent mood, and will fall asleep in the car and transfer easily to bed. if we go visiting though he will go down in the porta cot. he is in a good nightime routine too, but i have never worried if he doesn't get to have a bath or whatever (usually i take him into a quite room and change into pj's and although i never used to worry, he is now easily distracted so i try to feed in a quiet room too) and it has never made a difference. all in all nit time outings aren't a problem, but i can completely understand your apprehension as we have had a few disasters where we have had to leave early... but this can happen ANYTIME!!! good luck