I think im losing it....

**NatLeah** · 15-07-2006 20:36

Well after searching the net for somewhere comfortable to chat I come across this site which is great as I really need some help... ( i think?)

I dont no where to start or what to start with so here goes...

I have a 9 month old little boy that I absolutely love to peices, my problem is I cant read a paper or watch the news without crying. It breaks my heart to hear stories of abuse on little babies and children. I serious cannot comprehend how people can be so cruel to children especially little defenceless babies. The last few days I have read in the paper about the little 3 year old boy who was raped and then died probably due to choking on his own vomit.
To think of the horror this little boy must have gone through keeps me awake at night just sitting here typing it I have tears streaming down my face.

Im also a service manager in a large retail outlet, the area in which I work has alot of comission housing and some very uneducated people (i dont wish to offend anyone) but whenever I see a child being mistreated I cannot keep my mouth shut. The other day I watched a feral mother pick her 18month (?) old up by the arm and pretty much throw her in the trolley I couldnt help myself... I had to have a crack at her. Surely its just a matter of time before a get a compaint made about me.

I suppose Im wondering am I just feeling like this cos Im a mum now or am I falling into some sort of delayed post natal depression?

ANY advice wouldreally be appreciated...

**rynosmum** · 15-07-2006 20:43

Hi There,

I know exactly how you feel. Things challenge me emotionally so much more than they used to pre-bub.

Our babies are so very precious and when we see or hear of one being mistreated, I think we imagine how our child would react in that situation (or at least I do).

You're not losing it - just a Mum who cares for the welfare of others.

**cmd'smum** · 15-07-2006 20:49

Natleah, sorry hun

can't help you much as although I feel sick to the stomach of ppl hurting babies, not the same reaction as you are having.

I guess part of it would be because you're a mum now, because I know I get more upset when I hear about child abuse now that I'm a mum, but maybe you should also see your gp or health nurse and discuss the way you are feeling just to rule out PND.

Good luck

**talon** · 15-07-2006 20:59

For me it was sort of an emotional realisation. Before I had a child I obviously knew that sort of thing happened but I had some emotional distance from it because I had never had that sort of attachment to another person before.

Now that I have a son (who I would die for in a second and throttle someone who dared to hurt him in anyway) I get really upset when I see the forms of abuse that go on in the world. I get quite emotional and stressed about it all and often (if it is on tv) I just cannot watch it.

I think the way you feel is natural and normal - it is a primal urge that parents have. You are one of the ones who are very good at expressing it and I actually applaud you for having the balls to take a stand and speak up when it does impact you in that way. You are a strong person, and the way you react is quite natural.

But of course, my opinion is based on what you have written. If you are really worried definitely go and see someone to check.

**ziggie** · 15-07-2006 21:11

Natleah,

I'm hubby of wife who found this site recently and i can't believe how many normal people there are out there. i'm 29 and won't go into detail, but i've seen some nasty things. myself, watching the news the last few weeks has made me (unemotive tough guy!) want to cry. i'm just glad about the public outcry to these incidents - that the majority of people out there think and feel the same way we do. most people are descent, and although you're probably very emotional as a new mum, i believe there would be something wrong with anyone who didn't really feel for the young victims of these tragic events, and their families.

Love your little one, protect them, and good on you for speaking up in public!

Damo

**Mother Duck** · 15-07-2006 21:13

I so understand!

Welcome to bub hub by the way - I think you will fit right in by the sound of it!

I feel exactly the same way although I do tend to bite my lip wrt commenting on other people's parenting - its not that I don't see it, I won't go into it too much here but where I work there is alot of parenting 'issues' - its just that I try to be practical about what the end result of my expressing myself is - ie will it make a difference?

I have never been worried by things to do with children before like I am now - not to say it didn't bother me - but I was able to remain disjointed from it - since having a baby I can't stand it

Like you have said it makes me feel sick to the gut, just breaks my heart - I'm afraid my defence to it is not so good, I just avoid it - I don't 'over-read' articles on child abuse, I turn off movies with pain to children etc - and I don't let myself think about it - otherwise I would go nuts, its just too painfull

BUT - where and when I think I can make a difference I WILL go out of my way to do so, sometimes in small steps just by encouraging a parent who is having trouble knowing 'how' to parent - and sometimes by donating to appropriate causes

Anyway

- lovely to meet you and I'll see you around

PS - Ryno's mum - why am I not surprised to find you here!

**Natsmummy** · 15-07-2006 21:19

I feel the same way. I also cry every time I see anything about sick kids - ads for Ronald McDonald House and other such charities seem to set me off every time these days.

**natasha** · 16-07-2006 09:59

I feel exactly the same! Before I had Anna, i knew that child abuse went on but it never upset me to the extent it does now. When i hear about things like that going on it makes me so anxious and just sad. I don't know how im ever going to cope when Anna is old enough to go out on her own.

It makes me not want to bring another child into this world! Thats how much i think about it. I sometimes wish I'd never had DD because of all the things that could happen to her, breaks my heart.

**Hokey Pokey** · 16-07-2006 11:55

I am like that too, cry at the drop of a hat, even drama tv shows upset me.

**Harmony83** · 16-07-2006 12:48

I completely understand how you feel! Sometimes I feel like a nervous wreck and just can't handle it anymore... Its a motherly instinct thing, whenever I hear of a child being harmed I fall apart, its not fair, no child should ever have to feel pain, and it breaks my heart when they do! My partner is the same, it gets very worked up if he hears of children being hurt...