Feeling depressed, need some advice..

**peaches** · 02-07-2006 23:52

Hi guys,
I found this site searching the web on pregnancy/birth info. I havent got any children or am pregnant yet but i am hoping to be soon. I arrived in australia 1 year ago from the UK. I met my partner in london, he is aussie, i am english. We had been together for 3 yrs before deciding to make the move to australia. I had had enough of the uk weather and he had been there for 3 years and had done all his travelling. I was excited to come and live in australia, which is portrayed as the epitomy of the ideal lifestyle, here in the uk. Australia is seen as a world away from the misery of england...
I have been here a year now, living on the gold coast, have a job that pays a decent salary, but im not as happy as i thought i would be. Sure, its a world away from the rat race of london, your winters sh**t all over our summers, the cost of living is a lot cheaper, and there are beaches on my door step. Its the stuff of dreams really...
But... I am feeling miserable, i dont know anyone here. Even though i have been working in my job for a year now, i feel like i still cant connect with them, they are not the type of people that i would normally associate with. In london i had a very active social life, we always went out for drinks on the weekend, but with my job here, they are more concerned with getting a few more work hours in than enjoying life, instead of enjoying having the weekend off, they are all lookin to take on extra hours and work the weekend! Im not used to this, there seems to be a big, 'Work as much as you can, forget about your social life, or forget about your life and pay the morgage off quick" mentality in my work, i have never experienced this before...
I am going slightly off what i want to say which is this, when friday night comes i really get on the wine, i drink nearly 2 bottles on fri and the same on sat night. This makes me feel happy, albiet for a short time... But this is what my weekends now consist of, drinking myself into oblivion, or drinking so much that i need to listen to all the cheesy music on my computer, which sounds really good by the way...
Also, i have been put on anti depressants which i never in my life thought i would ever need. I am not happy with my life at all. Its nothing to do with my DP, he is amazing, hardly ever drinks. I just miss my family and feel so far away from home... Sorry for blabbing on for so long and thanks for listening.

**Tisme** · 03-07-2006 06:17

Welcome to the hub Peaches. WE are a fairly looney bunch but most people find us addictive!!!

I personally have lived in Syd all my life and have never considered living anywhere else so on that level I have no idea what it would be like to up and move across to the other side of the world.

But ..... my parents came out here from Ireland with my eldest brothr only 18mths old and I have always heard how it was the hardest decision of my mothers life to come to a strange country. My parents used to have a VERY active social life with dances and the pub all the time, then they came here to a hostel with the "10 pound" immigrants and worked their way through people they connected with. They went "home" for a while when I was 2 but Mum says now it really didn't feel like home.

Anyways enough about me ...... I have a friend who has moved back to London a couple of times and ended up coming home for one reason or another and she lives on the Gold Coast .... can I pass your email on for you?? PM me anytime

**Roopee** · 03-07-2006 07:27

Oh big

for you.
I know its not the same but a few years ago we moved from Newcastle to Wollongong and i hated it instantly. All our family and friends were in Newcastle and i was so so lonely. The girls i worked with were *****y, negative and VERY clicky. I was depressed UNTIL i had my first baby, when i met so may wonderful people, my best friend in fact.
BUT i still hated the area and couldnt wait to move back to Newcastle which we did 3 years later.
If i lived closer to you i would be around to your place like a shot to make a new friend but im about 10 hrs away.
So hopefully this place bubhub, will help you in your search for happiness

**Crissie** · 03-07-2006 08:26

trust me peaches- and a big hello by the way!!

- you'll find atleast 1 good mate here on bub hub... all the chicks r great and you'll can even meet ppl in your area... this is the 1 place on the net i feel safe... that the ppl im talkin to arnt crazy wierdos!!- jst a little crazy sometimes!! lol.

i hope u find some good mates soon.. and u can pm (private message!) me if ud like a chat!

**LA62** · 03-07-2006 09:47

Hi Peeches and welcome

Im also from the uk, been in oz 2 years just, i find it hard, but you will get there, and also if your planning kids the i think oz is a better place to raise you kids with the beaches, weather and just general outdoor life style.

If you ever need to chat im here, chin up honey it does get easier with time

PS there is and section for xpats from the uk if you scroll down the main bit, have a look and you'll see lots of us brits on there

**Jenko** · 03-07-2006 10:10

Hi Peaches. Welcome to bubhub! I moved to the gold coast from sydney about 8 months ago and haven't met many new people. I do have my best friend here so that makes it much easier and i've met a few of the lovely gold coast bub hubbers too. I had lived in sydney my whole life and had family and friends there (my family have left sydney too now) I miss my family and friends too. Especially when your a bit down, it just seems to emphasise it, doesn't it?

I also used to enjoy an active social life and wouldn't miss a friday night drink. Not so much these days, since having DD though. Although before i fell pregnant with no.2 i would enjoy a nice bottle of wine on a friday night! Would love to go for a few wines with you but unfortunately it will have to wait till next year!!

It is hard meeting new people, and it doesn't sound like your workmates are much fun!

You will meet some lovely people here on bubhub. Everyone is very friendly and there is always someone on here to chat to. There is always gold coast bubhub meets and even girls nights out (i'm yet to make it to one of those yet) So keep your eyes open on and come along and meet some of us. (By the time you fall pregnant and have a baby you may already have a network of mummy friends!)

Chin up peaches and sending big

your way! I hope things start to look up for you soon

**leenaomi** · 03-07-2006 10:44

Hi Peaches,

I'm also on the Gold Coast and am always looking for new friends so I would be more than happy to join you on your Friday night wine times!!! I'm a very social person as well so I know how depressing it can be to be stuck on your own.

As all the other girls have said, Bubhub is a great place to meet people and there are quite a few of us on the Gold Coast. I haven't been to a get-together yet but there are regular ones both with and without the kids.

Feel free to PM (private message) me if you'd like to meet in person. Look forward to hearing from you!

**Elijahsmama** · 03-07-2006 15:23

I know how you must feel - in a way. I moved to Perth from NZ 2&1/2 yrs ago and because im so shy i have found it really difficult. All my friends and family are in NZ and it was just me & DH who took off. Although i love Australia; better money, jobs and weather; it still dosent feel like home but neither does NZ now. Im sort of in a cross between worlds

But it is getting easier. I hope things become better for you soon. Why dont you go to one of the Brisbane meets? Even though you dont have a child yet, im sure they would'nt mind. I know the Perthonians wouldnt.