THE TRUTH and LIES... SORRY FOR ALL im about to say

**teen17** · 23-07-2009 08:12

here it is... THE TRUTH that is.

im 18 turning 19, only hav 1 lil boy. born in april. my partner is 42. i dont hav fertility issues and never took clomid. all a lie. i only seen Dr Bates once. hes a good Dr but yes pushy n can be a lil snip-happy IYKWIM. my life is pretty normal. altho some would debate why someone my age wants kids (answer? cos i do hav early onset menopause threatening me). until i met my DP i thought id need to use IVF to hav babies when i was older! but now im happily engaged with ONE lil boy and a loving fiance. i kno iv hurt alot of ppl on this forum and that is why i apologise for my actions. IM SORRY. n i will take no further part in forum discussions and will leave u all in peace. i am a compulsive liar alot of the time i dont even realise im lying sometimes. i even hav a counselllor ( all my yimg started when i was ashamed of my father).
everything i said about Dr Bates is true. he is good dr, tho if u ladies want drug free birth do not let him talk u into anything!! he does do alot of Csections, why i chose him.
i dono wat else to say i cant even remember most of wat iv claimed but i kno wat is true. prob is as a compulsive liar i just do it n then i trap myself own with more lies and it gets out of control. i almost lost my partner over this. but with help im getting better n when it gets hard i kno coming clean n apologising is best n then i walk away to save ppl more pain.
so let me say this again...
I DID NOT TAKE CLOMID N DONT HAV PROBS FERTILITY WISE, but I DO hav family his of early menopause.
I have ONE son. he was born on 30/4/09. i hav had a m/c in August 07 n July08.
it was my own choice to hav another baby now. even after my C/S. i kno its a risk but im ashamed to say im willing to take it. but unless u face only a few yrs left to complete a family u hav no idea wat it feels like. my mum wanted 6kids n only got 3! she had menopause at 26 n her mother at 23.
i suffer from depression sometimes.
i cant think of anythin else but anythin else u can take as a lie too.... cos if it was true i shouldv already mentioned it. IM SORRY. there would b too many to count.... easiest way is for me to sayto u wat i say to my friends... dont take wat i say too seriously. they see me reularly n kno how compulsive my lying is. it hurts ppl too.
thats why all i will say now is SORRY.
n i will leave these forums n ask for my account to be close so i cant hurt any others...iv done enough damage when all u ladies wanted to do was give support :'( IM SORRY. please dont take this as a reason not too trust each other. im just one compulsiv liar... that shouldnt affect ur judgement of others.

*SIGNING OFF*

nothing i will say makes it right n i kno this but all i hav on ere is words.... IM SORRY!

**Mathermy** · 23-07-2009 08:16

Just wanted to give you a big hug, it takes a very strong person to come out and be vulnerable and face reality

Take good care of you ok, things will get better from here

**teen17** · 23-07-2009 08:23

thanks... dont really deserve nice ppl like u. iv done so much to hurt ppl.
im hoping my counsellor can oneday put an end to my compulsive lies....

before i ruin ppls trust n hurt more ppl...

**Mathermy** · 23-07-2009 08:28

Originally Posted by teen17

thanks... dont really deserve nice ppl like u. iv done so much to hurt ppl.
im hoping my counsellor can oneday put an end to my compulsive lies....

before i ruin ppls trust n hurt more ppl...

If you go to your GP, you can get a referral to a psychologist and get a number of subsidised sessions, I would really advise you do this. Imagine how wonderful your life will be when you can feel the freedom to just be you, no lies...because in reality you are enough just as you are

Lifeline is free as I believe are a lot of other counselling services available to the public, though personally i would see a psychologist.

**MissMetal** · 23-07-2009 08:32

wow... ummmm at least you are realising i guess... thats a very important step to recovery.. hope your bub has a good stable upbringing. good luck.

**gazelle** · 23-07-2009 08:51

I just PMed you as the other threads got deleted!

Anyway, I know I can't speak on behalf of all the May mummies, but as for me - I think you're brave to confront this and I am in no way angry or upset with you. It must have been a difficult decision to make this post

.

I agree with Malol, maybe check whether you can get a mental health plan where psychologist's sessions are subsidised by Medicare. I think they could really help you

.
I also think Malol made an excellent point about just being 'you'

**jag5000** · 23-07-2009 09:03

Originally Posted by Malol

Imagine how wonderful your life will be when you can feel the freedom to just be you, no lies...because in reality you are enough just as you are

very brave to admit this! kudos for that..

maybe not online, but I do think people know when someone else is lying most of the time irl. Just think how bad you probably feel when you are 'caught out'

**Rebdot** · 23-07-2009 09:30

Im in my 3rd year (currently deferred, because im pg) at uni studying social science (psychology).

Compulsive liars never come clean unless its another compulsive lie.

In work placement i sat in on a class with a compulsive liar and he lied about small silly things that were not worth lying over and even when the truth was clearly apparent and shown to him, he would still not admit he was being untruthfull.

They have a deep fear of being caught out and go to any lengths to cover their lies, they lie to the absolute end and never admit it.

I would be carefull not to get sucked into this.

Im not actually allowed to comment outside uni on these issues as when your study it becomes unethical to comment on such, but as a person on here who read your lies, You clearly need more help than what your getting and it would be mature and smart of you to get it before you have your second child.

Goodluck and all the best.

**Mrs Nietzsche** · 23-07-2009 09:34

Originally Posted by Rebdot

Im not actually allowed to comment outside uni on these issues
Goodluck and all the best.

What?

I think you may have misunderstood.

It is unethical to diagnose people based on very little information when you aren't a professional.

Commenting on issues is perfectly fine.