How will we cope? :(

[katiek]

Hi Girls

I am 36wks but am expecting m first bubba any day as I had a show last week and was found to already be 1-2cm dilated. Naturally my anticipation is very high at this time and I have been running around trying to do as much as I can

Today I was sorting out the baby's room and moved a whole lot of stuff we had been given and had bought ourselves over the last few months and all of a sudden it "hit" me that we had no room to store this stuff. We were not able to afford a wardrobe for the baby's room so bought a 4 draw tall boy but clearly it is not going to do the job. I had tried to explain this to my husband months ago but he has no idea what is actually involved with a new baby! We have nappies everywhere at the moment and I am a crying mess as we still have lots to buy and no money to buy it with. One of my other concerns is that we dont have adequate heating in our house as our gas heater is no longer working and we just can not afford a new one at this stage. Last night it was -1 degrees and I dont want to bring my baby into a home that isnt warm enough. I dont know how we are going to cope. I have given up work but only plan to stay away for 6 months as this is all we can financially afford to do. It breaks my heart that I cant stay at home with my baby for longer than this

My parents have been good so far in their support both emotionally and financially during my pregnancy but there is only so much help you can ask for. I dont want to ask them again to help us out as I feel so guilty.

Is it normal to feel this apprehensive just before your baby comes? I am a slobbering mess at the moment! I just can't stop myself from crying and feel very alone. I know things are probably not as bad as I am making them seem in this post. It is just so overwhelming with everything that needs to be bought and done. I have been in great spirits thru out my pregnancy until now.

Thanks for reading and sorry for this huge post!

Kate
36wks 4 d

[JenNT]

You will cope, you will be amazed at how you adjust to make it work. Don't forget you will get $4000 within a couple of weeks of baby being born( as long as you submit form asap) so buy a heater then.Also you will get payments from centrelink which helps a bit too.
In regards to space, i only had a tallboy too and managed just fine.Put your nappies in a nappy stacker and the rest in your linen cupboard.I also bought a cloth divider thingy from woolies that you hang on the curtain rod and has about 6 slots for clothes, nappies etc and cost $10.

Hope this helps but yes it is usual to stress this close and you will look back and wonder why you wasted your energy

Chin up cheers Jen

[Tea Lady]

Pregnant woman a blubbering mess? Overwhelmed by everything? Sounds pretty normal to me!

Here's some suggestions:

* Make a list of things that have to be done and things that you'd like to be done - this will make it all seem more manageable. Then your DH can see what he needs to do too.

*Only buy things now that you'll need for the next month or two and use the maternity payment for anything that you can live without for a few weeks.

* you don't need heaps of clothes and things for babies - and you can store everything except for what you need at the time (so your 4 drawer tall boy should be adequate) - by store I mean in boxes under the cot or in the garage or something, nothing fancy.

* Big plastic bags or boxes are great for shoving things in to make them look slightly more tidy.

* Cloth nappies would save you a fortune (maybe you already have some?). You can get terry towelling ones on ebay for hardly anything.

*You can keep bubs pretty warm by layering their clothes - they can wear a few singlets and a few suits at the same time and then be wrapped in a warm wrap and they stay pretty warm. It's actually alot more dangerous for babies to get too hot than to get a bit chilly.

* You could also buy a cheap fan heater to use for nappy changes and things (but not to leave on while bub is asleep). That's what we do anyway.

* Buy whatever you can 2nd hand - from the paper or ebay. Babies can't tell the difference.

* If you're really stuck, now or later, a local church would probably help you out. You can ring or write a letter and explain your situation and they would probably have people with baby things they don't need anymore that could give / lend them to you. They certainly wouldn't mind you asking.



I hope you feel better soon. Even the best husbands never really understand what it's like to be a hormonal pregnant woman!

[katiek]

Thanks

Deep down I think I know we will manage somehow but sometimes I think I just need to be reminded of it.

Its also great to know that I can blame my hormones on this as it is quite out of character for me to be so emotional and teary

[cjb/jbvd]

awwww kate

you're going to be ok!!! someone very wise once said that a baby needs just a very few basics: being clean, well fed and warm. all the rest is just trimming. so don't stress if you don't have absolutely all the stuff you can imagine for your baby all at once......

first of all, do you have a laundry/linen cupboard or space in your wardrobe for any baby stuff???
if you don't, then have you considered getting some clear plastic storage boxes for under bub's bed?? they are usually pretty cheap.......
if that is not an alternative either, then just stack baby's stuff neatly in his/her room. no-one but mum and dad usually go in there anyway........

as for heating, well if you keep bub wrapped up/dressed all toasty (beanie, gloves, warm socks, singlet under clothes etc), then you shouldn't have too many problems. alternatively, check with your gas company as to whether you can get a heater on installment plan.......

if all that fails, lodge your maternity payment form as soon as humanely possible. payment takes hardly any time to clear (max of two weeks)and that's an extra $3000.00 tax free money so you can get what you need.

it's totally normal to freak out about even the tiniest thing before bub arrives, let alone financial worries. you and DH are going to be great parents, rich or poor, better or worse. as long as you love bub as much as you obviously do, then everything else is a cinch.......

[bellagirl]

hi katie,

i sent you a pm.

[Tisme]

My Mum always told me that the baby brings it's own ... between the gifts you recieve and the things that "fall" into your lap somehow it all works out. But the tears are quite NORMAL.

Take care of you and your bundle of joy.

[p4purple]

Ohh sweet heart. You want to be the best mum for your bub that you can be! That can be seen as plain as day. What great practical advice and support you can get here on bub hub.....Tea Lady has got you sorted.... thatwas awesome advice! and you gotta love the baby bonus! .....and if bub can wait til july it will be $4000 not $3000!

[Megansmum]

Just wanted to let you know that I found a room heater for my DD at Big W for $40.00. It gets very cold here as well so I too was faced with the dilema of heating her room, without spending $300 on an oil heater. Hope this helps a little.

Sarah-Jane