Too young for my second!!????

[bubbabelly]

Im 18 and i have just found out im about 6 weeks pregnant with number 2!
I think i am too young to have a second child as my first isnt even a year old yet. This pregnancy was totally unplanned.
I am a single mother and this will be the last opertunity to give my son a full blooded sibling.
I worry if i have this baby i will never find a boyfriend because it is alot to ask someone to take on 2 kids that arnt his?
I dont want to have an abortion But i dont want to have another baby. I think its unfair to my son cos he is still a baby!
Has anyone been in this situation or have any advice?

Myself: Hollie
D.S. Hunter 18/06/2005
Bub Due: 3rd of Feb

[Niki]

i have a friend with 2kids and she is 19 and neva has trouble finding guys, it all depends on the guy i think there are alot of decent guys out there that wouldnt mind!

[Grizabella]

Don't stress about finding a bloke honey! Your babies will only be a problem to guys who aren't interested in being a proper part of your life. They will probably do you a favour by weeding out *********. Just be proud of being yourself and a good mummy. Don't make a decision that isn't right for you. Take your time and follow your heart.

[sugar n spice]

I fell pregnant at 17, 20 and 22 so i was 18, 21 and i will still be 23 when my third is born. Sorry i cant be much help but go with whats in your heart but also consider how you may feel later on. It took love to make a child.

[Odessa]

Im 18 and i have just found out im about 6 weeks pregnant with number 2!
I think i am too young to have a second child as my first isnt even a year old yet. This pregnancy was totally unplanned.
I am a single mother and this will be the last opertunity to give my son a full blooded sibling.
I worry if i have this baby i will never find a boyfriend because it is alot to ask someone to take on 2 kids that arnt his?
I dont want to have an abortion But i dont want to have another baby. I think its unfair to my son cos he is still a baby!
Has anyone been in this situation or have any advice?

Myself: Hollie
D.S. Hunter 18/06/2005
Bub Due: 3rd of Feb

Hi Hollie,

It sounds like you are unprepared for this second baby. You really need to think seriously about this decision, because you are the only one in the position to make a decision. Things to consider:

Can you support another baby?
Do you have any support yourself? (Emotional support, family, friends, etc)
Can you afford another baby? I know Centrelink benefits are available, but they're still modest.

I don't think that "the opportunity to give your son a full-blooded sibling" is a very important factor, but that's just my opinion. You are still young, you have plenty of time to expand your family when the time is right.

No matter what decision you make, you're sure to find support on Bubhub

Cheers,

Odessa

[Femme-Fetale]

Hiya hun
Firstly your not to young unless you think your too young. and if u think you are too young, then arent you too young to have the 1st child too. Do u get what i mean. Your not to young. I bet ur more mature and set up then most others your age, so really a number refering to your age is simply just that, a number!!
I think the fact that this pregnancy will provide your son with a full blooded bro/sis is great!! Not that it really matters much these days but it is nice to know isnt it. Also i think your son would benifit from having a sibling, and would also give u some hands free time becoz the kids would play together while u got to do what ever needs doing. im a solo mother as well to a 1 yr old and althou there is no way in hell i would have another kid, i think it would be nice for him to have a sibling to share life with and grow and learn together. He wont be hanging off you for your attention all the time thats for sure. And the babies being close in age is a big bonus, they will get on better (just my opinion) then kids with a way larger age gap.
Futur boyfriends would be the last thing on my mind if i were you too. Just focus on you and your life for now. its clear u have alot of thinking and planning to do, regardless of what u choose to do. If ur not for abortions then it seems your going to have this child. It wont be that hard hunny, i know a girl who is 19 and is preg with her 3rd, shes 4 weeks along! Of course there will be changes and it will mean going throu those 1st yukky mths again but you will love your child and look back at this time thinking "what were u on about" lol
And also just think, for every single mother out there, there is also a single father some where too. Those single parents didnt just come out of thin air and not every mother/father split is for bad reasons and if they are, not always cos the man was bad. I dated a single father of 3 recently, but had to end it coz im leaving the state. he was a champion and his kids were great. Dont worry about men, when the time comes for you to start looking, u will meet plenty men who are willing and able to be with u and love your kids just the same.
I hope ive helped u put things into perspective some wat, i hope i dont sound like i preacher, i just want to help u through this, u sounded a bit lost, confused, or maybe thats just how i read it.
Anyhow if u EVER want to talk this out with me then pls feel free to add me to your MSN list, im usually on and will help u with any thing u need, or just let u vent away if thats what u need to do in order to clear your mind and make the right choices for YOU. Coz at the end of all this, all that matters is you and your kids, not me, not your family, friends and deff not a man that isnt even on the scene yet and may not even be for some time to come.
Chin up babe, and keep us updated wont you, u know we all care for you.

ROZA

[dannii]

Hi Hollie!
i just wanted to tell you to not stress about this. I was also 18 with 2 children and turned out to be a single mum to! (while kids were young)
I then went on to meet a guy and i worried about the same thing.. i more worried he would resent me later on for burdening him with a pre made family. But it turned out wonderful and he is fantastic to my kids!!

i couldnt be more happy ever!
Things can and will turn out alright for you!!
Please feel free to pm me if you need to talk or need some more support, im here

[brooke]

hollie...
I have no advice but I am sure you will make the right decision no matter what you choose....
Just because you have 2 kids doesnt mean you wont find a man! seriously it doesnt seem to matter to men these days!

[OM]

Do what you think is best! No one can make the decision for you and no one should judge you for the decision you choose either regardless of what you pick.

Keep us posted on what you do though.

Good luck and follow your heart!

[bubbabelly]

Thank you all for your support!!!

The reason i want Hunter to have a sibling is because i am an only child. I would have loved a brother or sister because i was always so bored and lonely.

Odessa: I have no support at all! My mum is the only person who lives in queensland (family wise) that could help me out and she is not a very nice person.
As for supporting another baby financially i think i could cope. Its just the whole thing of having to re-buy everything because i gave away all the things like the change table, bouncers ect....everything i thought i wouldnt be needing for YEARS!!!

Hunters dad and i were together until i was 14 weeks pregnant with hunter, then he hit me so i left him. He told me he was sorry and he would never do it again. Never the less it took me over a year to forgive him and i went back to him when hunter was 9 months old. A week ago he hit me again so i left him again. 2 days later i find out im pregnant!

I agree, Finding a guy should be one of the last thoughts on my mind and as of now it is.
I think i will keep this baby because my gut is telling me i cant get rid of it.

I think you can be a good mum at 18 and a bad mum at 35!!!