DD will never go to school with siblings :(

**Jamaica** · 06-06-2008 19:52

Today while walking to get DD from school I did the math and realised that DD will never go to school with any siblings

I was shattered, I mean I now she's 5 but I never looked at this aspect of the age gap before, its heartbreaking. Even if we get pregnant in the next couple of cycles DD will be starting high school the yr the baby would start primary school.
TO anyone with a big age gap, does it mean my future kids wont be close to DD? Will it be hard for them to bond being there will be an age gap of atleast 6yrs?

**biscotti** · 06-06-2008 19:59

I have a similiar age gap between my no 2 and no 3 babies, an 8.5 yr old and a 21 mth old and they have a fabulous, loving, adoring relationship

**JJJ&D'sMum** · 06-06-2008 21:21

There are 5yrs between DS1 and DS2 and 10 yrs between DS2 and DD. There was never a problem with the boys being close...they just did the usual and fought like boys LOL DS2 totally dotes on DD and I don't see that changing at all. He loves her way too much.

You shouldn't have any problem at all with any age gap. Good luck TTC.

Lots of

for you,
CC

**canberramomma** · 06-06-2008 21:36

I wouldn't sweat it. I was in year 5 when my next sibling started school and was never at school with my youngest sibling. Our oldest has often never been in the same state with her siblings when they are at school and she's much older than them and my next oldest will be in high school when my current youngest starts school. I really think it's the closeness at home that counts.

**mmm7** · 07-06-2008 00:45

Don't worry too much about it. My oldest sister was in year 7 when I started primary school and we were very close.
Kids make friends at school, they are never really alone

**StrawberryTheMilkshake** · 07-06-2008 05:20

My DD will be the same too Jaimaca, she is already 4 and we arent even close to having another baby yet.

I figure that the older age gap will result in a helpful relationship and one which they can help each other with school work, etc!!! I would have loved to have an older brother or sister to take care of me!!!

Dont beat yourself up about it, many of us are having the same thing happen.... sometimes it just doesnt happen the way we want it to....

Are you feeling any better about your ordeal?

STM

**Areca** · 07-06-2008 06:44

There's only two years between me and my sister but I hated having to go to school with her! We weren't friends and she just annoyed me cause no matter what I did she found out about it and dobbed me in to our p's. I hated her (in the way you hate but still love your siblings) and I think we would've gotten along much better at home if she wasn't such a miss goody two shoes who loved watching me get in trouble. I never did anything really bad either. If I'd dare go and talk to her at school she'd be rude and mean to me. The only time she was nice was when I started year 7 and would get lost looking for my next class. But that was the only time she was ever useful and my friends had siblings at the school so I could've got around that really easy. She has since apologised for being such a PITA!

I wouldn't worry about it...going to school together does not determine the closeness of a family.

**Susan Mac** · 07-06-2008 15:30

I was literally never at school the same time as three of my siblings - in fact my youngest brother never played 'school' he pretended to go to 'the universe' and do his assignments. I was at uni when he was born, and two other siblings started school before after I'd graduated.

I don't think it should matter too much. I think you are going through a tough time and anything like this will affect you more than it would otherwise, IykWIM.

(btw:- hope you get a baby soon!!!)

**lunawolfspirit** · 08-06-2008 04:29

my sister is 7 years older then me, we are not very close but are getting closer. my hubby's brother is 7 years older then him and they are getting closer.

there was lots of love between me and my sister and my hubby and his brother when we were kids but as the older ones grew up they grew apart, it happened with me and my hubby. i can honestly say i was raised like an only child. and so can my hubby

when my sister was talking to her bf about me she said my name and he said who is Elisha, my sister went off at him because he didnt know who i was, but thats our fault because we dont see each other, and only talk via text message. so my name wouldn't come up in conversation alot.

when i fist met my hubby i knew he had a brother but i didnt meet him till after a year of seeing my hubby and that was the first time my hubby seen him to then it was another year after that, then they worked on their relationship and see each other often.

sorry i know thats alot of useless information but i just wanted to tell you how the gap affected me and my husband.
i guess it depends of the family dynamics
just instilling family values helps alot i think
my parents did this, but we still drifted apart