How long did u stay in hospy after your 2nd/3rd etc birth?

**only1mica** · 29-04-2008 16:33

Hi all

Well after having my planned homebirth moved back to a birth centre...I am just wondering how long I should stay in hospy...

For my first I was in hospy for 2-3 days...but now I am going to have a 24 month old at home and I dont want her to be too disrupted by the whole 'birth'.

I really wanted the homebirth so now I want my DD to be at the birth centre with us...but I am just confused.

Part of me thinks I want to be back home the same or next day. But then another part thinks I should stay at hospy a little longer so I can recover a little.

How long were you away from home for your 2nd/3rd births and was it enough/not enough?

Thanks!
Mic

**Kells** · 29-04-2008 16:39

2nd birth - Came home day 3 - missed my 19 month old too much, and like you, felt guilty at disrupting him. Had a nurse out for days 4 and 5 to check on me though (and should have stayed in cos I had a hormonal breakdown during this time!

). I also dont think I recovered as quickly 'downstairs' cos of the bending and lifting with a toddler.

3rd birth - Bub needed to have surgery so we waited around for 5 days. My other two were 4 and 6 though, and it was a great rest.

It really allowed me to bond with the new baby straight away. (I didnt do this at first with the 2nd baby as I felt too guilty for no 1). My other kids came in every day to see us, and they had a great holiday with Nanny!

4th birth - tomorrow

I am going in at 8am and plan to come home hopefully on Sat or Sun, all going well, preferably Saturday. This is mainly cos I again feel guilty for my toddler!

Motherguilt hey!

**MumOf4Monsters** · 29-04-2008 16:57

I had my 3rd ds at home. I had planned for the other 2 kids to be there for the birth but unfortunately they were asleep and missed it. It was great to be home with the other kids.

I can remember being in the hospital after dd2 was born and just balling my eyes out because i felt so bad for leaving ds. I felt like he would think that mummy had left him to be with the new baby, which is one of the reasons that i chose to have ds3 at home.

I had ds4 in the hospital but i only stayed in 4 hours, which was the minimun stay. I was nagging the middies to let me go home straight after the placenta was out

. They all (doctors & midwives) thought that i was mad for wanting to go home so early. I told them that i had three other kids at home, and that i wanted to go home to be with them. They thought that that was more of a reason to stay in hospital

You will know once you have had bubs weather you are ready to go straight home or if you need a couple of days to recover. You don't need to set anything in stone at the moment, just take it as it comes.

Oh and i think it would be a lovely experience for your dd to witness the birth. Are you planning on having anyone else at the birth other than your dh?

**MumOf4Monsters** · 29-04-2008 17:00

Originally Posted by Kells

2nd birth - Came home day 3 - missed my 19 month old too much, and like you, felt guilty at disrupting him. Had a nurse out for days 4 and 5 to check on me though (and should have stayed in cos I had a hormonal breakdown during this time!

). I also dont think I recovered as quickly 'downstairs' cos of the bending and lifting with a toddler.

3rd birth - Bub needed to have surgery so we waited around for 5 days. My other two were 4 and 6 though, and it was a great rest.

It really allowed me to bond with the new baby straight away. (I didnt do this at first with the 2nd baby as I felt too guilty for no 1). My other kids came in every day to see us, and they had a great holiday with Nanny!

4th birth - tomorrow

I am going in at 8am and plan to come home hopefully on Sat or Sun, all going well, preferably Saturday. This is mainly cos I again feel guilty for my toddler!

Motherguilt hey!

Kells -

Wishing you luck for the arrival of number 4 tomorrow!!!

**only1mica** · 30-04-2008 09:21

**bump**

**Seekrit** · 30-04-2008 09:29

Thank you for making this post

Me, the over-planner extraordinaire isn't even TTC or pregnant BUT have been thinking about this..
Like you, I want to birth centre and be home the same or the next day... but I do worry... I didn't have real problems BFing Cobes in the early days, but I did make a trip to the nursery in the middle of the night as he wasn't feeding from one side that as day 2 I think... I also remember being a bit distressed when he wouldn't sleep day 2... but my concern was more for the nearby people trying to sleep than anything else.

So I'm no help at all, just wanting to put in my 2 cents, my thank you and now am subscribed so I can watch

**only1mica** · 30-04-2008 10:16

lol seek....we will see if anyone else replies

**bluey** · 30-04-2008 10:58

DD2 - I had to stay a week after delivery - she was early and I wasn't going home without her.
DD1 - 5 days - the older girls were big 10 and 13, so it wasn't an issue - they were at school all day anyways.
DD3 - 36 hours, I'd had enough I wanted home.

I think it depends on the situation, how you feel at the time, how you recover, so just take it as it comes, and decide after bubs has been born.

**jayisa02** · 30-04-2008 11:12

with DS i stayed 7 nights
with DD i stayed 5 nights (but would have stayed longer if they let me because i didnt feel ready and was having trouble bf)

DS was 4 1/2 when DD was born and stayed with Nanna. I didnt worry about him as he would move in with nanna if he could!!

I had 2 c/s though so its probably different if you have a natural birth.

**Mirad3k** · 30-04-2008 11:18

With DS1 12 years ago I stayed for the 3 days
With DD 9 years ago I stayed for 1 day
With DS2 1 month ago I went home same day.
All kids birthed at a public hospital.
I found it was much easier to come home early and get settled using all our own stuff. However I wouldn't have done it if I knew that I wasn't going to be able to relax and recover properly. I had lots of support from DH and the older kids which let me and bubs just rest and get used to each other