Should I put away the ironing board!

**naiwen** · 11-10-2007 14:42

Okay here goes,
DH is currently working very hard at his new job, he does not got home on weeknights until the following times:
Mon:he flies down to sydney office and gets home from the airport 10pm
Tue: goes to the gym after work 9.30pm
Wed: ususally works late at brisbane office 8.30pm
Thur: Goes to gym after work 9.30pm
Friday goes to pub with work mates 10.00pm

DS is only very little and has been in and out of hospital and DH does not really see him at all during the week. I am really worried that he will not grow up close to his dad if he does not see much of and I am really tired from never having a break.
So each night he Irons his shirt for the next day and the leaves the ironing board and iron out in the living room

I am very tired of putting it away each morning, should I ask him to put it away at night even though he usually says he will need it again tommorw so what is the point?
What do you think ladies sorry for the long post but I feel much better now!

**lavenderpegasus** · 11-10-2007 14:46

I would get him to put it away, yes he may need it the next day but it is somehting small that he can do to make your day easier. I'm sure you use the milk everyday yet you still put it away...

I hope this helps

LP in WA

**westerner** · 11-10-2007 14:55

If i were you i would pick my battles..

Putting the ironing board away each morning would take 30 secs and IMO not that big a deal..
The battle i would rather 'get into' would be talking to him and asking him to skip the gym on Tuesdays so he can spend some time with his son and partner (im sure he could do some exercises at home after his DS is in bed and he has spent some time with you if its that important to him) and perhaps working out that he only goes to the pub on Friday every fortnight instead of every week..
Talk to him about the importance of more family time and how it makes you feel..

At the end of the day the ironing board issue may frustrate you but him putting it away isnt going to change much is it??
I personally would prefer to put it away each morning if it meant perhaps him spending some more time at home..

JMO..

I think you need to choose your battles with things that really matter..

**sam's mum** · 11-10-2007 14:58

not to be a pain, but does it need to go away?

we leave ours out. it is in the corner behind the lounge chairs and this means that it is easier for me to fit in a bit of ironing time when I get a chance. It is blocked off so DS2 can't get to it.

**chicken** · 11-10-2007 15:02

Originally Posted by goose

If i were you i would pick my battles..

Putting the ironing board away each morning would take 30 secs and IMO not that big a deal..
The battle i would rather 'get into' would be talking to him and asking him to skip the gym on Tuesdays so he can spend some time with his son and partner (im sure he could do some exercises at home after his DS is in bed and he has spent some time with you if its that important to him) and perhaps working out that he only goes to the pub on Friday every fortnight instead of every week..
Talk to him about the importance of more family time and how it makes you feel..

At the end of the day the ironing board issue may frustrate you but him putting it away isnt going to change much is it??
I personally would prefer to put it away each morning if it meant perhaps him spending some more time at home..

JMO..

I think you need to choose your battles with things that really matter..

I totally agree. If you are a SAHM, why don't you iron all his shirts for the week and that way you wouldn't have an issue with putting the ironing board away each morning. Perhaps he's trying to give you a hint by not putting it away? My DH always did his own when we were both working, but now that I'm a SAHM for the time being, I figure I've got the time to do it for him.

I think the bigger issue is why your DH is happy to spend so much time away from your DS, doing his 'old life' things. My DS is 9 weeks old and my DH rushes home from work each day to see us (and he finishes at 3pm) and has only been to the pub once since DS was born (grand final day), and I even gave him grief for that! I definitely think this is a more important 'battle' to have.

**missie_mack** · 11-10-2007 15:05

Originally Posted by goose

If i were you i would pick my battles..

Putting the ironing board away each morning would take 30 secs and IMO not that big a deal..
The battle i would rather 'get into' would be talking to him and asking him to skip the gym on Tuesdays so he can spend some time with his son and partner (im sure he could do some exercises at home after his DS is in bed and he has spent some time with you if its that important to him) and perhaps working out that he only goes to the pub on Friday every fortnight instead of every week..
Talk to him about the importance of more family time and how it makes you feel..

At the end of the day the ironing board issue may frustrate you but him putting it away isnt going to change much is it??
I personally would prefer to put it away each morning if it meant perhaps him spending some more time at home..

JMO..

I think you need to choose your battles with things that really matter..

I agree

if you ask him about both he will just claim you are whining. Start with the bigger more important issue and suggest the other later.

**jlrjyeboah** · 11-10-2007 15:48

I would say the bigger issue is your DH not being around much.

Our ironing board is in our room, so DH can iron his shirts before bed and its away from the kids. I wouldn't complain about the ironing board, as others have said, choose your battles.

**floggadog** · 11-10-2007 15:58

Hmmm, all I'll say is when your son gets to crawling age let your hubby know the danger of leaving an iron sitting on top of an ironing board.
Wouldn't be a nice outcome if the inevitable happened.
& buy your hubby a home gym for chrissy

**Areca** · 11-10-2007 16:11

Well my Dh works 10+ hours a day and goes to the gym when he can fit it in but he still irons all his own clothes and puts the ironing board away when he's done (and it's in our walk in robe so out of the kids way). He doesn't have to do much around the house cause of his work hours but with a little kid running around I wouldn't iron unless she was asleep (too dangerous imo) and I aint spending her nap time ironing!!!

We iron our clothes each day, as we need them, and I iron the kids clothes with mine. The last one to use it packs it away.

I do think you need to talk to your hubby about the time he is missing from his kids though. DH goes to the gym either in his lunch break or he gets up and goes at 6.30am so that he can come home and spend dinner and bath time with his kids, before going back to work at least 3 nights a week. Sounds like your hubby needs to find the balance between his old life and his new life but you're right, he is missing out on valuable time with his child....time he'll never ever get back!

**Abi'smum** · 11-10-2007 17:43

Hi there

Firstly

. I know men can be frustrating

, but i agree with everyone eho says pick your battles. Dh goes the gym a couple of days a week before work, and works a long day, often not home before 8 pm (after DD bedtime), but I figure, hes generally at home to help on the weekend. I am not that big on social outings at the moment (too busy feeling like a heffer

, but DH is svery happy to look after DD if I want to have some me time. Just plan ahead, negociate (sp?) a day/time for you spend some time for yourself, or have a romantic dinner after bubs bedtime.

hope this helps