Visits from my Dad (who has passed)...

**kyeaj** · 10-02-2006 23:45

Not sure if this is the right place to post this or get some feedback but here goes....

Just recently, my Mum had a night where she couldn't sleep and was tossing and turning. It was around 3am and she felt like someone had sat next to her on the bed, she got very cold and couldn't turn around to look. When I asked her if she was scared, she said that she was "freaking out" but not scared. It was like she was frozen and couldn't look. Then after around 10min of her lying there (obviously still wondering what had just happened), the same thing happened again. This time she laid there and then got up after 10 min and walked around the house to try and brush it off!

The very next day I was about to head off to do some shopping when I got the urge to go to my Dad's grave. I haven't been there for around 6 years and all of a sudden decided to take my 7mth old there to "meet" his Pop. We went and sat there for around 15min where I had a little cry and introduced him to my dad that passed away just before I turned 2.

That night my Mum called me and told me what had happened to her. I found it quite strange that she did this as she is SO skeptical about these things. Then I told her about my urge to go to the cemetary. Then she "really" freaked out!

She then told me this week, that a girl at work had given her an aura and tarot card reading (not knowing what had happened to her). The first thing that she said was that she thought my Mum was divorced but then realised that she had been widowed. Then she said "he did it with his own hands adn it was no accident"... He commited suicide which my mum knew but found it eerie that she picked this up. She then went on to tell her that he had passed but hadn't yet moved on as he was waiting for her forgiveness.

I know that my Mum has had issues with this for years as she is angry at him for leaving us and especially that he left me without a father. Mum told her what had happened a few nights before and that I went to the cemetary. She was told that he had called on me to see if I was fine with everything but knew that she wasn't. When she asked "why now is this happening?" she was told that he thought it was the right time as I now had a son and that Mum didn't need to worry about me anymore as I would always "have someone" now. She said that he won't move on until he knows that Mum has forgiven him for what he did.

I really believe in all of this stuff and it all seems to make sense to me (obviously alot more goes with this). But I was just wondering if anyone has any thoughts as to what is going on here... Really interested to find out!

**reAllytee** · 11-02-2006 00:27

He seems like a lost soul.
But then my family still have my Dad visit them every now & then just to "check" on them so to speak especially my Mum as he was very protective of her.
Maybe your Mum needs to seek some answers as maybe she is harbouring too much anger etc from it all & who could blame her but maybe this is a sign she needs to move on now as there is something better or greater meant to happen with her life.
Anger like fear is a very bad emotion to hold onto it will drain away at your soul.
Its time she moves on & i think your meant to help her.

**rynosmum** · 11-02-2006 14:21

I had two instances of the same sort of 'awake nightmare' in an old house we had.

Both times, I believed that I had woken up but was frozen and couldn't move. I felt someone in the room with me, could make out a shadow but I couldn't move or scream.

Reading your post has brought it all back now - it's a truly scary feeling.

**Maxs_MumMy** · 11-02-2006 14:54

Late last year by dad committed sucide and these visions i have every now and again....though my dad lived in spain, so very rarely saw him but i have the visions....scary...

I thought i saw him standing in my kitchen the other night...werid..

So i understand what your mum is going thru....Werid, scary, freaking all in one.

Hope she finds peace for herself and your dad...

**Angelmist♥** · 11-02-2006 15:42

Hi Kye, it sounds like your Dad truly wants to move on now, and just wanted to check up on you guys

Your poor mother, it sounds like she's had to deal with quite alot.I have had 4 very close people to me commit suicide, and in my opinion it is very hard to forgive them (uncle, cousin, one of my best friends and an ex who I was still close to). I could not imagine if it was the father of my child.

My cousin and my ex came and visited "afterwards" and although I was still very angry,hurt and confused....I told them it was time for them to move on.Sorry but OMG I sound like a freak!Lol it's weird actually writing it down.

Maybe your mum could visit his grave and if she can't forgive him (which I can totally understand)maybe tell him that.As in "I can't forgive you for leaving us, but I do think it's time you moved on as I need to move on with my life too".

I'm sorry I really don't know, it's a very tough one.But please let us know what happens.

**cosmic** · 11-02-2006 16:25

Kye,

I had a similar experience about 10 years ago when my father passed away. I never really knew him very well and frankly, didn't think much of him. Anyway, about 6mths after he died I saw a psychic who basically told me that my father had not passed over and that he couldnt' move on until he had my forgiveness. I instantly felt SO bad that I had caused him to be stuck but also didn't know how I could forgive him (it's easy to say, but how do you know you've really done it in your heart iykwim?). Anyway, before the end of the session, the psychic said to me.. "you've already started to forgive him" (I personally don't know how he knew that because I felt no different).

About another 3mths later I had to go back and see him again because I couldn't stand to not know if my father was still 'stuck' so it was the first question I asked. He told me that it is his job to help them cross over and that he had moved my father on after our first session.

It is my understanding that when they are stuck, they are here (somewhere anyway.. this psychic guy called it a 'dark place') all the time but when they pass over, they can still come back and forth as much as they want so they can actually still visit us.

Oh.. and just out of interest, when I was going through a really stressful time a few years after that and not sleeping much at all, I had the experience of someone sitting on the bed next to me several times. And yes, it is very, very creepy!!! I also had a total out of body experience, where I was at my ceiling looking down at myself lying in bed. Talk about scary! Of course I thought I was dead.

**C2H5OH** · 15-02-2006 22:52

kyeaj, that sounds interesting.

He will wait until she genuinely forgives him i should imagine, so it can't just be a "oh yes ok, i forgive you" it has to be from the heart.

I'm not sure what the spiritual repurcussions for suicide are (its different to each religion i suppose).

It seems like your mother was in a sub-conscious state of mind, ie, he might not have been in this realm, but your mother might have connected with him in some way.

**kyeaj** · 15-02-2006 23:10

Originally Posted by C2H5OH

I'm not sure what the spiritual repurcussions for suicide are (its different to each religion i suppose).

Interesting that you should say that as I've heard that if you commit suicide then you end up in limbo - not sure... He was catholic but my mother and I don' t practice any form of religion.

Funnily enough, after all of this I have felt that he is around at times (not sure if it's because I'm thinking about it though??)...

Hopefully going to a medium soon... Mum's not too keen yet but I would like to go myself just to see what's going on.

Thanks for all the replies, really appreciate it!

**Blessed Mum** · 21-02-2006 22:28

Kyeaj

Kust wanted to say I agree with what C2H5OH said about the forgiveness thing. I won't go into details but I know this to be very true and true forgiveness in my experience isn't something we control it takes place usually without us being aware of it. Its a moment that occurs and when I say moment it doesn't mean it happens quickly. Rambling again

.............

. *SORRY*

**kyeaj** · 24-02-2006 23:58

Thanks tara25... I agree also.

I think that all of this is actually making my Mum realise that she hasn't accepted all of this and maybe still hasn't forgiven him... Maybe this is the beginning of that long road you talk about. Time will tell I guess...

Got the number for the medium though as strange things are still happening to both of us, just need to wait until we're both free to go together. I suppose it's a good sign that she wants to go now (seeing as she is so skeptical about all of this stuff).

She actually called me the other day to tell me that she had the same thing happen to her again, although this time much stronger and that she wanted me to get the number as she felt she needed to go to find out what was going on and try to put an end to it. I still somehow feel that she needs to accept a few things first, but maybe that's why she wants to go... We'll soon see!