number 4

[Crazy Bananas]

I would just like to know if when you annouced you were having baby number 4 if people were happy for you or just put you down. just like to know what i may be in for.I think i maybe pregnant with number 4. I quite sick of defending myself about having 3 children .
Any advice would be welcome.

[punkbaby]

When you do find an answer feel free to let me know I am astounded at the look on peoples faces when i am out with just dd and (obviously pregnant) someone will say oh whens number 2 due, i pay my belly and say Ohh this is number 4....there smile quickly drops! I even get worse looks when i had dhs son (his 14 and we have him fortnightly) and they see i have 4 kids and one on the way.

Wish people would keep their dirty looks to themselves or not look at all, or say anything for that matter!

Your not the only one....I have had the old "oh wow your going again isnt three enough" this is from family...."how will you school them?" Oh they will go public why do you ask??? Cant see the point in spending 20k a year for schooling really can you?

This soon shuts them up

Good luck with your pregnancy

[Crazy Bananas]

Thanks for your reply. Not sure if pregnant or not yet still have 11 days till testing. Just getting a few symptoms. I'm more worried about peoples rude comments than the thought of having number 4

[punkbaby]

Dont let it bother you you have to learn to just turn a blind eye to it watch everyone coo when the baby comes its forgotten then

good luck

[anscje]

I'm really sorry that your feeling worried about what people say.

I'm on the opposite scale to you, where I only have 1 DS and we are not having anymore and I get the same looks from people when they ask when the next one is coming and I say "there isn't going to be a next".

It's quite sad that people no matter how many children you have always try to put a negative on things.

I think it's lovely if someone has just one child, or has 10!

No matter what they say ignore them and enjoy your pregnancy and your children

[punkbaby]

wouldnt it be nice if people just shut their mouth sometimes anscje bottom line is we have as many kids as we want to wether it be 1 or 10.....because WE want too, not becuase it suits them LOL wish they would work that out

[mrsd]

As someone who is fortunate enough to be having no. 7 (hubby and I differ slightly on this point!), I wondered what people would say to me - maybe that's what he was worried about, too.

Generally, people in our community know us pretty well and, what ever they may say in private, they've been pretty nice to my face with lots of "I don't know how you do it - I struggle with 1/2"s etc. A couple have tried the old "Don't you have a TV / know what's causing it?" etc but it tends to be older men more, I've found.

When people comment on how many kids we have, I usually say "Aren't I blessed ?" and I've found that it's been the most effective method of stopping negative comments I've tried. People don't seem to want to rain on your parade too much so if you appear positive and upbeat, they're too scared to say anything derogatory.

Good luck, though - if you are having no. 4, that's wonderful. You'll be an experienced mum so your little one will have a better-than-average chance of doing okay, in my opinion. And I've foudn that they get better as you go - or you're so experienced that nothing throws you ! Either way, I hope everything turns out for you.

NB. When you look at the no. of poor folk who are attempting IVF for one child with limited success, we ARE blessed!