http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/ en Wed, 19 Jun 2013 09:19:14 GMT vBulletin 10 http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/images/styles/BubHub/misc/rss.png http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/ http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?498211-Dont-want-to-disappoint-DP&goto=newpost Thu, 13 Jun 2013 13:17:55 GMT Dp had a rough childhood. His parents were always promising him the world and then letting him down... This hasn't changed even now he is older.
I'm continuously seeing him be disappointed and let down by his mum, and as tough as he try's to act all okay, but I can see how devastated he gets.

After speaking one of his step sisters, she pretty much pointed out that I'm holding myself back because I'm scared to disappoint him (ie don't want to be like his mum, getting hopes up only to disappoint him)
I have 2 businesses - which iv basically stopped operating because I'm too scared to take risks/try new things/ operate etc because I'm just to worried that I will fail and disappoint him.

It sounds stupid to me even writing in here (I feel pathetic for feeling like this)

Any suggestions? Or should I just "grow some" and get over myself :(

Thanks ]]> trying4no2 http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?498211-Dont-want-to-disappoint-DP http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497989-Confused&goto=newpost Tue, 11 Jun 2013 03:20:28 GMT I have been talking to mil this morning who informed me she got a note on her door early this morning that said that my mum has had some serious health issues arise and would like to get in contact with me.
I haven't seen or spoken to any of my family in 2 years they have none of my contact details, no numbers, no address ( we moved like 12 hours away) and the only way to get in contact is through mil as she has been at the same address for over 10 years.

I'm feeling very confused, I mean the things my mum and family did for me to cut all ties was terrible and I promised myself never ever again. About a year ago they also left a note saying my pop had had a stroke and was at a certain hospital should I wish to contact him. Well I did and they had no recognition of him being admitted at all. Then I tried ringing my nana home number (she's had the Same number for as long as I can remember ) and my nan answered and I asked her if pop was ok that I had tried ringing the hospital an they said he wasn't there and she just laughed and hung up.

Do I take this seriously?
I'm so confused on one hand despite everything if it is real I'm sad, upset yet apart of me doesn't believe it's real, doesn't want to waste Time and energy finding out if it is.
I don't want to be sucked into the silly games if this infact is one.

I've been sucked into these games before, I've been manipulated and hurt by her before. Is it wrong that I don't believe it and that even if it true no matter how upsetting that I still don't want any contact with her?



Me(21)+DH(25)+DS(4)+DD(2)
Tank(mastiff x)+Echo(oz cattle) ]]> MonsterMoosMum http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497989-Confused http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497853-Very-lazy-husband-I-m-at-the-end-of-my-rope&goto=newpost Sun, 09 Jun 2013 04:00:14 GMT *Background:* Together 17 years. We have a 16yo and a 13yo. We only got married a couple of years ago. He was a workaholic but two years ago moved to another work location and the hours are far more family friendly. He is overweight and has undiagnosed sleep apnoea. I work a few (between five... Background:

Together 17 years. We have a 16yo and a 13yo. We only got married a couple of years ago. He was a workaholic but two years ago moved to another work location and the hours are far more family friendly. He is overweight and has undiagnosed sleep apnoea. I work a few (between five and 25 hours a week). I'm one of the few who enjoy housework, I do not want him doing housework. I want him to work on his car, play in his garage with his tools, tidy the yard.

The Problem:

He is lazy with a capital L. He pulls all sorts of tricks to get out of doing any physical labour. The excuses are plentiful. And when he does actually do something it is nearly always only half finished.

It took him two weeks to half paint the outside of the house three years ago. The excuses were "I'll wait until the sun gets off that side" and then his holidays finished and he had to go back to work.

The lawns get left "they're too wet to mow" when all the neighbours have managed to get theirs mowed that day.

He installed blinds in the kitchen and dining windows OK but when it came to the blind in Mr 16's room the clips at the bottom of the blind didn't get installed. Nothing is EVER 100% completed.

His drill is always flat. (Note: I did take to putting it on the charger on Friday's to combat that excuse) The hardware store is never open on weekends and of course he doesn't have something that he needs to do the job I've asked him to do.

He always finds an excuse to get out of doing something I want him to do. For example he must research accommodation or flights on a Sunday afternoon, instead of doing yard work and then using the computer after dark.

If we get up on a weekend and it's raining he says "aww it's raining" barely concealing his excitement at the prospect of sitting in the chair all day. (This isn't imagined, my best friend witnessed it one day and confirmed he was pleased it was too wet to do anything in the yard)

The yard is a mess, I send him out to clean it up and all he does is move stuff around the yard and just neatens up piles of stuff in his garage.

He starts doing the dishes, he only does half of them and leaves the dishes to air dry and mucky water in the sink with dishes still in it.

Yesterday he managed to do half of the dishes and half dig out three tree stumps for the entire day. He went out half way through digging the stumps. His dad is sick and now he's visiting the inlaws every day he isn't at work. Which is fair enough, but he could visit them in the evening?

He's not ticked a single thing off his honey-do list since April. I always have to ask him to do something twice. I once did my nut with him and asked him twice to do something in the same breath and he got shirty saying I didn't give him a chance I replied "well I always have to ask twice so I'm just getting it said twice so you'll get moving"

I've tried asking him on a Friday night "what are your plans for the weekend" and he's non committal. He'll go fishing to get out of doing anything, he doesn't even really like fishing. He has a project car he's too lazy to work on. He goes out and leans against the car and pulls out his phone and does "research" on gumtree. Every time I tell him to work on his car he spends 8 hours straight on the internet.

He nicks off to the supermarket for an hour to just grab a couple of things.

I've straight told him he makes me nag. I hate nagging. I don't want to nag. I've become a nagger and I hate myself for nagging. What do I do?

TL;DR
My husband avoids doing anything physical. ]]> singloud http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497853-Very-lazy-husband-I-m-at-the-end-of-my-rope http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497673-Can-I-report-her&goto=newpost Thu, 06 Jun 2013 11:39:37 GMT I went to school with this girl, we're not close now but if I see her around I'll say hi and have a chat. Anyway she has 2 children, I think one is 5 and the other is 2 or 3, and I have heard from 2 different (fairly reliable) sources that she and her new boyfriend smoke weed several times a week while the children are in the house (apparently they are in a different room while they are doing it, I assume at night while they are in bed but not sure)
Can I report this to dhs or someone? I don't have any other information other than that. I don't know if the children are being neglected or anything in any other way but I keep thinking about it and I would hate to hear that something happened to them and I knew but did nothing.

Also on a different note I'm fairly sure she is defrauding centrelink claiming single parenting but her new boyfriend is living there. ]]> haveheart http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?497673-Can-I-report-her