sleep and awake times?

[proud_mama]

My 4 week old DS is very stubborn when it comes to getting to sleep. I can tell he is over tired because he gets all jerky and sooky. I try everything to get him to dift to sleep. BF, check his nappy, Dummy, Rocking, walking, wrapping, and he drifts off not a problem, but its keeping him asleep thats the problem!

Today worried me because he was awake from 12.30 lunch till 6.30pm!:eek: thats a long time for a little bubs, and even when he did finaly go to sleep he was only asleep for an hr and a half! and he's been awake since 8 and is still awake atm and it's 11pm. I thought little babies were ment to sleep 16 hrs? My DS is awake more than he is asleep during the day, and this causes him to be grumpy all day because he is so tired and restless.

Can anyone help me? Or does anyone have any ideas as to what i can do?

[JanetF]

Babies sleep how they sleep, there is no one right way for them to do it :) At 4 weeks your baby isn't stubborn, he's just working out how to use his new body and all the stuff that goes with it. He doesn't know there's such a thing as sleep at all LOL. Try watching for the signs before the signs you're currently perceiving and maybe trying then. The average sleep cycle is 45 mins for babies which gets longer as they get older. They only sleep lightly in the first few weeks of life which seems to be a protective mechanism so they don't forget to breathe. Try putting him in a sling so he's getting the familiar movement he had when he was in the womb. Your heartbeat will also reassure him and your voice will help soothe him too. Basically babies need to be parented to sleep so keep that up :) He needs you to do that. His sleep patterns will change enormously over the next few years and he'll rarely have the same habits for a month or so. You just need to watch his needs and support him in them. He'll work it out soon! Get some daylight with him too so he has some extra help sorting out day from night as he would still have no idea about that.

[Tizi]

Hi

You must be very frustrated:(

I know how you feel. My bubs was the same at that age (come to think of it both my boys were like that!). The only thing that really helped him to sleep was when he was in the baby sling. I would put him in it and walk around the house doing chores etc and he would doze off to sleep. Although I couldn't put him in his cot when he fell asleep because he would wake up so I would leave him in it.

He has grown out of it though... he sleeps fine in his cot now. I think they just want to be close to their mummy. Once they feel secure enough to let go they will.

Hope this helps

[reAllytee]

Id also have to say try a sling/baby carrier as maybe he just wants to be close to his mum ! I had this problem with my bubs i would often just sit & cry over him not sleeping etc especially when i was told what bubs "should" be doing ! As JanetF said every babe is different you just have to try & work out what bubs want so to speak. I used to find it was easier the sooner i noticed bubs clenching his fists as this made putting him off to sleep a lot simpler as he wasnt over tired. Have you tried even using a rocker to get him off to sleep ? This was my savour also so if i wasnt carrying bubs around he was in his rocker which was really good cause if he started to stir i could just rock him & he would re-settle.
Just try & stay calm easier said than done i know but the more stressed you become the more bubs will pick up on it. He will settle into his own little routine soon enough.
Wishing you the best :)

[JnA]

Some very good advice. I hope your baby gets to sleep soon and you too.

When Jade was doing this someone said to put them in the car and go for a drive.. I would never do this because
1. they'll probably wake up when you get them out of the car.
2. I don't want to set a pattern of going to sleep only in the car and
3. And the most important IMO a tired and stressed woman at the wheel of a car is not a good combination.


Sorry I only gave you what not to do.. I'm not very useful really.

[kuz78au]

Hi there! Congrats on the new bub! Your boy was born a day before mine! And I love the name! :D

I'm thinking the same thing with my boy at the moment because there is no logical sleeping pattern whatsoever! And he changes all the time so things that worked yesterday usually don't work today! We found their was no use fighting it and just to go with the flow!

I found this really good way to get him off to sleep last night, I wrapped him up in cotton blankie, took off my shirt & bra and layed his head on my chest to hear my heart and for a bit of skin-to-skin closeness. He settled down pretty quickly and I was able to put him in the bassinett and walk away. Other things we have tried are: not wrapping his arms, massage and bath. Plus don't forget to keep trying to wind him, sometimes this can keep them awake too. Other than patting/rubbing his back for winding, you can also try a warm rolled sheet/pad over his tummy.

Also have to mention, our bub makes so much noise when he sleeps that we think he is awake but he actually isn't! He makes different noises (including a cry!) and does this about evey 5-10mins! I used to go in and get him up when he was still kind of asleep so he was getting used to waking up all the time! It took me a while to know that him being so noisy was normal! Plays havoc with me being a light sleeper though! :(

I hope this has helped!! Good luck! :D

[Kaileysmum]

Hey

My bub was like that at 4 weeks too. Its very hard as you want them to sleep as they are so tired and crabby. I personally think there is nothing you can do, as he probably is just trying to sort himself out when it comes to sleep. But if he is anything like my bub it gets better, dd now sleeps 4 to 6 hrs in the day, and sleeps through the night (8pm to 6am). Hope it all works out for you as its very tiring for you, and bub.

[Kaileysmum]

Id also just like to add, that if you can get hold of a swinging cradle they are wonderful as you can rock bub to sleep in bed, that was when he go's to sleep you dont have to move him. I had one for dd and it helped, to get her to sleep, as if I rocked her to sleep in my arms, she'd wake as Id put her to bed. Hope this helps.

P.S I agree that you should stay as calm, and non stressed as possible as bub will pick that up and carry on worse, they like positive energy.

[Crazy Monkey]

My little man was the same, he spent a lot of time awake (& crying) and getting him to sleep was a real chore.. Not matter what we did, it didn't work... He was actually diagnosised with slient reflux, which is why he spent a lot of time crying... Once we started treating him for reflux he was much happier and the sleep imporived a little but he still wasn't sleeping as much as other babies his age... But the difference was he was happy, so I wasn't so stressed that he was awake... DS still doesn't sleep much during the day, lucky to get 2 sleeps totalling 2.5-3 hours sleep...

Good luck

[justmum]

At six weeks i got a sleep consultant in and learnt how to settle my bubs in his basinette rather than in arms. basically patting him to sleep the first few days and then gradually patting him less and less. Now at 12 weeks, i put him onto his cot and walk away. he usually gets himself off to sleep now without any probs (maybe one quick little settle).

What I learnt was that a tired baby will wake up after fgalling asleep. If you can get your baby to sleep when first tired (listen for the first grizzle, like a cough) then the chances of getting, and staying, asleep really improve.

I spent weeks with my little man in a sling. i was so exhausted that I would fall asleep with him in the baby bjorn (strpped to my front)! I found that by persevering with the settling that I now have a great sleeper.

Hope this helps.