update on hayden~failing lungs

[the_original_duchess]

he has gone from bad to worse. he is no longer feeding. when he is awake his chest comes in completely and he struggles to breath. he vomits his tube feeds and is always sleeping.
they know that there is something wrong. so they are going to put a camera down his throat on thursday, do scans and xrays on wednesday, and might have to send him for an mri at westmead at some point this week.
they said worst case scenario is that his lungs will completely fail, and he will need a transplant, and if they cannot find a suitable donor he might die.
i dont want to loose my baby, god i have lost so much in these past months, what did i do? it is not fair. i just want to hit somone. howcan god be so cruel? how can his father still be going away this weekend and turning his phone off. what if hayden dies, and no one can reach him for days?
what if grant is his only suitable donor for blood, or something else and he just neglects that coz he is too busy partying.
its just not fair, im loosing it, i honestly am. i cant take anymore bad news. i couldnt physically get out of bed last night to get to my kids who were screaming. i just hate everything right now, i hate the world, i ate the fact that i cant do anything to help my son, or my other children, i hate that im loosing my mind. and i hate the man i married, no i dont hate that man, i hate the man he has become......
please pray for my son, please pray that we will get through this.
Danielle

[luckymama]

Danielle, i am so sorry you have to go through this, you have been through enough :hugs:
I am really really hoping for you that Hayden is going to be ok :fingerscrossed:

[shellsbubs]

:hugs: my thoughts are with you and hope your little boy gets stronger soon.

[Pippi Longstocking]

Oh Danielle! :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Mahjong]

OMG, I am so sorry :(

[Lunar]

Oh Honey!!!!
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Please stay positive for your bubba!
He needs you right!
Please get someone to take you to him and look after J & J so you can be with him.

Is there anyone you can talk to? Anyone that can be with you and help you with the kids for a while?

Hayden is in my prayers, poor lil bubba.
He will pull through, he's a fighter like his mum!

hugs!

[whatwasithinking]

Oh Danielle.

The tears are streaming down my face.

How awful what you have been through over the last couple of months.

I pray to god that Hayden will pull through this and will get better soon. I pray to god that you are OK and have the family support that you so desperately need.

Millions of hugs :hugs: , millions of kissess :kiss: and a billion prays :fingerscrossed: sent your way today is the best I can offer you.

[RedPanda]

Danielle, I am so sorry for what you're going through. You and your dear little son will be in my thoughts and prayers. :hugs:

[sexy_minx]

Ill be thinking of you and ur baby :kiss: :hugs:

[Leeny]

:hugs:...I cant say anything to make you feel better, but I really hope things get better for you soon :hugs:

[sueliz]

You and your family - in particular young Hayden are in my thoughts and prayers. :hugs:

[bronny-jane]

:hugs: i hope he's ok, and they help him soon:( and i hope you feel better soon too:hugs:

and i hope your ex gets his a$$ kicked:mad: how selfish

[Little Gorilla]

Poor wee thing....hope he starts improving very soon...you are such a strong woman Danielle...I truely don't think I could have ever coped with everything you have had to go through recently...you are inspiring to others, especially younger mums, going through tough times:hugs: :hugs:

[nessaw1978]

I am here, crying for you and your family. I am so sorry that you are having to go through this.

What an awful situation to be in. I pray that God gives you strength to get through this awful time, and that he lays his healing hand on dear Hayden's lungs.

I see that you're wanting to find someone to take your anger out on at the moment.

Your husband also seems to be struggling with things and maybe his only way of dealing with the hurt is to run away from things. Not that that is Ok, :shame: but humans are interesting beings and our behaviours are not always predictable. I also pray that he comes to his senses and stays around to support you and your children.

If you need to chat please pm me and I will do my best to listen. I can't promise to say much but I will listen.

:hugs:

You are in my prayers

Vanessa

[danielle13]

Oh Danielle :hugs:

I am so sorry things aren't going well for your little man. I don't really know what to say, just that I hope with all of my heart that he, and you, pull through this.

You have been through so much lately, I commend you on your strength so far. I know you don't FEEL strong, but you are :hugs:

I strongly suggest getting someone to have a stern word with Grant, he is being so disgustingly selfish right now it sickens me that he is planning on going away whilst your little man's life hangs in the balance. :shame:

Remember if you need anything AT ALL please let me know. I mean that.

[natasha]

Poor wee thing....hope he starts improving very soon...you are such a strong woman Danielle...I truely don't think I could have ever coped with everything you have had to go through recently...you are inspiring to others, especially younger mums, going through tough times:hugs: :hugs:
What she said....:yes:


Big hugs to you....I really hope he starts getting better soon...:hugs:

[ziggie]

Danielle, I am so sorry. No one deserves to go through everything that has hit you in the past few months. I will pray my heart out for you, and little Hayden :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: .

[Mariposa]

Danielle, Im sorry to hear what you are going through. I hope it all works out soon for you, and I hope it all works out for your baby boy also.

:hugs:

[LittleBoysRock]

:hugs: I just wanted to give you a hug and tell you I think your amazing, you have gone through so much lately. Stay positive. I really hope your little man gets better soon. :hugs:

[Oscar's mum]

Sending hugs your way:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: I hope they discover what is wrong with Hayden very soon and fix it.

[jorey]

thinking of you and your baby boy Hayden! lots of:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[HoopDeeDoo]

I really hope things start to turn around for you, because surely you've been through enough already :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Sazeby]

Hi there.

I'm so sorry to hear you're going through such a horrible time.
I wish i could help but i'm not sure i could be of much use.
Please try and stay positive for your baby boy i know thats like asking a pig to fly right at the moment.
I'm sending plenty of healthy, happy positive vibes your way and also plenty of these:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[xpress2]

Sorry to hear what you are going through :hugs:

[Nickster]

I'm so sorry for what you're going through right now Danielle. You have a huge load to carry. My thoughts are with you and your precious baby, I hope he recovers quickly and you can take him home.:hugs:

[andrewsmum]

I'm so sorry to hear this, been following your story lately - Hugs to you and your family. I pray that Hayden gets better :hugs:

[Eloise&Charlie'sMum]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: I only wish I could offer you more..our prayers are with you both xoxox

[V8]

Oh No! I am devastated for you to hear this. I am so utterly sorry, but you can be angry hun, but at the moment you need to be strong and be there for your beautiful son Hayden. I hope your family is able to support you through this, and i hope and pray for your beautiful Hayden to pull through this. :hugs:

[Lirael]

oh hun :hugs: almost the exact same thing happened with DS, but luckily it sorted itself out on its own with ALOT of rest and two weeks in hospy. I really hope the same happens with your little guy, and that you can take him home soon :hugs:

[Acacia]

Oh i am sending you and hayden all my love. I cant believe this is happening. if you need anything dont hesitate to ask.
:hugs:

[Angelmist♥]

Oh hun:hugs:. Be angry!I know I would be.You haven't done anything to deserve this at all.These things are sometimes sent to 'try us' as the saying goes.

Massive huge hugs for you and Hayden.:fingerscrossed: the little angel gets better really soon for you.

As for Grant well all I can say is :shame: on him.He's definitely showing his true colours.

We're all here for you hun:hugs:

[EmsMum72]

I'm so sorry to hear about the struggle your baby boy is having. When Hayden pulls through (which I pray he will) I think you should kick Grant's a** to the curb. If he's going to go away partying, drinking etc at a time like this when, as you said, he could be the only possible donor (let alone turn his phone off :banghead: ) then he doesn't deserve to have any of you in his life! What a d**k!!

Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you Danielle. You haven't had it easy lately that's for sure. :hugs: Hope Hayden keeps fighting and gets better soon.

[Roopee]

Oh love! Thats terrible news!

Your poor little boy and poor poor you!:hugs:

Nothing i say will make you feel better so i'll just send you alot of these:hugs::hugs::hugs:.

[Hilja]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:



Hilja

[Pobblebonk]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

I hope Hayden pulls though this. My heart is tearing up over your situation.

[Elfin]

Oh Danielle, I can't believe this is happening on top of everything else you are going through. Just praying that Hayden has a speedy recovery:hugs: :hugs:

[*Chels*]

Oh my gosh,Im so sorry you are going through this all.I hope lil Hayden pulls through this.Im sure he is just as strong as his mummy.:hugs:

[SweetSerenity]

Danielle im so sorry to hear of the news about Hayden.:(

I know life hasnt been nice to you in the past few weeks but just remember, this will make you stronger. As horrible as it is to go through, your strength will come through and get you and your children through this.

You are an inspiration to many, especially your children.

I will be praying for little hayden :hugs:

[Milliner]

Oh Danielle sending you lots of :hugs: I hope things take a turn for the best for you very soon. :hugs:

[Tulp]

:hugs: :hugs: It's terrible that you are going through this. Will pray for little Hayden and for you.

Shame on Grant for behaving the way he is.

[Kizmet]

babe i am so sorry :hugs: if there is anything at all i can do let me know :hugs: even if its just for me to come over and entertain justin & jess for a while :hugs:

He will pull through this hun he is strong and he is a fighter and is surrounded by so much mummy love :hugs:

[BlueButterfly]

:hugs: Im thinking of you and little Hayden at this time! I hope he gets better from this soon :hugs:

[angelickaren]

i am so sorry you have been though alot lately i hope all his tests this week are ok :hugs: to you at this time you are a strong and brave women :yes:
hayden will be in my thoughts :hugs:

[TwoBlue]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Your in my thoughts and prayers

[pookiesossige]

Ohh... I am so sorry you are going through this... I feel so bad for you. I just pray that little Hayden can pull through and that you can reach some resolution with your ex- and hopefully someone he'll listen too will tell him to wake up to himself :shame: I know we havn't talked before, but if you just need to let out some feelings, you can always PM me and I'll be all ears :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[~Emmylou~]

Oh gosh I'm so sorry sweetheart....
I'm thinking of you and your little man and hoping he comes through this :hugs:

[reAllytee]

Hun he is a fighter just like his mum !

Stay strong if there is anything we can do just yell ok !

There are many of us who can help you out even if in small ways !

We are all here for you :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Foxymoron]

Hugs to you and your little man. :hugs:
I'm so sorry you are going through this.

[wannabemum]

:hugs: Danielle I am praying for you and Hayden. I am sending love and light to his little lungs. :hugs:

I just drew a fairy card for him and you.....

"Empowerment": You're more powerful than you realize. It's safe for you to be powerful.

Meaning: You're no longer willing to see yourself as a victim in any way. It means letting go of all blame with respect to other people, past conditions, or present circumstances.

[Harmony83]

You and your family are in my thoughts :hugs:. I hope little hayden gets better soon and I am so so sorry you are going through such a rough time.
:hugs: :hugs:

[Mrs J]

Darl you don't deserve all this. I will be praying for your precious little Hayden, and i hope he gets through this. :fingerscrossed:

[GraceUnhearing]

Danielle :hugs: to you sweet

life just isnt fair!

i know its hard but try and stay positive sweet

you and hayden are me my thoughts :(

[madreader]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: Please know that you and your little baby are in our thoughts. :hugs:

[MandyM84]

Hi Danielle.. :) I hope hayden is alright.. If you need anything call me!!

[westerner]

Im so sorry you have to go through this sweetheart.. :hugs:

I hope that hayden makes a fast recovery and things sort themselves out..
I hope it does not turn into something serious..

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[SuperWoman]

:hugs: :hugs: Sending you my thoughts and prayers for you and your beautiful boy. So sorry you are going through this.:hugs: :hugs:

[Niki]

:hugs: :hugs: you and hayden are in my thoughts and prayers

[mumx3littlies]

I will be thinking of you and your kids and praying for your lil man to be ok at the end of this :hugs:

[Billy]

:hugs: Danielle, I am so sorry for everything you are going through. You and darling Hayden are in my thoughts and prayers. Please stay strong little man. :crying: :hugs: :hugs:

[Queen]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[bekkyboo]

:hugs: :kiss:

[mothertobein2007]

im so sorry big :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: i wish i could do something for you and your baby....you and your baby are in my thoughts

[rynosmum]

I really don't know what to say. I hope you get positive news on Thursday. :hugs: :fingerscrossed:

[mum2L]

:hugs: You, Hayden and your family are in my thoughts. :hugs: :hugs:

[Pixie]

I am so sad for you, sad for what you have gone through and are going through. Ask for help if you can from friends and family even if it's just to get a couple of hours sleep. I hope good news follows on Thursday...why Thursday can they not check sooner? God I hope everything will be OK :hugs::hugs:

[Kizmet]

I was talking to Dani earlier and Im pretty sure they have to wait until he is 2 weeks old which will be thursday-something to do with the anaesthetic but im not 100% sure

Sending you way more hugs than I can fit chicky :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Femme la Phoenix]

My heart goes out to you and your family, that all struggling with this news

I wish there was something more I could do
I don't like to hear this kind of new and just sit hear
typing away and not be able to something physically to ease your suffering right now.

I am thinking of you and your gorgeous son
as well as your family ~

I pray that everything goes well for Wednesday&Thursday
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[mom2jake]

Sending you lots and lots of :hugs:

My thoughts are with you and your gorgeous little boy...You need to stay strong, you are such a strong person and I know that you can get through this....:yes:

Your children need you to be strong and so does your little man in hospital....

I wish there was something I could do xx

[Bexta]

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[♥Heaven Sent♥]

Sending BIG well wishes and i will pray that he's lungs are ok and that he is healthy.

BIG hugs.

[ButterflyMama]

I'm praying for you both.. this is really sad, I'm sure he'll be a tough lil fighter and get through it, thinking of you.. :hugs:

[Beany]

Oh you poor thing :hugs:

I have everything crossed for good news this Thursday.

[Aquamarine]

Just know that my prayers are with your little Hayden and you at this difficult time.:angel:

Try to be as positive as you can. I can barely imagine how hard this may be for you.

God Bless little Hayden and may his body be healthy and well very soon.:yes: :hugs:

[Mum&bubs]

Oh darling :( I can't imagine what you must be going through at the moment.

I will pray for your little boy & I really hope his lungs are okay. Strong little boy he is!!

Your all in my thoughts, wishing you the best of luck! :hugs: :hugs:

[MountainGirl]

:hugs: to you and your kids,.... Hayden will be strong,......xxx

[LusciousMum23]

Lots of love & hugs to you Danielle :hugs::hugs:
Sending love & prayers to little Hayden .

[babylover111]

Oh my god, this is so unfair on you I can't even imagine being in your position.

I'll keep Hayden in my prayers and hope for a strong recovery. I'll also keep Grant in my prayers that he'll come around and realise what's important during this time of crisis. Most importantly I'll keep you in my prayers to help you stay strong :hugs:

[Percy]

Im so sorry you are going though this. I can understand how hard the waiting is.

All my prayers and thoughts are with you and your little man. Take care of yourself.

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[Trumpet]

Oh sweetie, you must be a wreck and so scared. I hope your little man gets better everything works out positively for you.

:hugs:

[HouseOfBlues]

My prayers and thoughts are with you both
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

[the_original_duchess]

i'm back from the hospital finally.
he is doing ok atm. still only tube feeds, and when he is awake he has alot of trouble breathing but the best thing in the world happened today, he laughed and smiled at me. it was one of those first high pitched squealy laughs but for only 2 weeks old thats pretty good. most bubbas dont do them until 4-6 weeks. the nurse saw it too, she said it was the real thing, and got all teary.
i also saw a psychologist today for myself and a social worker. i have PND unfortunantly, i see them again on thursday to see if i will need to go on meds, or if i can just go to counsilling.
and i also had a big meeting with the doctors today. they are leaning more towards it being a heart issue. so they did an xray this afternoon and will know the results of that tomorrow morning. then on wednesday they do an ultrasound of his heart, and friday they take a whole heap of bloods. then on saturday they might be sending us over to westmead hospital, depending on the other results for an MRI scan to check out everything in detail, and see some specialists.
so will have all my answers by next week.
he is strong, and we will pull through this, basically coz im a pushy mummy and i wont let it happen anyother way. he has to get through this, coz i need him to come home and be with me and his big brother and sister, so we can be happy and start our lives over in a more posotive way, without any more dramas hopefully.
and as for his father, well i hope he is happy doing whatever he chooses to do with his life. and as far as im concerned i got the better end of the deal, these 3 wonderful beautiful children, who make me more happy then words can say. he doesnt have that, besides 2 nights a month, so he's the one loosing out in the end, not me.

[DQ]

and as far as im concerned i got the better end of the deal, these 3 wonderful beautiful children, who make me more happy then words can say. he doesnt have that, besides 2 nights a month, so he's the one loosing out in the end, not me.

Its an attitude like that that will get you far in life hun. It will also show strength and courage to your children who will grow up idolising their mummy. You'll see.......everything will be the way you want it to be very very soon.

Hugs and prayers to you and your babies. :hugs:

[Lunar]

as far as im concerned i got the better end of the deal, these 3 wonderful beautiful children, who make me more happy then words can say.


:yes:

Fingers crossed for some good results.

That giggling and smiling has to be a pretty good sign!:yes:
:hugs:

[littlepickle]

Danielle :hugs: My thoughts and prayers are with you and your little bubba. I hope that there will be some good news for you by next week. You sound very strong and positive which is just what your little man needs, I am sure with you in his corner he will be ok:hugs:

[reAllytee]

Sounds like he is doing well & thats fantastic news !

You are incredibly strong & yes you have got the better end of the deal ! Tough luck to him !

:hugs: :hugs:

[Coffee]

and as for his father, well i hope he is happy doing whatever he chooses to do with his life. and as far as im concerned i got the better end of the deal, these 3 wonderful beautiful children, who make me more happy then words can say. he doesnt have that, besides 2 nights a month, so he's the one loosing out in the end, not me.

That's right, you got the better deal, you have your children, who love and care for you. You can see their milestones, see them growing up and becoming more and more an own and independet person and he gets nothing.
I can only imagine what you have to go through but I wish you all the best, for Hayden, a wonderful name btw and for yourself and your family.
You seem to be a very strong and willing person and I hope that Hayden is a little fighter as well.
It's so unfair, that he has to go through so many medical tests at such a young age.:no:

I keep my fingers crossed for a good result, wishing you all the strengths you need.
:fingerscrossed:

[Nowhere]

you poor thing and poor bub we are thinking or you guys i hope thing improve soon, i know you are in such a horible place right now and nothing apart from you babay being better will fix that, but just want to send you our love :hugs:

i just read the update after posting i missed it first time i looked, im glad he has improved a bit thats great every bit helps him get stronger, I know how much you must want to get him home, just think how much stronger he will be when he does get to go home he is obviously a fighter and that thanks to his MUMMY stay stong i know how hard it is,

[jcb]

Sending you and your babies lots of :hugs: :hugs:
Your little man are in my thoughts....

[mum2my4]

I hope the tests that they are doing will give you some answers.

What lovely news about his smile.

You are doing a wonderful job, I can't understand how a father can not care about what is currently going on with his son. Seperated or not he is still the father.

I hope Hayden gives you a lovely big smile tomorrow too:hugs:

[indigoin0z]

:hugs: oh gosh danielle... :crying:

[so glad i decided to drop in for a moment!]

i was going to say..
it seems as though the stars are showing they have quite a journey in store for you..
so many challenges one after the other...




"Empowerment": You're more powerful than you realize. It's safe for you to be powerful.

Meaning: You're no longer willing to see yourself as a victim in any way. It means letting go of all blame with respect to other people, past conditions, or present circumstances.

it appears i may be right...

keep fighting lovey... its amazing the strength you find on these torturous journeys'.. :fingerscrossed:

PeaCe & health to you & little HaYDeN! :wizard:

[SairBear]

hang in there kiddo:hugs: ...

danielle, you and bub have dealt with so much and we all know u are strong enough to deal with any obstacle that comes your way including this one... keep your chin up .. :hugs:
you are an amazing mum and your kids are so so lucky to have you.:yes:

you both are in my thoughts and prayers

[Harlequin]

I'll keep you in my thoughts and send some positive vibes your way. :hugs: :hugs:

[Scout]

Each day means that you are both getting stronger. You may have PND but you sound clear in your thoughts which is a very good thing. And that little smile is telling you that he's going to fight to be with you!

We all look forward to hearing the next update.

[Lirael]

I think its more a case of the awful things happening to you than PND. htink about it, your hubby leaves, you have to have a baby alone, he is unwell etc. not to mention all your hormones. i think its all just piling up to be honest. :hugs:

[TyBean]

Oh Danielle hun!!! Sending you lots and lots and millions of :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: as you sure deserve every single one of them!!...

You are in my thoughts and my prayers.... as is your beautiful little Hayden.... I pray everything is ok and you can take your little man home and have your three beautiful children around you there!!....

Fingers crossed for you all....

And you are right when you say he doesn't deserve your 4.... the way he is acting he doesn't... and you have the best end of the deal as you have your three beautiful children with you to love and look after.... and they are always going to remember that hun!!...

More millions of :hugs: for you!!.... I hope everything goes well for you all!!!

[andrewsmum]

Be strong Danielle, you have been through so much the past few weeks.

I'm sooo glad to read that Hayden's getting better and hopefully the doctors will find out what is wrong with him and help him get better. It's sooo sweet that he gave you a giggle and smile (that's amazing!!)

I pray that everything starts to look better for you.

Kylie