Raising Girls

[jojosdad]

Hi,

I have one daughter who's 11 months and we get along great (at this stage we're definitely on the same level). As she gets older though, one concern I have is that I might not be able to relate to her all that well. Not having had sisters and having gone to an all-boys high shcool might have something to do with this feeling.

I've heard that Steve Biddulph's Raising Boys is really good... for boys. Can anyone recommend anything similar for girls? Perhaps some wisdom from your own experience?

Thanks,
jojosdad

[reAllytee]

I havent got any books to recommend but can onyl speak from my experiences with my dad which werent great.
The best thing you can do is talk !!! & talk heheh be open & honest with her make her realise that even though you are the boss being the dad you are her soft place to fall & someone she can rely on when she needs it.
Girls need a strong presence when it comes to their fathers or otherwise they will look elsewhere for that comfort as in they will go to other boys often older etc which you dont want especially at an early age you want her to get her security from you.
She will rebel yes as all teenagers do :rolleyes: ;) but as long as you keep communication open from early on & have a strng relationship & bond so real one on one time with a specific thing you both only do together she will understand your only wanting the best for her.
Good luck :D

[tyler's mum]

i have always been daddy little girl 25years on i still am:D

what makes my dad a great dad ,,, he has always been there for me and loved me no matter how many mistakes i made,, i can't really give you much advice all i can say is just be there for your little girl and make sure she know you love her.. and she will grow up,, and know she can come to you know matter what

[Annasmum36]

I haven't heard of any books but speaking from my own rltnshp with my dad, I would say the most important thing is to love your daughter unconditionally - never make her think that she has to do something or behave in a certain way for you to love her. Then she will learn to trust you and if that's the case she will always feel that she can talk to you (she might decide not to, when she's a teenager!) and that for her you will be dependable and reliable.

And the other thing which I know my dad had big problems with, is to try not to be too over protective. I know it's a big ask with fathers, but their little girls need to be able to make their own mistakes, whether it's learning how high they can climb before they fall off the wall or learning which type of boy is going to break their heart! Your job is to help her pick herself up afterwards and go back out to face another wall and another boy.

Good luck, and have fun.

[Biene]

My dad and I are quite close and I'm able to talk to him about everything going on in my life.

I think its important to do things together, my dad was a builder so I would join him in the garage and would attempt to make my own barbie furniture, we also did father/daughter things together e.g. day trips and I always knew that no matter what happened he would always be there for me.

[Ky]

My Dad was an only child and ended up having 2 girls ... he was just himself and loved us ... I think that was all we needed (apart from the obvious food, clothes, home etc).

Keep doing what you are doing ... treat her like a precious gem and at the same time wrestle with her and teach her tough lessons ... you will do a fantastic job if she knows that you love her. Little girl's self esteem and confidence is often tied up in the knowledge that their Dad loves them.

[LilShenanigans]

I thought from my experience may be a bit diff...

I actually never liked my father, he tells me apparently I did (probably at the same age as your daughter)... we never talked, we never got along... I just wasn't like him at all...
Yeah did go to football games but that grew tiresome and I loathed the sport.

But fortunately, we've mended our ways.
We talk a lot, tell eachother everything, are quite open and honest which is fantastic.

But one thing that has always stuck in my head. When I was a teenager and really depressed, my dad would ask mum "Should I go and talk to her", which mum of course replied no... Nobody did talk to me as a teenager.
And that was incredibly hard especially since all I wanted WAS someone to talk to!!

So keep the communication open, honest... not gross honesty :p always be there no matter what!!!
If work calls but your daughter's call is louder, obviously answer your daughters!!

[the_queen]

A friend of mine has a book about raising girls (in fact, I think it is called "Raising Girls" LOL) I don't think it's written by that Steve Biddulph guy, but I think he does the introduction or something like that.

[moonblossom]

Oh my girls...such wonderful people to raise. Mine are so easy.

Now the boys...TERRORS...no i'm kidding they are great but its so true that women are from venus and men are from mars LOL

Yeah I admit sometimes I listen to my boys...watch what they do and i'm like WHAT THE lol

The only advice I can give, is be open about EVERYTHING. My children never worry about what they need to talk to me about...I dont judge them just try to guide them the best I can, and its ok for them to have a different opinion to me

Hope this helps a bit