everything going down hill :(

[Tamz]

Hi guyz

my little one had sleeping problems at the start, i went to the sleep clinic and after that he was sleeping 1.5-2hrs sometimes i wouldnt have to resettle him. Now the past week (hes 4.5months) when he shows tired signs i walk him into his bedroom and he starts crying and getting soo upset. he has only been sleeping 20 -45mins ... ... its getting me down because im returning to work in less than 2weeks :( i need him to have a little routine.

i went to the docs today, i thought he might be teething because the crying when hes in his room (when hessuppose to be sleeping) is a high pitch sssscceeaamm!!!!!!!! he starts coughing and getting histerical.
she said there is nothing wrong with him and its him .. she said to let him cry. and to have him stop sleepiung in my bed and when he wakes up to let him cry even if its for like 1-2hrs!!!:mad: this cant be right?!

i had another person tell me that co-sleeping stuffs up babies naps during the day?

Im paraniod about his sleeping because before i had breast refusal because of him being over tired.

Im starting to stress about going back to work and maybe hes picking up on it and its making him unsettled?

Thanks

Tamz

[Sarie]

Hi Tamz,
I'm sorry you're having problems. I did controlled crying for my boys and while it worked for us, to me, I don't think you'd be interested.
I'm sure someone with the 'no cry' sleep ideas will be along soon.
Thinking of you
Sarie

[cosmic]

he starts coughing and getting histerical.
she said there is nothing wrong with him and its him .. she said to let him cry. and to have him stop sleepiung in my bed and when he wakes up to let him cry even if its for like 1-2hrs!!!:mad: this cant be right?!

Tamz, I would agree that NO this can't be right! This does not sound like medical advice to me, but a doctor imposing her views on parenting - which I think is SO wrong, given that people see doctors as authority figures.

As for co-sleeping, many parents will tell you it absolutely does not disturb their sleep during the day. Given that 80% of the world's population sleep with their babies, it is obviously a natural, healthy thing to do.

I hope that some other mums can give you advice on how to settle your bub, but I certainly wouldn't be listening to that doctor.

[Mummabear]

Hi Tamz,

Big hugs to you. I'm on the tail end of getting DS sleeping sorted. I understand how hard it can be.

We ended up using the cry it out method as nothing else would work. You seem to want to avoid that (if I'm reading your post right), so I won't post about it, other than to say that it worked for us and if you decided you would like that info please PM me and I'd be happy to share with you what worked for us.

We tried so many gentler methods and nothing worked. It was a hard decision to make but it was the right one for us.

I guess co-sleeping has it's pros and cons, but I struggle to see how it can work when Mum goes back to work. Hopefully some co-sleeping working Mummas will post for you and be able to help you there.

I hope you find something that works for you. Do what feels right for you and bubs. I know that it's hard to find that sometimes, especially with so many people telling you what you should do, but remember that you know your baby best, and whatever path you choose will be the right one if you do it with love.

I hope you find your peace soon.

Larissa

[Goosie22]

Hi Tamz, i'm a co-sleeping, extended Breastfeeding, baby spoiling Hippi;)

Here are somelinks to help you understand what is happening with your baby, while your there have a look at the other info you will find lots of things to help. There is a forum also with posts from other successfull Breastfeeding Mums to point you in the right direction and give support.

http://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfinfo/wakeful.html


This link is about CC

http://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfinfo/control.html

[Heids]

Sorry to hear the news, is very distressing when you bub doesn't sleep and gets overtired and grumpy...... as I know the feeling all to well !

What method did they teach you the first time around at the Sleep Clinic ? As I would be inclined to start from the beginning all over again. They say bubs try to test the waters with routines now and then as I have read off www.sleepsence.net

We lastly resorted to the Crying Down Method where he crys/protests ( 6 mins ) then you pat, for both day and night sleeps. Brandon is doing well now but I am expecting him to test us every 2 months or so to see if the same rules apply as before.

I do send my Best Wishes that all falls into place before you head back to work.

Hugs Heids

[Tamz]

thanks for the replys girls i appreciate it.

i did try and do the sleep clinics meathod all over again but im rocking the cot and hes still screaming his head off, so i usually pick him and confort him. sometimes i will go outside and say hello to the dogs and come back in.

at the sleep clinic they said for me to let him cry for 5/10mins then go in, settle him and leave when hes settled and repeat. is that CC???? they said its not.

for a 4.5month old how long is too long to leave them to cry? 15mins?

i think he has me wrapped around his little pinkie :rolleyes:

tamz

[Goosie22]

personally:) I think its too long to cry alone.

He dosn't like feeding to sleep? Then you could try this:- I am asuming that you have checked the nappy and that he is feed appropriatly. picked him up after you wraped him a little with his arms tucked in holding him across your body firmly, pat him bum and rock. It might take a while but he will see you are there for him and settle down and go to sleep. You can try a sling or a rocking chair.

I was under the impression that CC is not recommended for babies under 6 mnths.

[Heids]

I was under the impression that CC is not recommended for babies under 6 mnths.[/QUOTE]

I think people get CC mixed up with CD ( Crying Down ). Crying Down is where your let the bub cry/protest for around 6 mins ( changes depending on age ), then you pat/comfort your bub to sleep. This method it used at almost every sleep clinic and from the age of around 4 to 6 weeks onwards.

For more information on this I found Tizzie Hall's website very useful ww.saveoursleep.com.au She has a new book coming out and also has a column in the Practical Patenting Magagine every month.

Heids

[cosmic]

Heids, can I ask after you have gone in to pat/comfort them (after the 6 minutes is up) and if they are still crying, what happens then? As in, do you leave them for another 6 minutes? Isn't that the same as CC? :confused: Sorry - just asking because I haven't heard of crying down.

[Heids]

Heids, can I ask after you have gone in to pat/comfort them (after the 6 minutes is up) and if they are still crying, what happens then? As in, do you leave them for another 6 minutes? Isn't that the same as CC? :confused: Sorry - just asking because I haven't heard of crying down.

Sorry, I didn't explain properly.... You let them cry/protest for 6 mins then you go in pat them till they fall asleep (it can take up to 22 mins of patting but by then they usually have fallen asleep)
With a bub from 4 months onwards, it says leave for 12 mins then go in and pat ( it can take up to 46mins but by then they should have fallen asleep )
You continue this method every sleep and the process get easier and easier and by the 4,5,6 or 7th day... bub will be soundly sleeping otherwise you do not continue as there may be a medical problem.

Hope this Helps Heids

[Horseymum]

Hi Heids and everyone else

I do the Crying down thing but I didn't know that it had a "name"!
I have found it to be gentler than controlled crying and helpful when I can't settle him any other way.

I don't let him cry for a specific period of time but play it by ear and judge on the type of cry he is giving... I never leave him for longer than 3 or 4 minutes because that is the longest I can bear. If this doesn't work after a few goes we just go to something else.....

If absolutely all else fails I put him in the car and go for a drive, guaranteed to have him asleep in the blink of an eye - saved my sanity on a number of occasions : )

Karen

[BecH]

Can I suggest you read this article it helped me with my bad sleeper.

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070200.asp

Please don't feel pressured to co-sleep or not just do what feels the most right to you. Although crying down you do go in and settle them you might still find 12 minutes a long time to hear them cry, i know I would. If you co-sleep you can often gain a few hours at night which make alll the difference in the world. Also I just learnt to go to bed a bit earlier to catch up my sleep rather than trying to get my bubba to sleep, because I tried it and it did not work for me.

It doesn't matter what any professional says you need to be comfortable with what you are doing.

Good luck and lots of hugs

[Tea Lady]

Is bub going to a daycare centre? You could contact them and find out what they do to get bubs to sleep so you can try something similar. Just an idea - you may have done this already! Hope things pick up for you!