Playgroup delima

[Elyse29]

hi all just have a question.
I go to a playgroup with my Daughter she is almost three and we have been having some problem lately.
She doesnt seem to get along with this one young boy, they fight over toys and thing. But she tends to take her frustration out by hitting. my Daughter doesnt react like this to another of the other children and i do seem to think that it may be a bit provoked on his behalf as well (not that that excuses hitting). I know this is wrong and i do tell her off and make her say sorry and put her in time out.
The thing is the mother of this boy tends to make me feel really quilty about her behaviuor and that i am a terrible mum. She hasnt said anything directly to me but i just get the vibe from her.
How do i approach this, i dont think that i am a bad mum and i just think my daughter is a normal three yr old that just gets frustrated.
Do you think this is normal for her behaviour or should i just stop going to playgroup all together?

[Honeydoll]

Hi,

I don't think you should stop taking her to playgroup. I don't think just because she behaves like so says that you're a bad mum or whatever the other mother must be thinking. After all, we do try to teach our kids values--some may still try to push their way, or ignores our teachings or will just take some time.

Remember, she'll only 3. I guess, just a bit more patience in letting her understand that hitting is a no-no. I think, at this stage, they don't have much options on how to deal with frustrations like adults. Another thing, as you said, there may be some provocation from the other child. You might want to watch them play and you can see who's in the wrong.

Like for example, if you see that your child had the toy first and this boy just comes and takes it, you can go. "Don't hit. Tell him that you had the toy first." Something like that. Then if the other moms, particularly his, hears this. Then at least she's aware that it's her boy who provokes it.

Furthermore, don't fret. Seem like your child has a temper and may just need some guidance on how to deal with it and her frustrations. Don't think of it as a bad thing though because, as this lady from Ngala said about my DD, it's good that she has a temper--that way, it'll be unlikely that she'll allow herself to be bullied.

Keep taking her to playgroup since it also helps in social development and she'll learn what is socially acceptable at a young age.

Although, it is hard dealing with other's kids. Sometimes, you know that they're in the wrong but you can't scold them or tell them off because you don't want to have a "head-to-head collision" with the mom! I remember that these 2 toddlers were riding on little bikes and my DD was on her tummy and they just biked in full speed towards her! Luckily they stopped and was just a few inches away from her. My gawd! I think if they did hit her, I might have ended up thwapping them off the bikes!

Anyway, good luck!