Need some advice

[Michaela]

This thread has been closed

[Kadwil]

It sounds like you have been having a roller-coaster ride for quite a while! I'm sorry things are a bit rough at the moment. I can understand why you are angry - it would seem that way to me if I were in your shoes!

I went through something similar with my husband, only I ended up leaving him for 2 years because he didn't give up the drink. Well now he only drinks cordial or juice at the pub :eek: , we talk about everything and we are as happy as ever. I am glad you are going to see a counsellor to sort it out - we didn't, I just left! My husband did a similar thing to me when we first got back together - after all the times I put up with his inability to deal properly with things and just drowning his sorrows, he then started to tell me how troubled I was - I couldn't stand it! I'm not sure if it is the same thing, but I talk a lot about what bothers me, it helps me to deal with it. Is that how you are coping with Oliver? I know whenever I spoke about 'bad' feelings my DH couldn't cope and would worry about me because I couldn't 'get over' something. He just didn't understand that talking about it helped me to get over it. Maybe that is where your DH is coming from? I'm not sure if any of this helps. Hopefully when things calm down and you aren't so angry you can work out what happened, and maybe suggest how he can better support you instead of using the counsellor to do it? Communication - proper communication - is one of the hardest things in the world to master IMO. Congrats on the counselling, I hope things look up soon.

[xpectant]

I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through all of this. Is it possible that your DH was just concerned about your grief and was trying to "fix" it like all males do? It sounds like such a difficult time for you both and it is so encouraging that you are going to counselling together & it seems he's been taking on board what they've recommended (ie. less caffeine). All the best, darl.