I don't want to get married!!!

[Taddy]

I have been thinking for the last few days. And well I just don't feel that excited about getting married anymore. We had planned to get married on 20th October this year. I have my dress on layby. I really truly love DF. He has nothing to do with it anyway.
The other night i was talking to my sil well she only rang up to tell me that her and her dp have know decided to get married in july this year (2mths away) instead of in 2009. Her and her DF have been together for 3yrs in july.
I don't know why this is. DF and I have been together for 7yrs in august. I really do want to marry him but its the fact that sil will be getting married before us and they all seem to compare. My dress was only $350 and the dress she wants is $1700.
I have not informed DF yet as hes away seeing if he gets this job or not.
I am just not sure what to do or say.

Am I just being jealous?

[GraceUnhearing]

it does sounds a bit strange that they cheanged it.

id doesnt matter how much you spend on your Dress Taddy as long as you like it money doesnt make a difference!

[tanni_83]

i think that ur sil wants the spotlight on them, thats why they changed the date...

dont worry hun, money isnt everything. do what u feel is right for you :hugs:

[Melo]

Ohhh Taddy, in all seriousness its not about what you have or dont have :no:.

The most important thing about a wedding is that you and your DF are really showing how much you love each other and how much you both are really committed to each other!

[2boysmama]

All brides are beautiful on their wedding day. By the time yours comes around everyone will have forgotten about your sil's. Enjoy the moment.

[Taddy]

Thanks to everyone for replying.

DF and I really do love eachother so much. We have been meaning to get married for a year and half know and have only just set a date. But as soon as we tell everyone we have a date sil decides they will bring theres forward. It just seems to really P*SS me off. I am having enough problems with my stuffed up family.

[JATS]

Don't let her actions change your plans. My guess is thats what she wants.

I'd be tempted to stuff her right up and elope, come back with photos from your tropical resort wedding on the beach type event. :devil6: Can't compete if she dosen't know what you're doing!

[katherine]

dont feel jealous..... i had similar situations.. i had one friend who was dating for a year and got married 6 months after that. another one the same, and married two months later.... mean while i was dating for 3 years with a baby..... and i was still not married....

but dont worry about the dress thing, you are both in different situations.. and what a waste of money is all i can think!!!!!

its up to you if you feel marriage does make a greater love and stronger commitment, or if it is a peice of paper to you... and DF....

and as for the date thing.... after i got over my jealousy.. i realised... i can watch and see how there days go, get ideas, things to change and tips......

[Taddy]

I had really thought about eloping.

[Missy75]

Them going before you gives you the chance to upstage them. Don't make any more plans until after their wedding. ;)

I personally don't think it's about the cost or the size, but the originality. We had a low budget wedding and everyone there commented on how fun, relaxed, and totally personal it was. A true expression of 'us'. A couple of brides-to-be complained that they wanted their weddings to be like ours but had to have the big expensive fluffy wedding because of their families.

[Tulp]

Hey 20th Oct. My birthday - fantastic day to get married.

Taddy don't worry about others. We had DH's younger brother getting married (again) a few months before our big day. They picked an earlier date after we announced our date. We were just happy for them - happy they chose to tie the knot after a while.

You wedding is your big day and what anyone does should not come in the way. Don't allow what others do to spoil this excitement for you and your husband to be. Focus on the positive and all will turn out sensational.:yes:

[~mia&ryan~]

Don't let her actions change your plans. My guess is thats what she wants.
My thoughts exactly!! Dont give her the satisfaction of you changing your plans. Go ahead with what you originally wanted and just enjoy it. It will be special and beautiful because it will be yours..

[JnA]

A true expression of 'us'.



:yelclap: and this is what a wedding should be about.

Guests are nice, but they are not pivotal to the event.

Personally, in this situation, I would not say anything. If your SIL wants to make it a rivalry thing, don't give her the satisfaction. Then it's *her* problem, not yours.

Congratulations BTW :)

[katherine]

I had really thought about eloping.
well why not do that! if its not all about the fussing and stuff...... then it is still about your commitment and love..... who needs an expensive, money wasting day :)

i always said i would care if elvis married us.. as long as we were.....

[Taddy]

Thanks for all of your replies.
I was speeking to my dad last night just to have a bit of a whinge really. He told me not to change the date to satisfy everyone else. Its our day and don't let anyone spoil it.
I love my dad. Hes always got something to say.

[~J'dore~]

This sounds so familar! My sil did exactly the same thing. As soon as we got engaged and told people the date she said they were changing their date to 3 months before ours (was meant to be 2 years later!)

She even said to my mil that there was no way that she was going to let us get married before her. It upset me at the time but I know that she was just jealous of our relationship ( they always had problems and are no longer together sadly)

Anyway our wedding day was perfect, yours will be too. Just have everything the way that you want it. Don't worry about what sil is doing.

I'm sure it'll be a great wedding:thumbsup:

[mummy-with-cheeky-boys]

First of

Dont be worried if you dont want to be married DF and i planned on getting married in jan just gone i called it of we had everythink already done for it and booked and i just didnt know. For me i thought it was more a fact that everyone was saying you got to kids and it was time you got married. made me feel as thought i was getting married because people wanted me to not because i wanted to.

In my heart i felt that when the time was right we wil set the date but until then their is no point why get married we have 2 wonderful kids together and a house we are buying. If we wait 2 years or so we can have the wedding we want how we want.

As for your SIL yes it dose sound funny why would you just come in and say you brand the wedding forward.

As for your wedding dress it dont matter if you spend $10 to $2000+ on it all that matters is if you like it and if you look good in it. I spent $180 on mine you would not know that it was from ebay you would think it came from a shop. Yet it was not good for my BM she told me it was cheep and looked it to and she would never have a dress like that. Dont worrie it will look nice thats why you got it.

SO dont worrie about your SIL if it was me i would go to the wedding see what she has and then try and out do her lol well thats me not everything is like that but yes i am that kind of person lol