View Full Version : Helping Baby To Sleep
Just a quick question to find out, does anyone have any ideas on how to help your baby to sleep in their own room in their own cot?
I have heard sometimes it helps to elevate one end of the cot with phone books or even to put an item of your clothing with your scent on it with them in their bed to help them sleep as some babies suffer from separation anxiety.
Are they good ideas to try?
Also I have heard that it is normal and natural for babies to want to be with their parents and to sleep with their parents as that is how they feel secure. After all the baby did spend 9 months of the pregnancy growing inside of thier mother.
You will find that there are differences of opinion on where a baby should sleep. Before I go on- I think that ultimately each parent has to decide for themselves what is right for their child, and your own instincts are the best guide as to what you should do.
I am firmly of the belief that babies should sleep in the same room with their parents, particularly in those early months when they are so dependant on their mothers. My boy, Felix is 18 months and has never slept in a cot. For us it has simply been the most convienient situation- he can breastfeed whenever he wants to without fully waking up, and without waking me in most cases.
As far as safety is concerned, and SIDS, you need to know that it is only safe to co-sleep if you and your partner are not drunk or under the influence of drugs, and that when babies are very small they should be kept well away from pillows.
In the end, as I said, it's a personal choice. For me, emotionally it would be too hard to have Felix in another room. I also think I get a better nights sleep with him in the bed. When he was small it was very important to me to know that he was safe, and I couldn't think of a safer place than right next to me.
Sorry, this has turned into a bit of an essay! :o
I'm sure you'll get some different points of view... hopefully you'll be able to figure out what's right for you.
I am interested in co-sleeping, though it doesn't suit us. My husband is a heavy sleeper and doesn't care for my personal space while he is sleeping let alone Jakob as well. Jakob slept in our room for the first three months and quite often slept with me though I was always quite frightened of him falling out or Chris' movements. I am also the opposite of Chris and am quite a light sleeper who sleeps with ear plugs,(Chris used to snore). Though I am still very aware of Jakob's movements in the next room.
My questions are:
How do you manage bedtimes?(do you all go at the same time?)
Do you have ways to stop Felix from falling out?
I ask this because Jakob is crawling everywhere at such speed that I worry that he would get to the edge and fall off. Our cat tends to sleep on our bed and Jakob is fascinated with him. Hence more hurdles we would face.
Sorry if I have rambled on and if my questions sound dumb. Just curious. :)
Hey Jakobs mum
no worries, I'm always happy to ramble on about parenting!
my partner is also a heavy sleeper, and it took me a while to trust him not to roll on Felix- so I kept my body between him and Felix for the first few months. But Jeff has become really aware of Felix, now he just has his own little space on the bed and doesn't move all night! He was a little offended at my concern- as he says he's never fallen off the bed at night so why would he roll on the baby?
To answer your questions:
Felix goes to bed first, thank goodness, couldn't handle not having that little adult time! I put him down in our bed, usulaly either rocked or fed to sleep. Depending on how long it is before we go to bed, he might stir once and want another feed- I just go lie down next to him and feed him back off to sleep- he doesn't usually 'wake' (his eyes stay closed). Then we just jump in when we're readuy to sleep!
Our bed is really low- we changed this once Felix got mobile so we didn't have to worry about him falling out. He never does get out though, I guess if he really woke up he might but usually he yells out for me rather than getting up.
Other people use detachable side rails to stop their babies falling out, or another popular option is to push a drop side cot up against your bed and have your baby lying in there- you can breastfeed them if you want but you also have your own space. This is sometimes called a 'sidecar' arrangement.
Yeah our cat likes to jump on the bed too- I just make sure she doesn't actually sit on him!!
If you want more info I'd recommend visiting www.naturalparentingforums.com there are lots of mums talking about co-sleeping there!
My son is twenty months old and has been sleeping with us on and off since he was born, as a newborn I found it a lot easier to breastfeed when he was in our bed and being alight sleeper I never had to worry about rolling, I was awake if he so much as squirmed, as he got older it became difficult so i trained him back into his bed, it took ages and was heartbreaking but eventually he setteled , kind of. I I found that he had gone from a once only feed to 4 - 5 feeds a day and I knew they were just for comfort because he wasn't with me. At 11 months he decided to ween himself, I went from batteling to get him to drink from any bottle, to having him refuse the breast and only take a bottle, once that started his feeds settled back down to 2-3 a night, I just filled the bottled and gave it to him in bed.
Anyway by 15 months he was still unsettled and waking up 2-3 times and i was just getting so tired jumping up and down. One night when he was sick I put him back in bed with me and realised that he slept much more soundly and comfortably and I got a really good nights sleep also knowing that he was next to me and safe. He is now still in our bed. He goes to his cot at about 7.30 and then usually wakes up for abottle at abou 2.00 then he sleeps with us until 7.00 .
It works really well for us and my husband doesn't mind at all, cam just sleeps between us and cuddles up to whoever is closest. Anyway I am aware that it doesn't work for everyone, but am a little tired of all the concern surrounding co-sleeping. I think it is the most natural thing in the world and although there are exceptions, where else should a baby be that next to his mum and dad while he sleeps.
Thanks for all the info ladies. :)
I enjoyed Jakob sleeping in bed with me after Chris went to work in the mornings when he was brand new. It's not for us now but I do bring him in with us whilst he is sick. I am looking forward to when he can get in and out of our bed safely by himself and come in for nice big cuddles with mummy and daddy. :p
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