scared of second pregnancy!!

[SlowlyGoingInsane]

My first child has special needs. I am pregnant with #2 now. Im worried that something will go wrong with this child. I dont know if i could bear going through all the heart ache again! The doctors have told us it is very unlikely of it happening again and we have had tests and know its not genetic but there is still something in the back of my mind.
Has anyone else felt like this? Im worried buti dont want to stress about it. Anyone beeen in the same curcimstances and had a perfectly healthy child after a special needs child?
Sorry i may be sounding selfish here,if i were to have another special needs child i would love it just as much, just needing a whinge and some support!

[V8]

It doesn't always happen, i have 2 cousins that have special needs but their brother and sister are perfectly fine. They had 2 kids out of 4 with special needs.

[Nowhere]

Big hugs to you i know it wont help but sometimes its nice

I have no advice or wonderfull things to say to make you feel better, all i can say is i truely pray that you will have a perfectly healthy baby this time around you by far derserve to, i know things dont alway turn out how we plan or how they should but what ever happens i know you will be a fantastic mum to this next one a yu already are to the one you have and im sure you wil have enough love to go around

If you dont mind ma asking what special needs does your child have, my dd also has special needs not to the extent of what alot do but has her batles

[SlowlyGoingInsane]

DD has cerebral palsy

[FourAngelKisses]

Not really the same thing, but DS1 was born with a kidney disorder and had surgery when he was 3wks and 7wks old. By the time he was 8wks old he had been in hospital for 4wks and away from us for 2wks (he was in Sydney, we were 4hrs away). We didn't know until he was 5 if the surgeries had worked.

His sister was born 15mths later and had an incomplete unilateral cleft lip. She suffered fron constant ear infections and tonsilitis, urinary tract infections, she was deaf until she was 2 because of glue ear, she ALWAYS had colds. Between birth and 2yrs of age, the longest she was well for was 2wks. She has had 4 surgeries with more to come, plus a load of dental work/surgeries.

Because of what we went through with them both, we decided no more kids, it was too much heartache for us and not fair on them to go through the trauma.

Fate had other plans for us and I did end up with 2 more, who were born 100% healthy.

It is a big decision when you have a special needs child. I wish you the best of luck deciding.

[MamaRabbit]

Yes my 2nd pregnancy was an anxious time. We wanted to fall pregnant quickly....but this was quicker than planned, there is only a 14 month age gap - we hadn't even received the results back from my DS genetic testing. We finally got it back when I was 7 or 8 months pregnant. It turned out to be negative but I still had alot of worry. I must admit I did find a place of peace at some point though, a case of whatever will be will be, and I was okay with that.

DD has turned out to be perfectly healthy and at times I am experiencing motherhood for the first time. I never really had to child proof my house due to Charlie's development delay, Sophie has worked things out so quick that she can turn the house upside down before I blink an eye. She has rapidly overtaken his development level, which makes it hard work on me, but I know she will be a great friend and play a helping hand in teaching him new things in the future.

I receive so much love and learn so many lessons from the pair of them. I wouldn't wish any child a struggle, but I know that I give Charlie the best he can possibly get so I wouldn't change him for the world. I have no doubt that you are a strong woman and have learned alot from your DD. If your new little bundle has any additional needs you will find the strength to get on with life and deal with it. You will have hard times but make your home the happiest place on Earth, surround yourself with the right people with the right services and all will be good :)

I wish you are really happy and healthy pregnancy and look forward to hearing from you again.

[gremily]

I often think about if we have another child what would I do if bub was another special needs child. It's scary to think about sometimes.
But then, before dd2 was born it wasn't something I'd ever thought about, or I guess thought I would want or could cope with.
There is nothing I would not do for dd2 though, and if we did have another child with Special Needs then I would get on with what I need to do.

http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?t=37458&page=7
I asked the same question a while back. Scroll down to the 5th post (mine) and a few ppl have given their thoughts afterwards.:)

[jessgray]

when i was pregnant with #2 i was worried they would have the same problems as ds1. ds2 has proven me wrong:thumbsup: ds1 has hearing problems and has since birth but at his last hearing test a few months ago one ear was within normal range the other ear had a wax blockage so they couldnt get a great idea of where that ear was,he has food allergies,asthma,eczema,an expressive speech delay.
ds2 has reflux:laughing: