View Full Version : ARGHH!! wont let me put her down!
My gorgeous DD is just over 3 weeks old, is a great sleeper.. but its GETTING her to sleep is the problem i have.
she has started to stop the day time naps and replaced it for just 1 big sleep after lunch.
She feeds, falls asleep but when i put her to bed she wakes straight back up, and i have to start all over again.
Or getting patted/soothed/cuddled to sleep.. same prob.. soon as shes dead asleep, we try and put her down and she wakes straight back up!
It can take hours to get her to bed at night, and many many tries!
She falls to sleep easily enough but wont be put down.
I also am having a problem putting her down throughout the normal day time activities.......
She screams through every nappy change, every bath time, going in the car seat, going in her pram, in her rocker/swing.. etc etc...!!!
Although when u pick her up and give her a cuddle to calm her down she stops!
Help! Im getting nothing done!
HELP HELP HELP
She's a perfectly normal baby. They all need to be held fairly constantly at this age and what's more important than that right now? She's only 3 weeks old and this usually passes within the first few months provided you attend to her need and pick her up whenever she needs it. To give you more freedom put her in a sling so she can stay close and reassured, still sleep and still give you free hands to do stuff. A soft carrier is best for developing spines. But since she's only 3 weeks old you should lie down and sleep with her anyway and catch up yourself. I've never been really sleep deprived because I a.have always had my baby in my bed so there's no settling problems and I never get up to him and b.I've always had nanna naps. Let the house go. It's only housework and it will be there tomorrow but your baby won't and this is the time when you start providing her with the security that allows her to one day blossom into an independent person. But that's years and years down the track, you just need to provide arms, boobs and love right now. Babies need to be close, human mammals are THE most helpless of all beasts :) We have such a very short time when they are so dependant on us so just let her be a baby and go with the flow. There's plenty of time for the rest of life to continue in a year or so.
W & T's sleepy mummy
30-12-2005, 19:29
Hi Dannii, Congratulations on your georgous little girl! My 9 month old Tyler was like that. In the end I co-slept with him and he slept a little better. For a long time tho it was hard to get things done! He's gradually gotten used to the idea that he can't be held all the time, but when I really have to get things done (ie little things such as showering!) I put him in his rocker or in his pram with a couple of toys so he is in the same room as me. Then he is happy:D She just obviously loves you very much:)
oh dear :) nothing that a baby does is cute when you are tired and frustrated!!!! -so firstly big hugs to you!!!!
My man is 6 weeks old - and the easiest way to settle him when he is agro - is I lie down on my side, and position him so that he is facing me (on his side). I tuck him in fairly tight to my skin (which has the added bonus that my boobs help him keep the dummy in!!:D) - and I cuddle him... pat his bum etc . THAT way when he falls asleep I extract myself - and he barely moves at all ... I found that it was the falling sensation that woke him (as I put him down) - this way he starts on the floor and stays there :)
I dont know if it is the position - the smell of me - or the smell of my milk that works ... but some days it is the ONLY way to settle him...
we have a lambs-wool on the lounge floor so that is where we lie - and where he sleeps during the day.
hope it helps!!
good luck
xxx
whatwasithinking
30-12-2005, 22:55
I totally agree with JanetF.
It will all fall into place in the next few weeks (I know it is the last thing you probably want to hear right now though).
Believe me it will get better I promise!
Kaileysmum
30-12-2005, 23:10
Hi
I agree with Janet too, my dd was like that at that age, I know its so hard as you cant get anything done. Co-sleeping is wonderful at that age as they feel safe with you there and will go to sleep, but if they are in their bed alone its a bit scary for them. Babys need to feel safe and secure, thats why they want to be held all the time. But it does get better I promise. My dd gos to sleep by herself in her cot, with no soothing at all, i just put her in there and she gos off to sleep, but I just make sure she's really tired first. I hope it all works out for you in the end, the first few weeks are the hardest but it will get better ever day.
Hope this helps.....E:o
i guess she will settle in, and in the meantime i get lots of cuddles. its just kinda hard as i can't even leave the house coz she hates the car and hates it in her pram etc.. so where ever i take her she screams the whole time till we go home and i can soothe/calm her down.
she's lucky shes so cute.. so she can get away with it ;)
Sleeps not all its cracked up to be anyways!! :D
This is about babywearing so you'll know just what a wonderful thing you're doing for your baby! :D
http://askdrsears.com/html/5/T051100.asp
Another brilliant article on why we should babywear.
http://www.naturalchild.com/guest/pam_leo.html
When we wear/carry a baby, we are providing more than the comfort of the sound of our heartbeat and voice and the touch and warmth of our body. According to research by James Prescott, a developmental neuropsychologist and cross cultural psychologist, "vestibular-cerebellar stimulation (which happens when we carry our babies) is the most important sensory system for the development of "basic trust" in the affectional bonding between mother and infant. It establishes the biological and psychological foundations for all other human relationships." We have learned that carrying infants is a vital part of nature's biological plan for mother-infant bonding, and that it is critical to the development of trust, empathy, compassion and conscience. Carrying or wearing an infant in a sling, keeping the infant in constant human contact, and breast feeding on demand are the biological design for optimal physical, intellectual and emotional human development. Research confirms that carrying human infants develops their intelligence and their capacity for trust, affection, intimacy, and love and happiness. Anthropologist Ashley Montagu refers to this carrying stage, or "in arms" period, as the "external gestation period" the infant needs to complete his/her development. There is even a brand of sling called "Womb with A View."
Read the rest at the link :)
And this is about babies and sleep. You can expect her patterns to change significantly over time so don't be surprised when they do!
http://askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp
This is one of my favourite article about responding to children's needs.
http://www.mothering.com/articles/body_soul/inspiration/giving_children_more.html
i shall go have a read of that now.. thanks Janet :p
Following on from the advice of the others - have you tried a sling? That way she is with you but you can still do things!
One that is worth looking at is the ergo baby carrier - it is a pouch when they are older but when they are this small they lie in it like a sling, all cuddled into you - but you are hands free so can do things. The reason I rave about this pouch is that it takes you from new born to 5 years old! Check out the website www.carryingaway.com.au for that and more slings.
I agree with Janet too.:)
We are getting a sling soon for our second bub.
They need an actual store like the link you just posted Theresa to go to and try them on etc. I'm so confused as to what to buy!!:confused:
HL - that site is based in Brisbane - Mitchelton - and you can go and try them all on. Amanda is very helpful - that is why I rave about the slings she sold me - they were the ones that suited me and my baby!! Her phone number is on the bubhub directory list under baby carriers.
Oh thanks for that.
Will definately do it! It is so confusing to know what to get!
Thanks!
E:)
think i'll definately have to invest in a sling.
thanks for the link draught, that was going to be my next question.. sling recomendations !!
i never used one with my other kids but think i need one this time :D
HL - that site is based in Brisbane - Mitchelton - and you can go and try them all on.
Thank God for that! I have been getting completely confused too. Happy Rady, when I come to visit, how about we go and buy slings together?!
sopolicha
31-12-2005, 10:40
HL - that site is based in Brisbane - Mitchelton - and you can go and try them all on. Amanda is very helpful - that is why I rave about the slings she sold me - they were the ones that suited me and my baby!! Her phone number is on the bubhub directory list under baby carriers.
She has moved to Boondall. I bought an Ergo from her last week and it is excellent.
Definately Cosmic, sling shopping it is!;)
moonblossom
31-12-2005, 11:28
Totally agree with Janet. But I found the quieter the house, the less sleep they would have. Whenever i cranked up the music, or there was lots of activity in the house the babe wall fall straight off to sleep, and sleep LONG.
Just an observation, my household has never been quiet LOL
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