Sisters!

[Miss Tazar]

Hi,
Need to vent, having a hard month..
So far this month Ihave been trying to cope with a baby with colic, my Dad has had an op, my husband's grandmother died and my 2nd sister had an op which turned bad and she has been in intensive care for days (Christmas Day they operated for the 5th time since 2 Dec)
We live in a small house with only one spare room for visitors, and whilst allthis has been going on we have had up to 4 adults and 3 children extra to feed, etc..
Today, I was trying to settle a screaming baby, I am tired as I don't get much sleep yet, my visitors helped themselves to my fridge and cupboard and made themselves lunch (no offer to make me any) then left the mess and went to have an afternoon nap!
Well, this finally got my goat, after 4 weeks of this drama I had had enough so I told my other sister how rude she was being and how unfair they were being.
Would have been nice if all I had to do was eat and sleep! Evidently this upset my sister and she has packed and left.
My problem is now I feel guilty and bad, what should I do?
I don't want to make relationships in the family harder as it is so difficult at the moment with my sister still so ill.
Aargh how frustrating.....

[Oscar's mum]

That is a tricky situation. Can you call your sister and explain to her that it isn't easy to have all these people in the house and cope with a little one, and that it is really putting alot of stress onto you with everything that is happening, and hopefully she will understand.

[melfunction]

You poor thing Roxi..you certainly have a lot to deal with at the moment.

You have absolutely no need to feel guilty. It sounds to me as though your family are taking advantage of you. You needed to say something and you did - go on you.

I wouldn't say anymore. Things are a bit tense for you and your family right now. Maybe when your sister has had time to think, she may realise how selfish she was.

I'm no expert on sisters - I have enough trouble with my own!!!

[reAllytee]

Dont worry give her some time & let yourselves calm down this has been a very trying time for the both of you by the sounds of it !
As Oscar's mum said i would then give her a call & calmly explain to her what you have been feeling etc dont attack by saying you do this or you do that just say that your feeling overwhelmed etc. Im sure she will understand & im sure when it comes down to it she will realise how she has been selfish just as much as you possibly overreacting ( not saying you have just that with all the stress sometimes its very easy to lose it over something small at the time when in reality it the larger problem thats causing the grief ).
I know what its like having a colicky baby my bubs was absolutely horrible i would cry every day & every nite. When my partner came home i would even say that he hates me i hate him take him away as i just couldnt cope with a baby that cried all day & nite of course i would never have given him up but i was just at my wits end. What didnt help was my sister came to visit when bubs was a month old to "help" out which meant she would give him cuddles etc through the day & maybe one of his bottle here was me having to entertain her & my nephew as well as look after bubs with little to no sleep with her not "helping" whatesoever !
Sometimes i think we also see family as walkovers if thats the right way to put it but we often just assume we can do whatever & its ok without thinking it may upset them etc i think we are all guilty of this at some time.
Just try & relax i know its easier said than done but with all this stress you need to relax as this will help bubs maybe both of you take a nice relaxing bath together as this may soothe both of you a little & help you both get some needed rest that you both deserve.
Im hoping all of it will smooth over soon for you good luck !