View Full Version : I think I'm being dumped!
I so know what being dumped by friends feels like!
And its not a good feeling, but I can't help you cos my friends ditched me when Codie was born (and when I needed them most):mad: , and now we don't talk any more.
The only way to get thru it is to think that THEY are the ones missing out!
But I think you should talk to her....what are mates for?:)
HI HUN, SO SRY THAT THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU. i KNOW IT MUST BE HARD, BUT MAYBE SHE IS JUST PREOCCUPIED WIT THIS NEW PHASE OF HER LIFE. IM SURE IT ISNT INTENTIONAL. WOW , SHE IS LUCKY TO HAVE A FRIEND THAT CARES SO MUCH ( I KNOW I DONT) LETS HOPE SHE REALISES IT. HUGS, SAB AND SASCHA
While its not the exact same but i do know what its like.
Pretty much all of my so called best friends havent even seen bubs & he is 9mths old !!!!!!! I always get excuses as to why they cant get here or see him etc now im just over it & dont even bother to call them but yet get told when they do mange to call how "ive changed" blah ! Ive even got friends who havent bothered to catch up with me since i moved back from Melb 3yrs ago !!!!!!!
So as a few of us on here decided us Alisons are obviously losers :p jks
We actually think there is a conspiracy ! heheheheh ;)
Its not worth getting stressed over let her learn her lesson it will come in time & remember you will always make new friends !
There's that saying about friends for a season, friends for a lifetime... I like that.
I go through friends like water through a sive, sometimes it's just time to let go and that person was just there for that moment or that time frame.
Sometimes I sound nasty when I say that?
Don't let it get you down, most people lose contact with friends after babies arrive (as I found out :o ), but they come back when they are expecting and need advice/help.
If the guy is no good, your friend will be back before you know it, asking for advice/help!
Keep an open mind and open heart, there a lot lighter to carry then a heavy grudge :)
P.S. you've already made new friends anyway... a whole bubhub forum full! :p
Mel, it's pretty rotten to be so unappreciated. Maybe your friend will settle down a little after the "honeymoon" period is over? Maybe you could just let her know you feel a little left out - she may honestly not know what she has done.
That's if you want to keep the friendship. Sometimes you just "know" a friendship has run it's course.
I have a so-called "close" friend who has done the same sort of thing to me over a period of about 6 months. I should've seen the signs, because she has done a similar sort of thing before - you know, totally dropped me for any complete d*ckhead of a boyfriend that comes along, but I'm not prepared to make excuses for her anymore, which is what I was doing, considering what she has done is just bad manners! (long story!)
Her loss, anyway! To echo mumforone's sentiments - you've got heaps of cyber-buddies here!:)
hi, maybe give her a bit of time? i know it can feel like you are being dumped, but you have a loving marriage etc, maybe its her turn for some happiness yeah? i dont know the whole story, but the first few mths of being in love are so exciting, you just want to be with that person ALL the time. it doesnt mean you were using your friends before this person came along or anything like that, its just what happens. things settle down usually after a few mths, do you remember? maybe she felt the same way when you met dh! try being understanding and happy for her, like i said this is a response written by someone who doesnt actually know this woman, or you very well either! so forgive me if i am way off, or have upset you in anyway :)
ps my dh and i had had moved in, gotten pregnant and were planning to get married after 3 mths! again i dont know the whole story, but if you know, you know! why wait? :)
I had the same best friend from when I was 6 'till about 21 years old. When she was single we used to have the best fun ever together and I am the loyal type and would have slain dragons for her.
Unfortunately, for me, she was the sweetest and prettiest thing around and I was a little bit funny looking, to put it mildly.
Soooo of course the boys liked her. And I was dumped for any boy that came along every single time.
It all came to head when we were backpacking together and ran out of money. She found a local guy to move in with and just left me. Just like that. No room for me in their appartment.
The funny thing was that I had run out of money because I had been sharing mine with her until her new credit card arrived.
So I know what it is like to get dumped, and have figured out that if a friend dumps you for a guy, they are not worth it
There are plenty of non-dumpers out there, and it was only after I found some that I could let go of the friendship I had had with this girl.
So I am really sorry that you have been dumped by your friend. May I also suggest that she is not really a friend if she does this. I can understand that a new relationship is exciting and you get less time with her, but if you are important to her then she should let you know that.
Sorry for the rant, but as you can probably tell this hits kind of close to home.
Tee hee, and what allyoo said was true - you are not an "alison" are you?
Good on you KM,
I know that I am WAY too sensitive so you might be right. After I had my rant I looked again at the other, more understanding posts and thought that yeah, they might be right, give her a chance.
But if she ever dumps you again and wants to make up, demand an apology written with a twig from an ancient elm tree in her blood.
Hey K's mum,
I just wanted to come from the other angle. And am not saying this is your case at all.
But when I was single, I made this really good friend, when she started working at the same place as me. We hit it off really well, and had so much in common. He hubby was a training school teacher and as soon as he got his first job, they had to move away. I was most upset, and was still living at home (was 19), so I decided to find a job in the same town as her. Which I did, and our friendship continued. One reason I moved over also, was because she was a rather quite girl who found it hard to deal with not knowing anyone and actually making new friends, so I thought that I would help her along. A lot of the time I felt a bit like a "third wheel" and felt like I was at her place too much sometimes.
But then one day I met the man of my dreams. I was sooo happy, and started spending heaps of time with him. It was very hard to balance her with him. I got so carried away with him because I loved him so much and previously thought I wasn't going to find anyone.
She got very upset and said that I had dumped her, and I did feel bad. But you know what, when I looked back and thought, I realised that half the reason her and I hadnt seen each other for weeks (and we lived in a small country town) was because she hadn't made the effort to see me either. So all this time she was making me feel bad, it was half her fault. And then came to realise, that the whole friendship had been based around Me chasing her, Me visiting her, Me emailing and calling her.
Now I am not saying this is your situation, but maybe if you call your friend or talk to her, then at least you have done your bit for the friendship, and see what happens.
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